


Unexpected Relations

by saucyminx



Series: Unexpected Verse [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-15
Updated: 2009-12-15
Packaged: 2017-10-28 09:36:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 52,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/306485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saucyminx/pseuds/saucyminx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jared Padalecki is an up and coming detective with a whole career extended before him, there's only one outcome he'd never prepared for and it comes in the form of seventeen year old Jensen Ackles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Everyone at the precinct called him Texas, for obvious reasons. Detective Jared Padalecki was a six foot five Texan. Most people seemed incapable of pronouncing Padalecki – so the nickname stuck. Jared hated it but nicknames were like glue when you were a cop. Besides, the men in blue's penchant for nicknames, Jared was also cursed with youth. Fast tracked because of some excellent marks at the Academy and his crucial involvement as a Rookie in high profile drug bust. He made it to Detective in time for his twenty-fourth birthday.

Of course, the fact that he'd been given the promotion didn't automatically garner Jared the respect of his co-workers. In fact, his speedy rise up the ranks left people a little suspicious and none-too-pleased. In what he assumed was an attempt to soothe ruffled feathers Jared was assigned to Detective Donna Ackles. She was probably the best Detective in their precinct if not the entire city. Jared didn't see the assignment as a way to keep an eye on him, rather an opportunity to learn from one of the best.

What Jared hadn't counted on was meeting her seventeen year old son and finding him sexy, attractive, intelligent, sensitive... pretty much the guy he'd always _wanted_ to meet only... younger. It was complicated, to say the least, well, it wasn't so much the _finding her son hot thing_ that was complicated. It was the fact that they'd gone out on a few dates and kissed and Jared had barely managed to stop short of fucking the kid on more than one occasion.

It was insane. He was a cop. He absolutely _knew_ that while what he was doing was legal - there probably wasn't a person in the force who wouldn't kick his ass ten ways from Sunday for even looking at another cop's kid.

Jensen. Jensen Ackles. Around six feet of _hot_ , freckled, green-eyed young man – and - oldest son of Detective Jared Padalecki's partner. Special place in hell... definitely.

It had started off innocently enough. Jared had gone home with Donna after a particularly brutal murder scene that left them both rattled. Donna's house had seemed a pleasant alternative to the stark silence of Jared's own condo.

-= Four months earlier =-

His partner's house was cozy, a quiet neighborhood on the outskirts of the city. They were greeted at the door by Mackenzie - a ten year old _teenager_ with enough attitude for five kids her size. She gave Jared the once over, hugged her mother and went off to find _Jenny_ for dinner.

 _Jenny_ had appeared in the dining room just as the plates had hit the table. Flushed cheeks under sandy colored freckles drew Jared's eye. He was a handsome kid. Jade green eyes, the kind of lips that had _kiss me_ written all over them. They had clasped hands, nice firm shake and the boy has assured Jared his name was _Jensen_ , not Jenny or Jen or any of the other variations concocted by his little sister. Jared decided, at that very moment, clasping Jensen's warm hand in his - that he _really_ needed _not_ to see him again.

From the moment he saw his mother’s partner, Jensen had been a little bit hooked. He had heard his mom mention her new partner several times, she had even called him cute but Jensen had just rolled his eyes and figured he would be some geek with big glasses because his mother had a weird taste in guys. But Jared Padalecki was _no_ geek. He was closer to a Greek God and in one flash of dimples Jensen thought he might never need porn magazines again. He could just get off thinking about those lips on him and that would be more than enough. The real kicker was how incredibly sweet he was, all 'thank yous' and 'yes ma’ams' and just the slightest Texan twang that made Jensen's heart leap.

After their first encounter Jensen spent several days hovering by his mother until he found his moment to strike. She'd left her cell phone on the kitchen table when Mackenzie called for help from down the hall. Jensen lunged forward and scrolled through the contacts until he could find Jared's. He barely had time to scribble the number on his palm before he was darting out of the room and down the stairs into his room. It took another two days for Jensen to work up the nerve to call the outrageously hot Detective and even then he dialed and hung up five times in quick succession. It had seemed pretty ridiculous, the idea that Jared would be at all interested in some seventeen year old boy, even if he was gay. But Jensen was a risk taker by nature so on the sixth call he actually let it go through, pressing the device hard into his ear and listening to it ring.

 **You've reached Detective Padalecki. Please leave your name and number and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. If this is an emergency please call 911.**

Jensen snorted at the message, breaking off suddenly when he realized the machine had beeped. "Uh hey, hi this is Jensen. Ackles. We met a few... well yeah, um..." Jensen smacked his palm into his forehead and blew out a long breath. God he was so _not_ smooth. "Okay I'm gonna go on a hunch and assume you remember me since you're my mom's partner. Anyway I... I was wondering if we could talk? I um... do you know Jefferson park on tenth? I'm heading over there and I'll be there most of the afternoon, by the first parking lot. If you have some spare time or something. Okay. Bye." Jensen hung up quickly and stared at the phone in his hand. He was pretty sure Jared was going to think he was an insane spaz and he hadn't even left a phone number.

Jensen went with the assumption that Jared had caller ID because there was no way he was calling back. One message had been brutal, a second would be like torture. Instead he gathered up all his school stuff and slung his backpack over his shoulder, crossing the basement in quick strides and taking the steps two at a time. He yelled down the hall to his mother that he was going to the park before practically running out of the house, pent up energy exploding in his steps. It wasn't like he was foreign to the idea of crushes on older men, hello Brad Pitt? But Fight Club Brad Pitt, not the more recent one who was looking a little haggard.

But there had never been a guy in part of his _real_ life that was older and instantly caught his eye. He'd liked a few kids in his class but even in this more modern society, being gay and out wasn't always the easiest thing. There definitely weren't any other gay guys in his school, or if there were they were shoved so far into the closet they could see fucking Narnia. So maybe Jensen was getting his hopes a little too high for this whole Jared thing but he'd be okay even if they were just friends and hung out, especially since Josh - his older brother - was off at college and wasn't really interested in being buddies and Jensen spent most of his time babysitting his little sister. He could use a, hot, gorgeous, drop dead sexy older friend.

The park was a ten minute walk from his house and Jensen spread out his homework under the gazebo once he arrived, trying to look busy even if his eyes seemed to constantly be sweeping the park in hopes that Jared would make some sense out his message and magically show up. Not that he had any idea how he'd act if Jared did come, but it seemed like progress in the right direction. And Jensen could totally be smooth and not over spaz like usual. Eventually, by some miracle, he managed to actually devote some attention to his Calculus homework, figuring he could be wise and pass the time while actually doing something productive, so he didn't notice Jared until he was already there.

Jared had thought long and hard about _ignoring_ the message Jensen had left him. Seriously. Then he'd started to wonder what would make his partner's son call him and leave a message that sounded... a little strange, tense. Jensen was already at the park, even though it took Jared a few minutes to find him. He was hunched over some books, lost in thought and Jared watching him for a few moments, standing a few paces away. "What you studying?"

"Jesus," Jensen gasped sharply, nearly falling off the table, eyes blinking wide at Jared. "Hey. You scared the shit out of me," he chuckled and dragged a hand along the back of his neck, lips turning up in a small smile. "It's uh... calculus. Sucks."

Returning the smile, Jared moved up the steps into the gazebo and leaned against the railing. "So what's up?" He tilted his head to the side watching the boy closely. Something he didn't want to talk to his mom about? Jared knew that Donna's husband had passed away a few years back.

Pursing his lips, Jensen turned on the seat, dragging one leg up on the bench and curling his arm around it. "Can I ask you a personal question?" He tilted his head at Jared, smiling at the man's frame illuminated by the late afternoon sunlight. _God_ he was gorgeous.

"Sure," Jared frowned slightly and crossed his legs at the ankle.

"Are you gay?" Jensen blurted out, eyes widening slightly. "I mean... it's not... I just..." Jensen groaned and shook his head. "Sorry, that's rude and totally none of my business I know. My mom would totally kick my ass if she heard me."

Jared laughed and ran his hand through his hair. "Is there a reason you need to know that?" His eyes narrowed a little, "I'm not... uh... interested in your Mom if that's what you're worried about." It wasn't a secret that he was gay or anything but with the obvious exception of his partner he didn't broadcast it.

"What?" Jensen's eyes widened even more and he laughed, shaking his head and pushing up from the bench and turning slightly. "No I'm not... worried about that. It's just... I am. Gay. And I don't really have anyone to talk to about it and... I think my mom might have mentioned... just an offhand thing," he shrugged and scratched at the side of his face. "It uh... would be nice, to talk to someone..."

Jared was expending a great deal of energy trying _not_ to watch the way the kid moved. Fluid, like he had no idea how attractive he was. "Talk to someone," Jared echoed. "I could help you find a support group, some kids your age or something. You can talk to your Mom - she's pretty cool, open-minded." Pushing up off the railing Jared moved over and straddled the bench.

"I couldn't just talk to you?" Jensen dropped down again and faced Jared, hopeful smile on his lips. "It's hard to know who to trust you know? And my mom trusts you so that means clearly you're a good guy," Jensen leaned his forearms on the table, smile growing. "And you know, you still haven't answered my question."

"No," Jared smiled, "I haven't." He couldn't help being a cop. "So you don't know a single person besides me you can talk to? No one at school? Why me kid?" Jared's phone chimed at him and he pulled it out of his jacket pocket, looked at the screen and put it back.

Jensen scoffed and rolled his eyes, "I am _not_ a kid. I’m seventeen! I'll be eighteen in March." Huffing out a quick breath, Jensen leveled his eyes on Jared. "What's the matter? Do I annoy you or something? Can't be seen with someone so ugly in public?" He frowned and looked away, trying to not let Jared see how bothered he was by the idea that Jared clearly wasn't interested in any sort of friendship or anything.

"Hey, whoa there buddy," Jared's hand hovered just above Jensen's shoulder for a moment, "I was just teasin' you," he dropped his hand on the boy's shoulder and squeezed gently. Brow furrowed Jared leaned forward trying to get a glimpse of Jensen's face. "I'm gay, yes, and I did tell your Mom - she's a good woman and a better cop than I'll ever be." Squeezing his fingers once more he pulled his hand back, "and you can't seriously believe that you're ugly."

Smiling brightening slightly, Jensen slowly shook his head and leaned forward, "No, I know I'm pretty fucking hot." He laughed, head tilting back with amusement. "So are you seeing someone? If you even have time, I know both you and my mom keep some crazy hours sometimes." Jensen grinned at Jared, resting his elbow on the table and propping his chin on his palm.

Blinking Jared chuckled quietly. Bold. "Is there a reason you need to know if _I'm_ seeing someone? I'm not quite sure I see how that relates to you needing someone to talk to." If he didn't think it was completely insane he'd think the kid was actually flirting with him.

"Maybe I'm just curious," Jensen shrugged and caught his lower lip between his teeth for a moment as he considered Jared. "Hot guy like you, any guy would be lucky to get to call you his boyfriend," Jensen smiled brightly at Jared, picking up his pencil to spin between his fingers.

Clearing his throat, Jared looked away for a few moments to hide his grin. "Okay, so what do you need to talk about?" He shrugged, "other than my love-life." Jared had a feeling he'd been set up here.

"Well... how did you know? That you were gay? Cause I have only limited experience but I'm pretty sure and..." Jensen looked up at Jared and laughed. "Okay so I suck at lying. I really just wanted to see you. And get to know more about you."

Jared closed his eyes for a moment and pressed his lips together. "I... don't think that's such a good idea, Jensen." His phone chimed again and he swore softly under his breath. "Listen, I'm flattered," _and God, he wished Jensen wasn't his partner's son_ , "but... you should be hanging out with ki ... with guys your own age." Yeah, that sucked, to say that - it truly did. He couldn't stop looking a Jensen's eyes even as he spoke.

"But I'm not interested in any one my age," Jensen insisted, leaning forward until he was close enough to reach out and pick at Jared's sleeve casually. "So... I mean, if you're just not interested in me that's fine, I can handle it... but if you are and this age thing is what's holding you back then that's just... lame," Jensen grinned in his best, most sexy way, hoping he could convince Jared that was worth it. Even though his heart was racing in his chest, under laced with the slightest sting from Jared's words. Seriously, being told that the object of your crush was _flattered_ was like a personal insult.

Jared pulled his sleeve away from Jensen, smile fading from his face then pushed up from the bench. "You know kid, if you're gonna start trying to pick up guys who are older than you - you might want to consider what kind of man would actually take you up on your offer. You know I could lose my job if your mother decided that what I was doing was untoward? Have you thought about that?" He took a deep breath and his voice softened, "you're... you're a good looking guy, Jensen. I barely know you but you seem really sweet, bright, don't mess that up." Jared turned, moving toward the steps, "if things were different..." _God_ , if things were different.

Jensen blinked in surprise, stomach churning unpleasantly. This was really his first experience hitting on someone and he had kind of pictured it going differently. That sting from before sharpened and he frowned deeply, pushing up and walking quickly to Jared, snagging his sleeve before he could descend the steps. "That's not fair. You're basically accusing me of trying to be..." Jensen shook his head, surprised as the rejection morphed to tears along his eyes. "It's not like we'd broadcast it or something, can't you just give me a chance? You... you're really hot and super sweet and I just want to get to know you."

Jared's eyes widened as he saw the tears glistening in Jensen's eyes. "Hey... oooh, don't do that..." Jared rubbed a hand down his face. "Fuck," he whispered. He knew that he should just walk away, let this whole thing be water under the bridge, probably even tell Donna. Jared had just never been one for doing what he _should_ do. Reaching out he grabbed Jensen by the back of his neck and tugged him into his chest, "c'mere, don't do that..."

With a soft gasp Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's chest. He underestimated how good the heat would feel against him and he sucked in a quick breath, burying his head in the cloth and inhaling to counteract the tears. "Sorry," he mumbled into the fabric, feeling pretty close to an idiot. He hadn't really anticipated feeling the surge of emotions and he wondered if feeling a little out of control of those feelings was a bad omen. "I'm lame," he forced a chuckle and pressed into Jared, not wanting to step back until he was forced too.

Jared tried really hard to ignore how good Jensen's hair smelled, and how... well, his body was pretty much pressed up against him and that was _not_ an unpleasant thing. His fingers curled round the back of Jensen's neck, fingers rubbing gently. His hair was softer than Jared had expected. "Just," Jared swallowed, "tryin' to be the good guy here, that's all, didn't mean to... well... upset you." Jared was feeling a bit out of his depth. Actually, a _lot_ out of his depth.

"It's not like I do this often," Jensen explained, quite content to keep his head resting on Jared's chest. Even if his body was starting to respond with Jared's close proximity. "Or you know, ever. I just... look I met you once and you are like, all I can think about. So that means something right? Is it cause I'm a _kid_ that I'm feeling something here?" His chuckle was a little harsher then he planned, saying the word kid like it was a curse or something. He definitely didn't feel like a kid.

"Okay," Jared sighed, "I _got_ the _you're not a kid_ message." Fingers curling round Jensen's shoulders, Jared pushed him back a little. "Listen, I've gotta... I have to..." Jared pinched the bridge of his nose for a few moments, "I'm gonna take off now, you okay?" Because really? Jared was so many kinds of _not okay_. He needed to get away from Jensen before he did something stupid.

"Call me," Jensen insisted, curling his fingers in Jared's shirt to try and keep him there. "Please? Just to talk..." he smiled nervously at Jared, stepping into him even as Jared was backing away.

"Oh, _Jesus_ ," he swallowed trying not to look down into those green eyes. He leaned forward, lips hovering dangerously close to Jensen's, "I... uh..." his mouth opened and closed a few times as he tried to fish out the million and one excuses he _should_ have for not calling. Bringing his hands up to his chest he grabbed Jensen's and pried him loose from his shirt. "Okay," he closed his eyes, feeling Jensen's breath puffing across his skin. "I'll call you," he stepped back and turned quickly, jogging down the stairs. He didn't dare look back as he paced back to his truck. He was _so_ going to hell.

Jensen leaned against the railing, small smile on his lips as he watched Jared go. He wasn't sure if he believed Jared when he said he'd call but it didn't matter, he'd put the words out there which meant he _wanted_. Which basically meant he _wanted_ Jensen. The thought made his lips curve up in a smirk and he turned as the truck disappeared out of the parking lot. He had Jared's number so the cop wasn't going to weasel his way out of any future conversations, Jensen would make sure of that.

As he'd mostly expected, Jared didn't call, no matter how long Jensen stared at his phone. He weighed his options for the first few days, trying to decide if he should give Jared some time to call him back. Six days out from the park though and Jensen realized Jared wasn't likely to call him any time soon. Apparently Jensen had to keep pushing if he wanted to get anywhere but one recall of Jared's image and Jensen knew it was worth it. So once he was sure his mom was home and helping Mackenzie with math homework, which logically meant Jared was off work as well, Jensen slid downstairs and pulled up his phone. Jared's number was stored in his contacts and this time he managed to not hang up the first time he dialed the number, small smile on his lips as he pressed the device to his ear.

"Padalecki." Jared was walking towards his truck, phone pressed to his ear.

"Really? That's how you answer the phone?" Jensen chuckled, dropping back on the bed as Jared's warm voice washed over him, stirring up pleasant heat in his body.

Jared really had to learn to check his call display more often. "Yeah, how... how should I answer it? I gave up carrying a personal phone years ago. Don't have anyone who calls me." Jared smiled as he made it to his truck, leaning back against it and turned his face up to the sky.

"Hmm well since my mom does the same thing I guess it's understandable. You know, she does that when I call," Jensen bit down on his lip, eyes fixed on the ceiling. "So... Mr. says-he's-gonna-call-and-doesn't even after six days... how's it going?"

"I didn't know you were keeping track of days already." Jared smiled and looked around, "I'm leaving work, what you up to?" Turning, Jared pushed the button on his keychain to unlock the truck and climbed behind the wheel.

"Hmm just sitting around. Friday night is chick flick night, my mom tries to make a point to hang out with Mack, you know, so she doesn't feel left out and stuff," Jensen shifted back on the bed, kicking his legs against the side. "And what does Jared Padalecki do on Friday nights?"

It really wasn't much like talking to a seventeen year old. "Gonna watch a movie, have a few beers, try and forget work for a while." Some days were worse than other, some crime scenes - Jared wore home like a dirty film on his skin.

"Rough day?" Jensen asked softly. He knew it had been, had recognized the shadow on his mom's face. She didn't talk about it, she never did even if Jensen asked, and after so many years he'd stopped asking. "You... want some company?" He asked hopefully, figuring he already knew the answer.

Leaning back on his seat Jared smiled, "and you'll tell your Mom... what exactly?" He stuck his key in the ignition and fired up the truck, pulling out of his parking spot at the precinct. He could just imagine the conversation he'd end up having with Donna over that.

"I do have friends you know," Jensen scoffed, rolling his eyes. "I can tell her I'm going to Chris' or Steve's, no biggie." Jensen pushed up, crossing to his mirror and picking at his hair, hope fluttering in his heart.

"I don't like the lying thing so much," Jared pulled out into traffic. "You figure out how to get over here _without_ lying and _without_ telling your Mom you're coming to my place then you're welcome to watch TV with me." Let Jensen try and figure that one out.

"What's your address?" Jensen asked, he could take a challenge if that's what Jared wanted to give him. Jensen was smart and crafty, he'd work it out, and already his mind was churning over options.

Laughing, Jared shook his head. "34, 205 Victoria road. And..." he laughed again, "if by some stretch of the imagination you do manage to pull this off - which - I doubt, I'd put money on it -anyway, you're not having beer."

"God you're such a kill joy," Jensen rolled his eyes and scribbled the address on a piece of paper. "So seven o'clock sound good for you?"

"Yeah, sure Jensen. I won't hold my breath - I know your mother. She'll know if you lie to her." Jared was grinning as he pulled into his driveway. "Bye, Jensen..." he pushed the button on his phone and shoved it in his pocket.

Jensen dropped his phone down on the dresser and darted across the room to the bathroom. In no time flat he'd showered and pulled on his favorite t-shirt that was just enough worn to be slightly see through. After ensuring his favorite pair of jeans was snug enough to properly curve along his ass, smirking slightly as he spun in the mirror to observe himself, Jensen tugged his sweatshirt from the chair and pulled it on. He had to force himself to walk casually up the stairs, smiling at his mom and sister on the couch. "Hey mom?"

"Hmm?" She hummed, glancing over at him with a soft smile.

"Can I go to a friend’s and watch TV while you and Mack watch your movie?" He asked hopefully, holding his breath that she'd be distracted enough to not ask him which friend. It was a little tacky to use the 'you're spending time with Mack and not me' card but he knew it was only going to work a little while longer so he had to cash in on it as he could.

"Sure honey, my keys are on the hall table, curfew is midnight," she smiled at him and turned back to the movie, hands stroking the Mackenzie's hair. Jensen beamed and bounced to the door, snagging the keys and tugging it open. "Oh and Jensen?"

He froze mid step, lips pursing together. "Yeah mom?"

"Midnight means in the door at the stroke of. You know city curfew, no driving after midnight under eighteen during the week so you better be here," her voice was laced with that authoritative, 'I'm a cop don't mess with me' tone.

Jensen laughed, "yeah mom, I remember. I'll be home by midnight." He stepped out the door and called out a quick goodbye before tugging it closed behind him. Jensen spared a moment to do a little dance on the front porch, swaying his hips from side to side and fist pumping the air. "Hah," he snorted as he practically ran to the car. He couldn't wait to see the look on Jared's face when he showed up.

It only took him ten minutes to get to Jared's place which meant he was a few minutes early but he recognized Jared's truck so he didn't bothering waiting to head to the door. He slipped his hands into his sweatshirt pocket as he crossed the walk, jabbing at the bell with his elbow and stepping back, a bright smile of satisfaction pulling at his lips.

Jared blew out a breath, he'd just managed to get his ass on the couch with a beer when the doorbell went. Figured. Sliding his bottle back on to the table he stood up and padded back down the hallway, yanking the door open. When he discovered Jensen on the other side of the door his eyes widened. "You... are here."

"It's like you're surprised at my sheer level of genius," Jensen rocked forward on the balls of his feet and grinned at Jared. "You gonna invite me in or just allow me to decorate your porch with my hotness?" His eyebrows rose slightly, amusement crinkling his eyes at the corner.

"Well, you're certainly cockier than the last time I saw you." Jared raised his eyebrows and stood back to the side so Jensen could come in. The corners of his lips twitched into a slight smile even thought all his internal alarms were going off in warning. Closing the door behind the young man, Jared sighed, "so what'd you tell Donna... uh your Mom?"

"You can call her Donna," Jensen chuckled and tugged his hands free from his pockets, curling them under the base of his sweatshirt and tugging it up and over his head. "I told her I was going to a friend's to watch TV and I promised to be home by curfew. No lying, and I didn't tell her who so I followed your rules." He turned to Jared, pulling down his shirt that had ridden up slightly.

"Oh," Jared stood by the entrance to the living room, eyes moving over Jensen's shirt. The flash of skin across Jensen's hip before he pulled his shirt back down pretty much made Jared's mind go blank. "Uh..." he ran his hand through his hair, "soda? water?" He needed to get into the kitchen for a couple of minutes and get hold of himself, figure out what to do.

"Soda’s fine," Jensen wet his lips, trailing after Jared. It looked like his clothes had the desired effect, now Jensen just had to keep up his bravado and things might go the way he wanted them too. His eyes swept along the entrance as he followed the taller man. "I like your place," his eyes lifted to a picture on the wall, Jared standing with two girls, two guys, all smiling with arms around each other. "This your family?"

"Yeah, you can make yourself at home... on the couch... if you want." Jared took a few deep breaths as he pulled a can of coke out of the fridge and poured it in a glass. He just had to entertain Jensen for a couple of hours and then he could tell him that he had to go to bed early or something. He could come up with _something_ surely. "Here," he held out the glass to Jensen, who hadn't gone anywhere near the couch. Deliberately, Jared suspected.

"Thanks," Jensen smiled at him, took a sip then set the cup to the side. He stepped toward Jared and wet his lips, "you don't like that I'm here do you?" Jensen swallowed thickly and lifted his eyes to Jared, smile falling.

"N..No, I mean yes..." Jared scratched at the back of his neck, "I don't dislike that you're here, no..." He took a step back and bumped into the counter. "You... want to watch a movie or something?" Swallowing, Jared looked everywhere but at Jensen's face.

Smile returning, Jensen stepped closer to Jared and reached out to lay his fingers flat on Jared's chest, sliding up to cup his shoulder. "Sure, we can watch a movie... but I want something first," he said softly, sliding closer into Jared's heat.

Leaning back against the counter Jared blew out a breath, "w... what? You hungry?" He gestured to the fridge, "I could get you something..." There was _no_ way Jensen was seventeen. Jared had found it easier to get away from guys at the nightclub than this... man. One minute the kid was looking a bit insecure and the next Jared felt like he was being played.

Chuckling softly Jensen tilted his head to the side and peered up at Jared, hand squeezing for a moment before sliding down to his shoulder. "Would you..." he wet his lips and dropped his eyes, faint blush rising along his cheeks. "Kiss me?" He asked in a whisper, biting down hard on his bottom lip, eyes flickering up to Jared nervously then dropping once more.

"I ..." Jared mouth moved wordlessly for a few moments, "you... just got here." His eyes widened, it was a pretty stupid answer but it was all he had.

"I'm not saying you have to spend the rest of the night making out with me," Jensen snorted, covering for his nerves by stepping back and folding his arms over his chest. "I've just been thinking about it... thought it would be nice... but whatever," he shrugged and picked at his shirt, wishing he could be brave enough to just _make_ Jared kiss him. Then they could get all that first kiss business out of the way and go from there.

Jared managed to get his brain to work again, regardless of the fact that Jensen's jeans were pretty much the most perfect fit he'd ever seen. "Jensen, can we just... can we hang out for a bit? Be friends?" His eyes dragged up Jensen's body, he had _so_ chosen that t-shirt on purpose. "First?" he added, not even sure when there had even become a possibility that there might be more.

Jensen sighed and walked to his glass, picking it up from the counter, "sure, whatever. Even though I know this is basically my one shot. I'm not dumb Jared, I know the reasons why you basically see me as jail bait." Jensen couldn't help snorting at that, "irony there. But it's... you know, no big deal," he shrugged and took a long drink to cover up the soft ache in his heart.

Jared's hand snapped out and took the glass from Jensen and slammed it down on the kitchen counter so hard it splashed out. His fingers curled hard into the front of Jensen's t-shirt yanking him up against his body. "Stop," he whispered against Jensen's lips, "assuming you know what I'm thinking." Leaning down he pressed his lips against Jensen's, and _God_ they were as soft as he had imagined.

Jensen sucked in a sharp breath through his nose and melted into Jared's body, arm wrapping up around his neck and clinging tightly as he slid his lips along Jared's. Heat spiraled instant white hot through and - _Jesus Christ_ \- Jensen was going to come right there in his pants by this one touch alone. He had _never_ dreamed of having his first kiss with someone like Jared. The forceful way he pulled him close, Jensen couldn't help moaning softly as he tilted his head completely to the side and parted his lips softly.

Jared had kissed a fair few guys in his time, but this kiss, was about as close to perfect as Jared could imagine. The way Jensen fell against him, so warm, then his lips parted so... _God_... Jared could feel an ache through his entire body. "Okay," he murmured, loosening his grip on Jensen's t-shirt and flattening it back down with his hand, "now... can we watch some TV?" He was shaking slightly, and leaned back against the counter again.

"Huh?" Jensen's eyes fluttered open, body swaying toward Jared before straightening. "That uh... was..." he licked his lips, pulling in the taste of Jared. Jared's words from before clicked together and he nodded shakily, spinning on his heels and heading for the living. He needed to sit down before his knees gave out, every part of him seemed to be humming with pleasure and Jensen desperately hoped they'd be repeating the kiss, very soon.

Smiling, Jared picked up Jensen's glass and walked back into his living room to sink down on the couch beside the younger man. Smirking, he held the glass out to Jensen, loving the flush on the boy's cheeks. Finally, it felt like Jared might have the upper hand. He was entirely too relieved by that fact.

"Thanks," Jensen said softly and took the glass, pulling long from it before leaning forward to set it beside Jared's beer on the coffee table. As he sat back he slid across the couch until his thigh was pressed against Jared's, heart rocketing against his chest as his head tilted toward Jared and he smiled. "So, what're we watching?"

"I was watching the new Terminator movie." Jared leaned down to grab his beer and took a few gulps. "You like Christian Bale?" When he leaned back he let his hand fall gently onto Jensen's thigh. The kid was well-built, he'd give him that, he obviously worked out, _obviously_.

Jensen settled back so his shoulder rested against Jared's, eyes drifting to the TV. "He kind of creeps me out honestly. A few years ago Chris and I watched American Psycho and now whenever my mom talks about a case or something with a killer I just picture him. So you know..." he laughed softly and shrugged. "Between him and Heath Ledger in Batman I nearly freaked. But um... I've never seen this," he gestured to the TV and clenched his jaw shut, mentally kicking himself for not _shutting_ up.

"You... got much experience? With guys I mean?" Jared took another sip of beer, fingers massaging Jensen's thigh gently. He was feeling a little bad that he'd rattled him so badly in the kitchen. Only a _little_. He kinda liked this Jensen better.

Turning his head away Jensen coughed and ducked his head to hide the blush along his cheeks. "Well um... no, not really," he rolled his shoulders and scratched along his cheek. "I kind of mentioned before, I don't know a lot gay guys. Or... any. Besides you. My friend and I once jacked off at the same time to a porn movie but I was kind of watching him and not the porn..." Jensen's face flamed and he laid his palm against his face and sighed. "God I wish I hadn't said that."

Blurting out a laugh, Jared peered at Jensen out of the corner of his eye, "I'm not sure," he chuckled, "what I think about you saying that." He was still laughing softly as he leaned forward and slid his beer bottle onto the coffee table. "So, you have no experience. You're under eighteen. My partner's son." Jared nodded slowly and sat back. "Pretty much the perfect catch," he jibed.

With a frown Jensen looked down at his hands. He hadn't even considered all of those things, well besides the age thing. And the partner's son thing. Basically it hadn't occurred to him that Jared was _twenty four_ and he probably had loads of experience. Why would he want to be with some loser seventeen year old that once got off watching his best friend get off to two girls going at it? Jensen had _no_ track record and he was a little bit of a freak. Reaching forward, Jensen distracted himself with his coke and slid a few inches over as he sat back. "I'm kind of a spaz," he admitted and shrugged, holding the glass in his hands and staring hard at it.

"Jensen?" Jared turned so he was facing the younger man, "I was kidding." Jared leaned past Jensen to snatch up the remote off the arm of the sofa and flipped the movie of and changed to one of the digital music channels. "So, tell me a bit about yourself, you seem like a cool ki... guy." He brushed his fingers along Jensen's forearm, dipping his head down to try and meet his gaze.

"Um... what do you want to know?" Jensen cleared his throat and took a deep breath before looking up at Jared. "You know how old I am. I'm a senior. I spend a lot of time with my sister, not my choice. I don't work, also not my choice. And um... I have an older brother? He's an asshole. Um... I like music? And movies? There... that's stuff about me," Jensen smiled nervously at Jared, a little thrown off now that it seemed the guy was actually interested in him.

"What kind of work would you do? What do you want a job for?" Jared leaned forward, fascinated by the expressions crossing Jensen's face. "God," Jared leaned into the back of the couch, "I'd love to... not have to work." He remembered being Jensen's age though - it must be hard for him not to have his own money.

"Well, I can't get a car until I can pay for it and I can't pay for it until I get a job _but_ I can't get a job until a, my sister is older enough to watch herself and b, I have a car. So how the hell I'm supposed to figure that out I don't know," Jensen huffed and turned slightly toward Jared. "But next year I'm going to school and then I can work. Save up. I... I want to be..." Jensen's cheeks colored once more and he dipped his head down, rubbing at his thigh.

"You wanna be a what?" Jared smiled and he rested his fingers over Jensen's.

Jensen shrugged and picked at his jeans. "My mom doesn't think I can get anywhere with it. I want to be an artist. Josh, my brother, he said I have to pick a job that will provide me with a future. I think my mom always imagined me going into law enforcement or the order side of things," Jensen looked up at Jared and smiled. "My dad was a lawyer. So if my mom has ever made any law and order jokes, that's her silent way of saying she's thinking about my dad."

"What kind of stuff do you draw?" Jared could see that Jensen was relaxing a little and it made him happy. Reaching up he brushed his hand over Jensen's hair, smiling, _God_ every time those green eyes looked at him he got a little closer to losing the battle.

"Hmm people mostly," Jensen smiled at Jared brightly. "I'd love to draw you. Your jaw... it's... good. For drawing," he caught his lip around a smirk and shrugged. "I like to paint too. Abstract stuff. Sometimes I sculpt. So basically I'm versatile." Jensen laughed and leaned forward slightly. "So what about you? What brought you here? Why are you a cop?"

Stretching his arm along the couch behind the younger man, Jared looked down, "well, I wanted to do something that would help people. Ever since I was a kid I figured there were lots of things in the world that didn't make sense - things that needed someone to kind of make a stand on. I hated University," he laughed, "so being a lawyer was out of the question... _way_ too many years of school." He laughed softly for a few moments, "you can draw me any time you want."

Jensen grinned and nodded, "okay, I'll do that. I have to finish up my portfolio to send into school so... you'd make a great addition." Jensen hesitated for a moment before reaching out to tuck a loose strand of hair behind Jared's ear. "And so... what brought you here?" He asked curiously, slight smile still on his lips.

"Well, ya can't be a cop in your home town, conflict of interest. Not sure why I chose Colorado - like the mountains? Greeley - your mom. She's one of the best, I was assigned to her, I'm young and I think the hope is that she'll keep an eye on me.”

"She likes you a lot," Jensen informed him, dropping his hand to Jared's leg and enjoying the way it felt under his fingers. "She says you have real potential. Which makes sense if you were assigned to her." After a moment he added, "did you know she always picks her partners? From a huge file."

Jared blinked a few times, "no, I assumed... well, we should probably not talk about your Mom's personal stuff. If we're gonna be seeing each other we should establish some ground rules." He watched Jensen's face and smiled.

Jensen's heart sped up at the comment and he grinned, nodding quickly, "okay ground rule number one, no talking about my mom's personal stuff." He laughed and shifted on the couch to better face Jared. "And obviously we have to keep this secret so that's number two. Any other I should be aware of from the get go?"

"No sex." It pained Jared to say it, it truly did. But there was no way, _no_ way he was going to get into a sexual relationship with his partner's seventeen year old son. He could over look at lot -but - Donna trust him and that trust was pretty important to their working relationship.

Frowning slightly, Jensen considered the words and finally sighed, "okay define sex."

"No... intercourse. You need me to draw you a picture?" Jared raised an eyebrow and looked down at Jensen, shifting a little closer.

Snorting a laugh Jensen shook his head and slid a little closer to meet the space Jared moved. "No, but I just needed to make sure. So... touching is okay? And... blow jobs?" He blushed softly but held Jared's gaze, body thrumming with heat just at the thought of Jared's lips _there_.

Jared was pretty sure being around Jensen for any great length of time was going to result in a lot of trouble. "How about we don't discuss this anymore," he could feel himself blushing and _that_ was just going to undermine what little self-respect he'd managed to hang on to.

"I can see you're going to be a tough sell," Jensen laughed and shifted even closer until he was pressed up close to Jared. "Alright fine, I'll let it go. _For now._ So... more kissing?" Jensen suggested with a hopeful grin.

"Do you ever think about anything..." he was going to make another joke but suddenly it didn't seem like such a good idea. "Jensen, I don't want us to get all messed up in something, hurt each other... get complicated." Even as the words came out of his mouth he figured it might be a little over Jensen's head... but he had to say it. Maybe Jensen was as mature as Jared was trying to convince himself that he was.

Jensen sighed and shifted back. There was only so much rejection one virgin seventeen year old could take. "You confuse me," he admitted and shrugged, dropping back and turning to face the TV. "A minute ago you were saying we would be seeing each other and now you're..." he gestured with his hands and dropped them heavily into his lap. "I don't get it."

"Okay truth?" What was that Jared's Mom used to say, _in for a penny, in for a pound_.

"Sure," Jensen half turned back to him, curious despite the haywire emotions coursing through him. A nearly constant thing since he met Jared.

"I figure, you and I, we'll get to know each other, I'll... well, I'll be the one who's left behind eventually. You're seventeen, you're gonna grow up and meet different guys - you're probably gonna go to school right?" Jared looked down, feeling like _he_ was the one who needed to do some growing up. "So, yeah - it's not so much _you_ I'm worried about." He reached over to cup Jensen's cheek, rubbing his thumb across his lips. "You're gonna break ma heart," he exaggerated his drawl - turning it all into a joke yet again.

"But I'm not going anywhere," Jensen reasoned, leaning into Jared's touch. "I mean, I'll move out sure but I... I'm hoping to get into UNC here, it's like ten minutes down the street. And..." Jensen sighed softly. "I've only barely met you and I can't even imagine there's anyone better out there. So why would I want to meet different guys? There will be no heart break involved." He tried a tentative smile, tongue flicking out and catching the tip of Jared's thumb.

The air sort of shot out of Jared's lungs as soon as Jensen's tongue touched his thumb. _God_ , where did he learn all those tricks? Jared found it hard to believe that this kind of sexuality just came naturally. "You are so..." he licked his lips and leaned forward to ghost his lips over Jensen's cheek. His skin was hot, smooth, Jared could feel the heat of the blood moving under his skin. Just like that, his jeans felt too tight, his breath too shallow.

"So what?" Jensen asked softly, eyes fluttering at Jared's closeness. He tilted his head toward Jared's, letting their lips brush together. His breath caught in his throat at the gentle touch and he swallowed thickly before dipping forward to glide their lips once more. He could definitely get used to this heat.

"You're..." Jared's lips moved over Jensen's quickly, his tongue sliding forward to tease its way into the younger man's mouth. It was hot and wet, and Jensen was kind of everywhere at once, but _fuck_ it was good. There'd be no problem for Jared doing this. A lot. He waited until Jensen's tongue started to push forward tentatively and coaxed him, sucking until it slid deep inside his mouth. Moaning softly he leaned back against the arm of the couch, dragging Jensen up his body.

Jensen returned the moan into the kiss, shifting around until he could lie mostly on top of Jared, hand sliding around his neck. The way Jared sucked on his tongue seemed to provide perfect imagery for how it would feel to have him sucking _elsewhere_ and if Jensen's mind was a little one track at the moment, who could blame him? He was lying on top of at least six foot four burning muscle, shaped into some sex god from his wildest fantasies. It was a miracle Jensen wasn't coming in his jeans at that very moment. Jensen rocked his body forward against Jared's working his legs around until he was half straddling Jared and mapping the inside of the older man's mouth with his tongue.

Jared loved the way the boy moved, Jensen was practically riding him and the sudden change from the conversation they were having had sent a fire raging through Jared's body that he hadn't felt in a _very_ long time. Hands feeling huge on Jensen's slighter back he dug his fingers in, then slid his palms down the young man's back and over the amazing curves of his ass. Squeezing, loving the way it made Jensen twist and writhe on top of him, Jared starts imagining the way his face will look when he comes, the green eyes, lust blown and heavy lidded. "God, Jensen..." he was talking against those soft lips, swollen now, silky and slick with their spit.

Eager to taste more of him, Jensen kissed a trail down Jared's face, tracing along the jaw line that he was so convinced would be great for his drawings. "Mmm," he murmured as his lips slid down Jared's neck, hips rocking down into Jared's body for some sort of friction to help with the heat curling up in him. Jensen had _no_ idea what he was doing so he went with instincts, thinking about the places he'd always imagined getting kissed. He dragged his teeth along Jared's collar bone and dropped his hand low on the older man's waist, pushing up under his shirt to lay flat on the muscled expanse of his chest. Heat soared up through him and Jensen couldn't resist shivering slightly.

"Hey..." Jared turned his face into Jensen's hair, inhaling the scent of his shampoo and whatever that was that was unique to him. "D..Don't rush..." Slipping his fingers up Jensen's back, over his shoulder and up through his hair he grabbed hold and tugged his head back. "Slow... don't have to get to everything tonight." He smiled, kissing Jensen's temple, cheek, sucking his earlobe into his mouth and biting it gently. Rubbing small circles on Jensen's back he could feel the t-shirt riding up and his heart clenched tighter for a moment. Spreading his fingers out wide, he hit the flesh of Jensen's lower back - damp with sweat and fever hot.

"Uh huh," Jensen nodded shakily, flesh seemingly burning under Jared's hand. "S-so... wanna just..." he swallowed and wet his lips. "Just make out?" He smiled just as shakily and moaned a moment later as his hips rocked down into Jared's body.

"You're shaking," Jared frowned and pressed Jensen's head against his shoulder. Arms tightening around the younger man's back he held him as close as he could. "Maybe we should just sit here for a while, talk, or... watch something..." He could already feel how easily things could get out of hand.

"As long as there is kissing too," Jensen murmured and brushed his lips along Jared's. "Let's talk more."

Jensen settled in beside Jared on the couch and they once more fell into conversation, this time staying safely away from the complicated possible relationship topics. Jensen rambled on to Jared about his life in this town, how boring it was with nothing to do, how he was always in charge of watching after Mack - even if it made him feel a little important that his mom trusted him so much. In turn Jared talked about his own life, his family back in Texas and the hard transition it had been coming to this small town in Colorado where he hardly knew anyone. So far he hadn't had much luck with making a lot of friends and most of the guys on the local force tended to tease him more than anything else.

Every once in awhile during their conversation Jensen would slide over and catch Jared's lips with his own, igniting a long series of sliding mouths until Jared inevitable had to calm him down before Jensen pushed things too far. Jensen thought it was a little understandable that he was so over eager, he wanted to _feel_. Especially that intense heat, and the thing that would inevitably follow it.

Thanks to Jared's cop training, always being aware of things, Jensen managed to get out of the house with fifteen minutes to spare, after an extended series of goodbye kisses at the door. By the time Jensen arrived home his lips were swollen from overuse and he was still half hard, thinking about Jared's large hand on his back. Thankfully his mother was buried in a file on the couch and only managed a quick hello before Jensen was darting down the stairs to his room to take care of the issue.

He fell asleep with a grin on his face, thinking about Jared and the potential for their future.


	2. Chapter 2

Not surprisingly Jared didn't call Jensen. It was pretty disappointing but Jensen figured it wasn’t likely to happen. After three days of not hearing from him, after pretty much the most amazing night of Jensen's life _so far_ , Jensen called Jared. The detective didn't answer, and when two days passed and he hadn't called back, Jensen knew he had to take drastic action. So the next time he could he borrowed his mom's car and drove to Jared's place, not giving the man any choice but to let him in. Jared didn't exactly look _happy_ to see him but he didn't turn him away so he figured that was something. It didn't take nearly as long as he thought it was going to, to get Jared to cave into kisses once more. They spent another night quietly talking and sharing long, slow kisses. When Jensen left he made Jared _promise_ not to be an asshole and not call him again because by this point there was no use denying that there was definitely something between them. Jensen didn't really believe Jared when he said he would call and he only hoped the man would prove him wrong.

It wasn't like Jared wasn't aware of every day that passed when he didn't see Jensen. Of course he was. Attraction or not, desire or not, he was still trying to convince himself that he wasn't going to fall for the kid and, therefore, _wasn't_ going to get his heart smashed. Two days and twelve hours passed and Jared knew that Jensen couldn’t seem to last more than three days without calling. He picked up his cell phone while he was driving home, thumb moving over the screen slowly. Swearing softly, not for the first time since he'd met Jensen he yanked on his steering wheel and pulled over to the side of the road and called Jensen's number. It didn't take more than one ring and about thirteen words and Jensen was hanging up and on his way over to Jared's. It was surprisingly easy to go along with it once the first phone call was made. Another line Jared had drawn in the sand and then brushed away. But... when he pulled up into his parking spot, Jensen was leaning against his door, all bright-eyed, lips, freckles and hips, everything Jared missed touching when the young man was gone. He sighed as he reached the door, lips on Jensen's before the front door slammed shut behind them. It wouldn't be so hard to call the next time.

The fourth time they met up, or fifth if you counted the park which Jensen didn't really because that was nothing official in his mind, Jared insisted they actually _watch_ a movie. Apparently people on dates ate dinner together and sat on the couch doing something other than making out and rubbing against each other. Jensen complied once Jared let him settle in firmly against his side, arm over his shoulder. It was during that time that Jensen first entertained the idea that he could really enjoy just _being_ with Jared. Especially now when it seemed the cop was less hesitant about the whole seeing each other thing. They got along well, seemed to have a lot of things in common, and Jensen was so ridiculously happy whenever they were together - and for days afterward - that it became something bright perfect in his life. Even if he was continuously sent home harder than he thought possible, Jared refusing to cross that line no matter how close Jensen pushed against it.

It was tougher, with each visit, each _date_ to stop things, slow things down. Jared was only human and Jensen was on fire most of the time. Jared wasn't so old that he couldn't remember seventeen. He could remember it quite well. The strange thing was, it also got easier for them to just _spend time_ together. Jared actually started to feel like he was getting to know Jensen and he really was quite remarkable. True to his word, Jared posed for him - although- he knew he was being had when he was told that he needed to pose without his shirt on and received a portrait at the end that was of his face. But, he liked it - and Jensen was pleased with it and assured him it would be a good piece for his portfolio. He still spent a lot of time with Jensen pressed up against him, sucking on his flesh, hands tangled in his hair. And, he did his fare share of touching, Jensen fit perfectly against his body, almost like they just molded into each other. He spent a lot of time trying _not_ to think about what it would be like to have Jensen in his bed, spread out, naked... and he spent a lot of time in cold showers.

Jensen's sexual frustrations did nothing but grow over their first month as a _couple_ or whatever you wanted to define them as. Even quick jack off sessions post dates weren't cutting it anymore. So Jensen knew he had to get Jared past his hesitations. He really just couldn't handle anymore. It was a Friday night when Jensen finally got Jared to cave. His curfew was extended to one on weekends with the promise of driving safely, and only a little because he'd given his mother his best, "I'm a good student and I look after Mack without question," speech. As usual Jensen was across Jared's lap, only this time Jared was sitting up and Jensen was straddling him, hands tangled in his hair as they kissed, tongues sweeping across each other slowly. Jensen rocked his hips down into Jared's and gasped roughly into the kiss, "Jared... _please_..." It started out as the usual, familiar conversation and Jensen was already preparing himself to be shot down. Only this time he had a plan that would _make_ Jared cave.

Growling into Jensen's mouth, Jared tightened his fingers on the back of the young man's t-shirt. His favorite t-shirt, the one he'd worn the first night he'd come over, tight, worn, practically see-through - it made Jared's cock throb as soon as he saw it. _Jesus_ he had it bad. "N..No," he caught Jensen's bottom lip with his teeth and tugged gently, trying to distract him. Hands sliding down slightly, fingers dipping under the hem of the t-shirt. Jensen's flesh was so smooth, soft, and it took pretty much every bit of willpower Jared had not to end up with his mouth all over it.

Jensen sighed into the kiss and sat back a little, fixing Jared with narrowed eyes. "I can't take it anymore," he huffed and pushed Jared's hands away. Not moving from Jared's lap he laid his hands flat against his chest and slid his palms down to his waist band. As he flicked at the button on his jeans his eyebrow rose in time with the quirk up of his lip. "You don't wanna touch me, fine. But that doesn't mean I'm not gonna touch me," he insisted, dragging his zipper down and shoving his hand under his boxers. Jensen kept his eyes fixed on Jared's face as he worked his fingers around hard flesh, moaning softly with a stroke up, body arching toward Jared's.

Groaning, Jared closed his eyes and let his head fall back. "Jensen... no..." his voice was thick. Really? Closing his eyes didn't help, he could feel _every_ damn move that Jensen made; he could feel his hips rolling, the way his thighs clenched tighter against Jared's. Opening his eyes he grabbed Jensen's hips, fully intending to shove him aside. The problem was he saw his face; looked into those _damn_ green eyes, all black with lust, his skin rosy, lips swollen and wet. Suddenly, instead of pushing Jensen away, he was clutching his hips tight, fingers digging _hard_ into the tender skin. "Jen..." he whispered.

"Plea..." Jensen moaned, throat constricting tightly around the word. It was _so_ fucking hot being on Jared's legs and doing this, feeling the hard bite of Jared's fingers into his hips. Jensen shoved his boxers down as much as he could, grasping as cool air soaked along the raging heat of his cock. Jensen had _dreamed_ of Jared's hand on him, so fucking huge, he thought Jared might be able to engulf the entirety of his flesh and he had to know. "Jare..." he murmured and laid his hand on top of Jared's on his hip bone, dragging it forward, forcing Jared's fingers to curl over his hard flesh. "Fuck," he gasped at the heat of Jared's hand and nearly collapsed forward onto his chest. "Touch me, c'mon Jared... do it," he begged, hips rocking forward to get Jared's hand to move.

Moaning long and low, Jared's fingers curled around the heat of Jensen's hard shaft. Letting go of Jensen's hip he moved quickly grabbing as much of the younger man's hair as he could and bringing him down so he could crush their mouths together. Fingers moving gently at first he stroked the heat of Jensen's cock, the smooth skin, twitching under his touch. It made Jared so hard, achingly so - he was ready to come and panting in seconds. Yanking Jensen's head back, away from his mouth he worked his cock and let his thumb slip over the already moist slit. _God_ watching Jensen, watching him twist and writhe like he was on fire just sent Jared over the edge from controlled to _want_. It was _exactly_ what he'd been afraid of. But - the way Jensen looked at him made Jared clench tighter on the young man's hair and shift forward so he could latch onto the straining muscles in Jensen's neck. He sucked hard, working the flesh with his teeth as his hand moved slowly; letting Jensen's thrust up into his grasp.

Jensen pulled in quick lung fulls of air, body tingling and alive, better than he'd ever felt. Every move Jared's hand made along him sent little darts of pleasure up his spine and then Jared's lips were sucking so hard on his neck he saw stars. "Oh god, oh god," Jensen chanted breathlessly, writhing uncontrollably up into the touch. He didn't even have enough brain power left to inform Jared that there was no fucking way he was going to last. Already he could feel his body seizing up, muscles tightening, everything in him humming loudly until he was thrusting hard up into Jared's grasp and coming all over Jared's hand, shirt and jeans. It was probably a huge mess but Jensen didn't care, just collapsed against Jared, trembling slightly from the force of it all.

"Oh... _Fuck_..." Jared curled his arms tight around Jensen, pressing his boneless body against his own. Blowing out a breath he nuzzled into Jensen's hair, "god... you okay?" He couldn't believe the way Jensen had just come apart like that, he was pretty sure he'd never seen anything hotter in his entire life. Shifting Jensen to the side slightly he groaned, his jeans _so_ tight he was pretty sure he was about to lose the circulation in his balls.

"Y-yeah," Jensen nodded and managed a shaky grin. "I'm good." He shifted on the couch, tucking himself back in to prevent any damage that he might regret before reaching forward. His eyes lifted to Jared's face and he smiled shyly, a little embarrassed as he thought about how quick he'd been. "Can I... touch you?" He asked quietly, hand hovering over the large bulge in Jared's jeans.

The words... just hearing Jensen ask that made Jared's hips roll up and he pressed his fingers into his eyes. "Oooh, Jen..." he _so_ wanted to say no. He should be strong enough to at least shake his head, do _something_. Dropping his hand he met Jensen's gaze, "yeah," he breathed and shifted down a little on the couch.

Jensen made quick work with the button and zipper, shoving roughly at the material until the hard line of Jared's cock was exposed to the cool air of the room. Jensen's eyes widened slightly, tongue dragging over his lips as he stared down at Jared's red and enflamed flesh. He was basically _huge_ and Jensen didn't know what to do for a moment, riveted in spot by the sight. Then a soft noise fell from Jared's lips and Jensen carefully wrapped his fingers around the skin, dragging up slowly. He had no idea how Jared liked to be touched so he tried to imagine it was just like touching himself, thumb sliding over the slit to gather pre-come and stroking back down. All he could manage was staring, mouth slightly open as he quickened his strokes, ears alert for a sign he was doing okay.

"Y..yes..." Jared's hands moved up Jensen's thighs, curled over his hips then slid round to cup his ass. Letting his head fall back for a few moments he moaned quietly and bit down so hard on his bottom lip he tasted blood. His hips were rocking up into Jensen's gentle touch, he was tentative and _fuck_ it didn't matter; Jared was already so hard and _so_ ready for release he could feel the heat swirling in his belly like a fiery whirlpool.

Encouraged by Jared's gasped word and steady touches, Jensen tightened his grip and stroked quicker. He found a pace that seemed to work best for both of them and finally dragged his eyes up the long expanse of Jared's chest. They settled for a moment on his pleasure laced face before he dipped forward and began kissing along Jared's neck. He had long since learned what areas made the man writhe the most and he slid his lips along those, sucking the flesh eagerly. With a little negotiating he managed to get his second hand down to Jared's crotch, working under the cotton until he could roll Jared's balls along his fingers, squeezing at the heavy weight. Jensen moaned into the flesh of Jared's collar bone and leaned heavily against him, alternating his hand in stroking and squeezing and twisting.

"Killin' me…" Jared growled, hand cupping the back of Jensen's neck and he mouthed his way along his neck and shoulder. He thrust up hard into Jensen's hand, his balls aching from the way they were being handled. He could feel his orgasm creeping up through his body, moaned and tugged on Jensen's neck, "fuckin' kiss me..." and as soon as Jensen's mouth slid back across his, he came. His mouth fell open against Jensen's lips, his breath coming only in gasps as hot ropes of come shot over his shirt and Jensen's hand. As his body twitched slowly, bringing him back down to earth he kissed Jensen slowly, softly, then rested their foreheads together as he tried to catch his breath.

"Damn..." Jensen murmured, wetting his lips along the taste of Jared. "That was... I was okay?" He asked softly, using Jared's shirt to wipe off his hand and grinning sheepishly at him as he pulled back slightly. "It was already messy."

Laughing softly Jared shook his head, "I suppose it was..." There were a million things running through Jared's mind, his body was about as relaxed as he'd been in months. _Doomed_. "You okay?" He ran his hand down Jensen's cheek, tilting his head to the side and searching his face for a sign that he was alright.

"Very much so," Jensen nodded, leaning slightly into Jared's touch. The alarm on his phone sounded, nearly making him jump and he laughed, shaking his head. "Damn time, it goes too fast," he sighed softly and leaned in to brush their lips together. "We... we're okay right? I mean, you're not gonna go all freak out on me again and not call until I come knocking right?" He smiled softly at Jared, heart clenching nervously in his chest.

"Absolutely, I never want to see you again." Jared threw back his head and laughed at the expression on his _lover's_ face. Yeah. His seventeen year old _lover_. "God, Jensen - you have _no_ idea how amazing you are do you?" He grabbed both sides of Jensen's neck and pulled him in for one more kiss, brushing their lips together slowly, tongue gliding forward for just a moment. "You couldn't keep me away now," he whispered.

Jensen's heart lurched in his chest and he grinned into the kiss before pressing more firmly into Jared's mouth. After a few lingering moments he pulled back and sighed, pushing off the couch. "Can't be late," he shrugged and looked down at his appearance, cringing slightly. "Maybe mom will be asleep already," he grinned at Jared and dipped in for another kiss. "Talk to you soon?"

"Yeah," Jared pushed up quickly tucking himself back in his jeans, "hang on." He strode down the hallway and snagged one of his t-shirts off the end of his bed and came back out, "here wear mine." He smiled, actually blushing slightly because the idea of Jensen wearing his shirt home, well, it was nice. "It's not clean but it just smells like me," he held the shirt out further, "unless you mind..."

In a flash Jensen tore off his shirt, pressing it into Jared's hand before taking the offered one and slipping into it. Almost instantly he could smell Jared all over him and he sighed softly, small smile playing across his lips, "it's... thanks." Jensen stepped forward and pressed a small kiss to the corner of his lips, hand laying flat against Jared's chest as he leaned into him. "You can keep mine for now but I'll want it back," he chuckled and slid back. "It's my favorite."

"Don't worry, on you? It's my favorite too." Jared grabbed his hand and tugged him toward the door grabbing his jacket as they passed it. "Now, git - if you get in shit - it'll be tricky to get over here. And," he swung Jensen round by his arms and pressed him up against the wall briefly, "I want you back here soon," he whispered. Groaning he stepped back and ran both hands through his hair, "you _so_ better get out of here."

"You're telling me," Jensen laughed and pulled on his coat, tugging open the door and stepping out. He nearly bounded down the walk, turning back to Jared to wave and grin before tugging his keys from his pocket. He didn't check the clock until he got in the car, cringing when he saw he had ten minutes to make it across town. Luckily they lived in a tiny city, far enough away from the college campus to not hit any traffic and too soon for the cops to be out to bust anyone leaving the bars at closing time. Plus Jensen knew all the shortcuts and he made it home with three minutes to spare, calling a quick goodnight to his mom before heading downstairs. That night he slept in Jared's shirt even if it meant the smell of him was mostly gone in the morning, it was totally worth it.

Jensen _hated_ driving in winter if only because it meant he had to take almost twice as long for each trip - thus seriously cutting down his Jared time - and because it was almost impossible to take any of the back residential roads that the city workers very rarely plowed. Right now he was stuck behind an old woman probably out doing some last minute Christmas shopping. Jensen was _annoyed_ because his mom had come home early from work, saying something about doing case stuff at home, and he'd weaseled out the information that Jared had been sent home with his own stack of files to look over. And even though Jensen knew Jared would actually need to get his work done, Jensen wanted to spend time with him. So he'd told his mom he was going to stay the night at a friend’s and even offered to drop Mackenzie off at the Davis' down the street.

Now Jensen was drumming along his steering wheel impatiently and hoping Jared wouldn't be too mad at him for showing up without calling. They'd been together for a total of four months and Jensen was happier than he thought logical. Even if he couldn't tell anyone about Jared and sometimes that was hard. Especially with the way his feelings seemed to be growing steadily and he basically spent every waking moment dreaming about him. It was a little frustrating at times, since Jared wouldn't cross the next step physically and Jensen was getting a little bored with hand jobs. Not that they weren’t amazing, but he wanted _more_ and he hated coming up against brick walls every time he tried.

He was hoping this visit might change things, maybe Jared would be in the Christmas mode - spirit of giving and all - and allow Jensen's lips to travel lower than his belly button. _Maybe_. "Come _on_ ," he grumbled impatiently as the car ahead of him crawled along. Jensen was fully of the opinion that if you chose to live in Colorado, you needed to know how to drive in the snow. There was barely even slush on the ground, they could be doing the speed limit at least.

Finally he was turning onto Jared's street, grinning brightly as he pulled up in front of his place and reaching out for his back pack and the present he'd brought for Jared, fairly certain he wouldn't get to see him over the next week since Jensen's grandparents were flying in for Christmas and Jared would be heading to Texas for vacation. Humming happily he trudged up the walk to the front door, ringing the bell and shifting to hide the present behind his back, albeit not very well since it stuck out on either side of his legs.

Yanking the door open, fully prepared for carolers or some other sort of Christmas nonsense. He was so delighted to see Jensen he just grabbed him by the jacket and pulled him inside, slamming the door shut and leaning down to kiss him so hard he was pretty sure he'd bruise their lips.

Both the present and his backpack slid to the floor as Jensen leaned up into the kiss, arms extending to wrap around Jared and press into his body. He moaned as Jared's tongue slipped forward, sucking on it eagerly before pulling back with a soft gasp, "well," he chuckled and smoothed his hands down Jared's chest. "You sure know how to greet a guy."

Chuckling, Jared tightened his hold on Jensen and closed his eyes as they leaned in to each other. "I missed you," he murmured, "keep thinking about not seeing you over the holidays..." He sucked gently on Jensen's neck, hands sliding down to squeeze his ass. Growling he pulled back a little, "I’m sure you didn't come here just for me to maul you."

"Maul away," Jensen murmured, stepping back into Jared's body. "When are you flying out? You won't be gone too long right?" He asked softly, not wanting Jared to go to Texas any more than he wanted to spend a week with his grandparents. It was definitely a down side to their secret relationship.

"'Bout a week, how long can you stay tonight?" Jared's voice was soft, _God_ he just wanted to fall asleep with Jensen in his arms... for once, not worry about alarms going off and if he would make it home on time.

Jensen stepped back, slight smile on his face. "Mack's staying at the Davis' for the night. Apparently my mom has a huge stack of files to clear out before the end of the year, so she wanted us out of her hair." Jensen shrugged and tugged up the present for Jared and his backpack, walking casually around him before dropping them by the couch in the living room, saying over his shoulder, "so I told her I'd stay the night at a friend’s."

"You what?" Jared's step faltered as he followed behind Jensen.

"I told her..." Jensen turned to him, catching his lower lip for a moment before shrugging. "Is that okay? I know I should have called first and asked... but I thought... well I could always stay at Chris' place or something if you..." it had seemed like a great idea earlier but now Jensen felt a little stupid for assuming that Jared - king of the barely any touching - would want Jensen to spend the night.

"You... you're staying at Chris'? I mean here... you can stay here?" Jared closed his mouth with a click of his teeth.

Frowning slightly Jensen stepped forward, eying Jared. "Are you okay? I know you said no sex so don't worry, I won't try to uh..." Jensen sighed and shrugged. "Jared? Can I stay the night here? Because I'd really like to," he smiled tentatively at his boyfriend, maybe boyfriend, they hadn't discussed official titles yet.

"Yeah, I'd really like that." Jared took a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair nervously, "I've been... I mean... I want that. I do." He nodded, not sure if he was convincing himself or Jensen. "Guess that'll make us kind of official huh?" He flashed a crooked grin at his young lover.

"I've been kind of thinking of us as official for awhile," Jensen shrugged and moved to the present he'd set down holding it out to Jared. It's only wrapping was a bow so it was pretty obvious that it was a painting but Jensen didn't feel like trying to wrap the thing. "I... made this for you," he blushed softly, holding it out and staring down at the ground.

Jared held the painting carefully by the edges and lifted it up so he could see it clearly. "It's perfect," he murmured, "it'll look great in here." Lowering the painting slowly he gazed over it at Jensen, "you're really talented you know." Turning to the cabinet behind him he set the painting up against the wall and stood back admiring it for a few moments. "I really love it." He stood there staring at the painting. "I got you something too," he nodded over at the coffee table where there was a package wrapped in silver paper.

Smile growing, Jensen turned to the table and headed the package, picking it up and running his fingers along it. "Can I open it now?" He looked over at Jared, who chuckled and nodded before dropping his gaze to the gift. Jensen picked at the wrapping carefully until his fingers curled around the cool leather of a book, a sketchbook he discovered as he let the paper flutter to the floor. His heart sped up slightly as his fingers dragged across the cover, curling around the side before opening it. Inside was a pendant in the shape of an artist's palette, hanging from a leather cord. "Jared..." he said softly, eyes flicking up to him as his fingers curled around the pendant, pulling it up and tucking the sketchbook under his arm so he could slide the cord over his head. "It's perfect, thank you," he whispered, bending to set the sketchbook on the arm of the sofa before crossing to his boyfriend and wrapping his arms around his waist, head finding its comfortable nook on Jared's shoulder. "I love it," he murmured, sighing softly.

Jared pressed his hand to the pendent, "Now when you're gone you can think of me." He grinned and tousled Jensen's hair. "I'm gonna hang my painting tomorrow." He squeezed Jensen tight for a few moment and growled happily, lifting him off the floor just a little. "So, what you wanna do?" Licking his lips he dipped his head down to nudge Jensen's cheek with his nose.

"Hmm," Jensen hummed in thought, curling his arms up around Jared's shoulder and enjoying the way the man supported his weight as he leaned into him. "All this time spread before us, it's nice," he smiled and pulled back to meet Jared's eyes. "Do you have files you have to go over too? Cause I brought stuff to keep me occupied if you do." Jensen's heart was thrumming happily and couldn't resist swaying them gently.

Smiling into his lover's hair, Jared nodded sadly, "yeah, I do, just maybe an hour or so..." He kissed the top of Jensen's ear, "you'll sit with me?" He was turning into _such_ a sap.

"Yup," Jensen nodded and stepped back. "I've got two more drawings to finish for my portfolio anyway before I can take it by the college so it's okay. Then we can just enjoy not having to watch the hours drain by," Jensen chuckled as he headed to his backpack, carefully storing his new sketchbook before grabbing his old one that was almost completely full. "Hey can I ask you a question that might make you a little annoyed?" He asked softly as he dropped onto the couch.

"Oh God, I _really_ hate it when you start conversations like that." Jared sidestepped past Jensen and sat down. "Okay, let me have it." He closed his eyes and waited.

"It's not about sex," Jensen said softly and flipped open his sketchbook, lazily trailing along the pages so he didn't have to look up at Jared. "When you're in Texas... will you... are you gonna tell your family about me? I mean, obviously not the whole partner's son and seventeen thing... but you know, that you have a boyfr..." Jensen trailed off, ducking his head slightly and staring hard at the drawing of Mackenzie reading on the couch spread before him.

"Okay," Jared shifted to face Jensen and leaned against the back of the couch. "First of all why would that question annoy me? And, no I'm not planning to tell anyone, I suppose I might mention that I'm seeing someone if they ask. They generally, don't ask me about my sex... love… dating... whatever. You know what I mean." He looked down at the sketchbook then back up at Jensen's face. "Why do you ask?"

"It's stupid," Jensen shrugged, heart sinking slightly. He scratched at his forehead and continued to flip through his sketchbook. "So what sort of case closing stuff do you have to do? Have to give your official signature?"

"Don't do that," Jared reached out for Jensen's hand, "tell me - what?" His brow furrowed, he didn't want Jensen to ever think that he had to hide things from him.

"It's just..." Jensen sighed and looked over at him. "I kind of liked the idea of someone knowing about us you know? I mean, we can't ever tell anyone here and that totally sucks. It makes it..." he shrugged and squeezed Jared's hand for a moment. "I like what we have, and it's good. I just wish we could share it with someone you know? I wish we could go out on dates and go skiing together and do all those things couples do."

Jared looked away for a moment, careful not to let go of Jensen's hand. "I... understand. I mean, there's part of me that really wants to just shove you on a plane and take you to my family... but... _God_ Jensen. I haven't figured out yet how to make this okay... if this can even _be_ okay." He looked up at Jensen's face. "You and I are _okay_... I just don't know about other people."

"It's stupid," Jensen huffed, shaking his head. "I mean, seriously think about it. My dad was seven years older than my mom. Which is a bigger gap then you and me. And look at people like... well most of the celebrity couples. Who _cares_ if I'm seventeen for three more months. There are kids my age with more than one child, there are people my age who aremarried," Jensen rounded on Jared, face growing red with his agitation. "You know my mom got married when she was sixteen. So my dad? He was twenty four. And her parents? They were married that young too. What is the _problem_ with our age difference?" Jensen pulled in a deep breath, fingers tightening into a fist. He wasn't mad at Jared, more at the world for being so utterly stupid sometimes.

Jared held up his hands in surrender, laughing quietly. "Seriously, Jensen it's not the age thing - not for me, come _on_ , you must know that by now." He sighed and reached out to drag Jensen closer. "It's really more about your Mom. Not sure I handled this right from the beginning, I mean, maybe we just should have told her when we first thought we... _fuck_ I don't know." It was second nature now, to just tuck Jensen under his arm, let him sink into his side. "I just can't imagine what she's going to say if she finds out." Scrubbing his hand over his face, Jared dropped a kiss on the top of Jensen's head, "it's still new, we'll figure something out - okay?"

"I'll be eighteen in about three months, then I'll graduate and move out and it won't matter," Jensen insisted, wrapping his arm around Jared's body. "Then we can be more of an official couple and she won't have to know we were anything before." Sliding back he met Jared's eyes before brushing their lips together. "At least she already knows I'm gay, that'll make it a hell of a lot easier." Pulling back once more he settling beside Jared and reclaimed his sketchbook, "okay I don't want to ruin the rest of our time freaking about that stuff. So you finish your files so we can enjoy each other’s company." Jensen laughed softly at the suggestive tones in his voice.

It was a good thing, actually, that Jared had case files to work on because there wasn't a hell of a lot else that could actually get his mind off the warm body next to his. As it happened he spent more time watching Jensen out of the corner of his eye than actually working and after about an hour of trying he tossed his files back on the table and stared at Jensen. "What you working on?"

Jensen glanced up from his sketchbook and shrugged, tilting it up for a moment for Jared to see, "My friend Chris. The only time I could convince him to let me draw him was when he was playing his guitar. Which worked out okay because I got to draw that too." Jensen smiled down at the book and stretched his arm out, shaking the tension out of it from holding it in the same position for too long.

Jared leaned down falling against his young loved and peered at the sketchbook. "He's good looking." He slid his arm across Jensen's waist and nudged his arm out of the way so he could press his cheek into the other man's chest. "You and him never..."

"Well, no Chris is pretty much as straight as they come," Jensen chuckled and smoothed his hand down Jared's back. "But uh, he's that guy. Remember when I mentioned jacking off with a friend and watching him instead. He's _that_ guy.” Jensen pursed his lips and shook his head. "That was a couple years ago though."

"Oh..." Jared smiled but he felt a little pinch of jealousy in his chest and pulled Jensen closer unconsciously. "That actually makes me..." Jared licked his lips and nuzzled into Jensen's side to mumble, "jealous". And it did, which was nuts and then again, Jared was getting used to completely out-of-character feelings when it came to his new lover.

"Really?" Jensen's eyebrows lifted slightly and he shook his head. "Well trust me, compared to you, Chris is like... a Neanderthal. You're just..." Jensen wet his lips, unable to really define what Jared was. "Done with your work?" He asked softly, arms tightening around him.

"I am," Jared grabbed Jensen's sketchbook and fumbled blindly trying to get it on the table then rolled so his head was resting on the younger man's lap. "You were too... _inviting_... and I kept thinking about how much I'm going to miss you over the holidays." He reached up to run his fingers over Jensen's cheek, "and how gorgeous you are." Laughing softly, Jared closed his eyes, "you might be turning me into a complete and utter sap."

Jensen's eyes fluttered softly at the touch and he sighed, "I kinda like it." A small smile turned up his lips and he reached out to slip his hands along Jared's hair, stroking slowly. Jensen stared down at Jared with warm eyes, heart fluttering rapidly in his chest. "Can we go lay down in your bed for awhile? Just... just to..." he shrugged and wet his lips, face coloring slightly at the suggestion. "Not to... I..." he laughed softly at the words he couldn't seem to form and looked away.

"Yeah," Jared's voice was rough, "I would like that a lot actually." His eyes moved over Jensen's face for a few long moments, "Jen, you know I... care about you a lot right? I mean, you get that…" Rolling his bottom lip into his mouth he swallowed. The up swell of emotion in him he wrote off to holiday anxiety and lack of sleep.

Pursing his lips to bite back the little bubble of excited laughter that threaten to explode, Jensen looked to the side and nodded quickly. He couldn’t stifle his grin for long though and he ducked his head, which didn't work well since Jared was looking up at him from his lap and there was really no hiding his pleased expression. "I care about you a lot too," Jensen finally mumbled, losing the battle against the near giddy laugh that fell from his lips, blush staining his cheeks instantly. "Now stop making me feel like a girl and kiss me already," he demanded softly, eyes glistening from swell of emotions.

Chuckling Jared reached up and grabbed the back of Jensen's neck pushing himself up and tugging to bring their lips together. Just like always, the first time their lips touched, sparks shot through Jared's body. Their mouths slid together, well-practiced and familiar and Jared's chest tightened a little at the thought of not seeing Jensen for a while. _Crazy_. He slanted his mouth, deepening the kiss - body shuddering at the soft sounds that Jensen made into the kiss.

Jensen kissed Jared back for several long minutes until heat flared through his body and he found himself rocking up slightly into nothing. "Jare..." he murmured against the man's lips, hands massaging the back of his neck. "Bed?" His heart fluttered just saying the word and he couldn't help considering how far he might be able to get Jared to take things. Maybe he could channel this seemingly desperate need for each other into lips in low places on his body.

Nodding, Jared stretched his arms up over his head, arching his body in a long pull of his muscles. "Okay," he murmured as he rolled to the side and off the couch. "C'mon," he held out a hand and hauled Jensen up off the couch. Nerves fluttered in Jared's stomach; it wasn't the smartest idea he'd ever had but it was going to be worth it. Since they'd started seeing each other Jared had thought about the day he might be able to fall asleep wrapped around Jensen, inhaling the sweet scent of him all night and waking up to the heat of their bodies pressed together. "Let's go..." He moved quickly down the hallway not even stopping to flick the bedroom light on. The moonlight was bright and Jared kept the curtains open - for some reason - he liked to look up at the sky while he was falling asleep.

Jensen's eyes flickered over the room in the faint light, smile tugging on his lip as his fingers curled under the hem of his shirt and tugged up. "So..." he said softly, stepping toward Jared and laying his hand on the man's waistline, shoving up under the shirt. "You and me in a bed..." Jensen smirked softly and pushed the material up, dipping down to suck kisses along the exposed flesh. "Don't worry, I know the no sex rule... but it _is_ the holidays and we aren't going to see each other for two weeks at least..." Jensen murmured in between a trail of kisses, working Jared's shirt up until his lover raised his arms and Jensen could tug it off. "So maybe..." his lips ghosted along Jared's collar bone, kissing up to his neck, finally ending with a gentle brush along Jared's mouth.

"Maybe?" Jared's hand curled around the back of Jensen's head, holding his close. He groaned quietly as Jensen's lips started to drive heat straight to his cock, "maybe... you get your way too much." His voice was thick, _God_ , Jensen barely had to touch him to send his body into overdrive. Slipping his hands around Jensen's waist he licked his lips and ducked his head down and dragged his tongue up the side of Jensen's neck. Hands moving forward, Jared's fingers dipped under the waist band of Jensen's jeans and he slid them forward until he could undo the button and pull the zipper down slowly.

A low moan left Jensen's lips and he arched into Jared's touch, wetting his lips as his body curved. "Maybe I don't get my way enough..." Jensen suggested, hands curving along Jared's back. "After all... we've only... touched..." Jensen was always surprised by how light headed Jared could make him and he rolled forward for more touch. "You know if I had my way we would have done much more than that."

"Jensen?" Jared caught his lover's eyes, "stop trying to talk me into things." But there was a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Pushing his hands under his lover's jeans Jared slid them down over his slender hips, blowing out a shuddering breath. Stumbling back a step he sat down on the edge of the bed and tugged Jensen toward him. Pushing the younger man's jeans down slowly, Jared watched the smooth skin of his hips appear. Thumbs sliding over the smooth skin of his lover's hip Jared hooked his fingers under Jensen's boxers and lifted them to pull them down over the already hardening shaft beneath.

Catching his lower lip between his teeth, Jensen extended his hands to lay on Jared's shoulder, curving over the flesh as his hips rocked forward into the body before him. "You like it..." Jensen insisted, small smile on his face as his fingers slid to stroke along Jared's hair. _God_ Jensen prayed Jared was intending to do more because Jensen had been _so_ patient and he'd never wanted something so much.

Jared pushed on the jeans until they were low enough for Jensen to step out of then circled his arms around his waist and tugged him onto his lap. He'd never had Jensen completely naked before and the heat of his chest, the way he instantly folded their bodies together made Jared shudder with pleasure. Sucking gently on the warm flesh of Jensen's chest, Jared moaned - hands moving rapidly down to cup his lover's ass. " _God_ , I want you so bad," his lips moved on Jensen's nipple, each word brushing his lips over the small hard nub of flesh.

"Oh..." Jensen breathed deeply, eyes fluttering as his body curved into Jared's touch. Heat soared through him, so fast he felt almost dizzy from it all. "Jare... yes..." he nodded, saying yes to whatever Jared wanted. "I want..." his arms tightened around Jared's shoulders, back dipping back to give Jared more room for his lips to move.

Jared pulled back and flipped Jensen over his body, laughing, throwing his young lover down onto the bed. Crawling forward he straddled Jensen's hips and let his eyes soak in every inch of the guy's body. _Fuck_... pretty damn perfect, just like he'd expected. Leaning down he ran his hands up Jensen's body, memorizing the gentle slope of his hip bone, the soft flesh on his belly, the curve of his chest muscles. There wasn't an inch of Jensen's body that wasn't flushed, or taut, desire painted all over his body. "Love looking at you like this..." Jared murmured thickly, arms planted on either side of Jensen's chest. Dipping down he placed a trail of kisses down the center of Jensen's body.

Jensen's mind was spinning, eyes staring down at Jared in slight awe. He'd pretty much thrown him down and that was so _fucking_ hot. As his body curved up into Jared's lips he clamped down hard on his bottom lip, moaning past the flesh. Jensen was fairly certain his eyes were completely void of color, lust blown from the sharp jolts of pleasure sparking along every inch of skin Jared's lips touched. "Jared..." he moaned softly, hand once more settling in Jared's hair.

Breathing out, hot and moist against Jensen's stomach Jared continued to travel down his lover's body. The way Jensen's body arched up into his mouth was crazy-making, probably completely wrecked Jared's ability to think which could explain why he suddenly shifted and dragged his tongue up the underside of Jensen's cock. The overpowering smell of musk and sex and sweetness slammed into Jared's body; he moaned and scraped his stubble covered cheek back down his lover's rigid flesh then buried his nose in the rough curls at the base.

" _Ohgod_ ," Jensen moaned loudly and struggled up for more contact. Jared was basically pinning his hips down onto the mattress though so all Jensen could do was writhe beneath him. His eyes were clenched tightly, pleasure soaring so fast through him he temporarily worried he might come from that one drag of wet alone. Jensen sucked in a deep breath to get control over himself, hands falling to the sides and tightening into the sheets. "I... do that... again..." he whimpered softly, lifting his head to stare wide eyed down at Jared.

Laughing softly, Jared settled himself at Jensen's side, one leg thrown over his young lover - continuing to pin him down. Sliding his hand up the side of Jensen's cock he leaned forward, lapping gently at the hot flesh but never letting his tongue stay touching him very long. Letting his hand slide down he cupped Jensen's balls, rolling the swollen flesh between his fingers as his tongue licked the length of his hardness.

Jensen wasn't positive but he was beginning to think Jared was trying to kill him from too much _good_. Every little touch of his tongue, the sweep of his hand, a constant moving heat along his crotch, was spiraling through him so fast all Jensen could do was suck in deep breaths and let out long moans. He struggled against Jared's weight pinning him down, hand slapping hard on Jared's shoulder and curling into the flesh. " _Jared_..." he gasped, not carrying if it came out slightly whiny and more than a little pleading.

Humming against Jensen's cock, Jared looked up at his young lover's face. "Want... me to stop?" There was a smirk on Jared's face, but _God_ it faded away quickly when he saw how _hot_ Jensen looked. Jared actually had to concentrate to keep Jensen semi-still on the bed, the guy looked like he was ready to shoot right off the bed.

"If you stop," Jensen gasped, staring down at him, "I will _end_ you." It wasn't much of a threat since it trailed off in a moan but he knew Jared wasn't really going to be stopping. It looked like he was enjoying this just as much as Jensen was. Maybe a little less because Jensen was fairly certain this was the absolute best feeling in the world.

Laughing Jared shifted slowly, still staring up at Jensen. His fingers were still massaging his lover's balls, working the soft flesh thoroughly then he turned, flicked his tongue over the weeping head of Jensen's cock and sank his mouth down over the shaft. He took Jensen in his mouth as far as he could, swallowing, feeling the head of the younger man's cock glancing off the back of his throat. _Fuck_ he tasted good, the salty-sweet flavor of pre-come burst to life in Jared's mouth. He moaned loudly, the vibration nearly sending Jensen's body flying off that mattress.

"Fuck," Jensen growled as his hips jolted up, heat bursting deep inside him and instantly tightening all his muscles. "M'gonna..." he gasped, hand hooking around Jared's neck and squeezing tightly in warning. There was no way Jensen could hold on any longer. Jared's mouth had been teasing him for too long now and it was so much easier to simply surge up and moan loudly, muscles tensing. Within moments his orgasm tore through him, eyes slamming closed as he rocked up into the heat of Jared's mouth eagerly.

Jared sucked his lover eagerly, tongue swirling to capture ever hot spurt of release it could. The way Jensen writhed, his muscles tightening and his body launching up toward Jared nearly made the older man come. _God_ he couldn't begin to imagine the things that Jensen could do to him if... _Jesus._ Pulling back, he let his lover's flesh slide from his mouth and slid up the capture Jensen's lips with his; "taste yourself," he mumbled, lapping at Jensen's lips.

Jensen opened his mouth eagerly for Jared's tongue, heart slowly working its way back to a normal pace. He let his own tongue tangle along his lover's for a moment before pushing back, sliding forward to taste the salty remnants of himself along with the familiarity of Jared. Jensen moaned into the kiss and wrapped his arm around Jared; bringing him close to deepen the kiss until he was satisfied he'd touched every surface. Then he pulled back, slightly panting for breath, eyes wide. "Wow..." he murmured, collapsing back onto the pillow.

"Merry Christmas," Jared whispered into Jensen's ear, gathering the young man into his arms. It was going to be a really long couple of weeks until they saw each other again. He blinked sleepily, nuzzling into Jensen's neck. "Smell good," he murmured.

"Best Christmas ever," Jensen said softly in returned and nudged at Jared until he had him on his back. "I want to return the favor," Jensen insisted, though nerves sparked up at the thought. He knew how big Jared was and that was a little scary, but really hot too so it evened out. He brushed his lips against Jared's before dipping down to kiss his neck. "That okay with you?" He asked across Jared's skin, hand falling to his lover's crotch and rubbing into the jeans.

Jensen's touch burned through his jeans and sent Jared's hips jolting up off the bed. "S... okay..." he squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his hips back down on the bed, "if you don't want to..." he shuddered, one hand settled on the slightly damp skin of Jensen's back. "Don't mind," he murmured as his head fell back onto the pillow, shoulders arching back and pushing his chest up off the bed.

"I just said I did," Jensen chuckled and slid his hand up to the button on the jeans, unhooking it with a quick twist and dragging the zipper down. Pushing up on his knees he smiled down at Jared before hooking his fingers in both denim and cotton, pulling up over the hard line of his flesh and dragging down to throw the material off the edge of the bed. Jensen allowed himself a moment to stare hungrily down at Jared's body, head slightly tilted to the side. "You know... I think you might be the hottest fucking guy alive," he informed Jared with a smirk, climbing in between Jared's legs and pressing both hands down into his thighs to rub firmly.

Jared's muscles were straining as he tried to stay still, hips rolling slightly up into the air, "okay, okay," he growled. "Touch me," he pushed up onto his elbows, staring down the length of his body and locking eyes with Jensen. He wanted this, no doubt in his mind and certainly no doubt in his body. Licking his lips he dragged a deep breath into his burning lungs and stared hard. Just thinking about Jensen's full lips on his cock made it bounce gently against his stomach.

Chuckling roughly Jensen nodded and curled his fingers around Jared's cock, stroking slowly along the base and dragging up before sliding down. His eyes fixed on the red flesh and he wet his lips slowly before sliding forward and flicking his tongue along the tip, tasting the smear of pre-come there. "Hmm," he hummed in thought, rolling the taste over his tongue. It wasn't enough to properly grasp how Jared tasted so he leaned forward and sucked the crown in, working his lips over the flesh. He climbed to the other side of Jared's legs so he could flop down on his lover's waist, keeping him pinned down to properly explore the hard flesh with his tongue.

Hips bucking up into Jensen's mouth, Jared moaned and fell back onto the bed. It wasn't nearly enough and Jared's hand shot down to grip Jensen's shoulder, gripping tight. The weight of his lover across his body was the only thing keeping him sane enough to stay on the bed. Months he'd wanted this, wanted _more_ \- giving in this much had taken him _so_ long. Bursts of desire flooded through his body, "Jensen..." he murmured.

Jensen sucked in a deep breath and opened his jaw, sucking in as much of Jared as he could. The flesh felt warm and heavy in his mouth and Jensen hummed pleasantly, sliding back when he took too much in and swallowing to keep his gag reflex from reacting. Jensen puffed out a small breath over the swollen skin and stroked his fingers along the length of Jared's cock. Like Jared had done to him, he laid the flat of his tongue along the underside of Jared's cock, hand slipping down to cup Jared's balls. He sucked Jared's length into his mouth once more, hollowing his cheeks to apply pressure along the hard flesh.

It was almost too much to bear, the heat of Jensen's mouth, the vibrations of the small noises he made. Curious fingers moved over him, sending sparks along his skin and making him dig his finger hard into his lover's shoulder. The pressure from Jensen sucking made Jared's abs clench, he could feel his cock weeping under his lover's tongue.

"Your taste..." Jensen murmured, eyes lifting up to Jared's face to watch the expression on his face for a moment before dipping back down. He worked his grip on Jared's flesh for a slow few moments before trailing his tongue in slow circles over the flesh. Jensen once more opened his mouth over Jared's hard length, sucking him in hard. He wanted to taste Jared's release, wanted to see how it felt to feel Jared come apart because of his lips.

Hips rocking up under Jensen's body, he couldn't help thrusting his cock up deeper into the wet heat of his lover's mouth. Jared's heart was thudding against his ribcage and he could feel his orgasm start to build within him. "Jen..." he moaned, trying to pull the younger man away, "m'gonna..." He fought for control trying to give Jensen a moment to pull off, groaning and trembling as he tried to hold still.

Jensen simply sucked harder on Jared, not letting Jared pull him away and growling around the flesh. His hand along the bottom of Jared's hard length quickened pace, stroking hard and fast, twisting his wrist in the way he knew Jared liked best. He knew his lover was only moments from coming and he relaxed his jaw as much as possible, ready to swallow everything the man had to offer.

" _Fuck_ , Jensen." Jared's free hand slammed into the headboard above him, fingers curling around the bars. Hips snapping up, his body stretched out on the bed as his orgasm sparked to life and shot through his body in pulsing waves. Coming hard, so hard his breath caught in his chest as he arched up off the bed, Jared murmured Jensen's name over and over. Shooting his release in his lover's mouth he cried out, falling back to the bed, fingers slipping off Jensen's shoulder.

Taste exploded inside his mouth and Jensen swallowed as fast as he could, stroking Jared through his release until the man began to grow soft beneath him. He pushed back after a moment, sucking in a deep breath and dragging his thumb up the line of come dripping down the side of his mouth. Jensen sucked the finger into his mouth, pulling off the taste as his eyes flicked up to Jared. "How was that?" He asked softly as he crawled up Jared's body, sliding his lips over Jared's.

" _Jesus_ ," Jared rolled them quickly so he was covering his lover's lithe body, pressing him down into the bed, "I wanna..." _God_ , he'd never wanted anyone more. Still panting, he settled down partly covering Jensen's chest, hand moving over his lover's body, his side, down his muscular thigh. "I'm... glad," he sighed out a breath and kissed a trail along Jensen's collar bone, "you're... staying." _Glad you're mine_ , was what ran through his head. He couldn't stop touching him and laughed softly at himself as his breathing started to even out.

Jensen was quite content to allow Jared to touch every inch of him. He sighed blissfully, body curving up into his palm. "Me too..." he whispered, shoving at Jared until he could roll on top of him, straddling his hips and grinning down at his lover. "Gettin' tired old man?"

"No," Jared's eyes gleamed as he grabbed onto Jensen's hips, "I'm not." Sitting up quickly he wrapped his arms around Jensen and slid their lips together.


	3. Chapter 3

Before Jared had left for Texas Jensen made his _boyfriend_ give him his flight itinerary. Which was why he was bouncing around the day Jared _finally_ got home. The past two weeks had been practically hell without him. Because of both being so busy with family, they'd only been able to share a few brief conversations and emails and Jensen was just itching for a Jared fix. He impatiently watched the clock as Jared's flight landed, a little disappointed when a half hour went by without a call. In the end he decided Jared probably didn't want to call during the hour drive home because of the road conditions and the fact that the cops always hovered along highway eighty five. Jared wasn't one to abuse his power in any way, shape, or form.

When two hours had passed since Jared had landed, Jensen's excitement gave way to nerves and he frowned deeply. Halfway through the third hour he caved and called. For all he knew Jared had been injured or something. If the man didn't answer then Jensen would think up some weird excuse to get his mom to look into it. He punched the number on the phone and pressed it to his ear, pacing slightly.

"Padalecki." It was sort of a mumble, Jared was lying face down on his bed.

Jensen laughed, blowing out a quick breath in relief. "Dude, caller ID exists for a reason! Where have you been? I told you to call me when you got off the plane!" Jensen couldn't help grinning, just hearing the gruff voice made his heart quicken.

"Was lying down, Jesus, I just walked in the door," he snapped. He hadn't meant to but he really _was_ tired and he'd been hoping to have a few more hours of peace before having to talk to Jensen.

Jensen's smile faltered and he stopped moving, blinking a few times in surprise, "I... sorry. I didn't realize the roads were so bad..." Something unpleasant twisted in Jensen's gut and he rolled his shoulders, trying to shake off the feeling. "So... when can I come over? I talked to my mom and she's okay with me staying at a friend's for the night since school doesn't start up again until next week," Jensen's smile returned slightly and he glanced toward his bag.

"I dunno, Jensen," Jared rolled over onto his back. "I was thinking," he cleared his throat. He hadn't wanted to have this conversation so soon but... "while I was away, I was thinking that maybe we were getting too close to each other." Jared pinched the bridge of his nose and listened to the sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line.

"Too... close?" Jensen repeatedly slowly, tears pricking along his eyes at just the thought. "But... but last time... I thought..." Jensen didn't understand why Jared was saying this, the last time he'd been with Jared he could have sworn they were... Jensen swallowed thickly. "Jared?" He asked quietly, searching for some understanding.

Jared moved the phone away from his mouth so Jensen wouldn’t hear the breath he struggled to get into his lungs. "Yeah," he bit his bottom lip for a few moments, "maybe... we should have a break for a bit or something. Cool things down." He closed his eyes, chest aching like he'd been sucker punched.

A sob caught in Jensen's throat and he tried to fight it back, turning away from the phone. His eyes blinked rapidly, mind swirling with the words. "I... I don't... but..." Jensen could feel the tears streaming down his cheeks, dropping onto his hands in tiny splashes. "Jared... w-why... don't you..." Jensen sucked in a quick breath.

"I’m s..sorry," Jared swallowed hard, "I'll... I"ll give you a call sometime okay?" It was killing him to hear how upset Jensen was; it felt like someone was squeezing the life right out of his heart. "Okay... bye... Jen." Jared stabbed at the end button on his phone and let it fall from his hand. Rubbing his hand down over his face he covered his mouth for a few moments, swore and slammed his fist into the mattress.

Jensen stared at the phone in his hand, feeling like somehow Jared had just reached through the device and torn his heart out of his chest. He didn't understand what he'd done. Had he called too much? Was he not good before and Jared was just too nice to end things with him there? Was Jensen too clingy or needy? Sucking in a quick breath Jensen turned to the nightstand to grab his sketchbook, flicking it open to the drawing he'd done on the first page. It was from a picture he'd taken with his cell phone the night he stayed at Jared's. Their hands were intertwined, Jared's longer and thicker fingers laced between Jensen's thinner ones, pressed into Jensen's chest.

"Jared..." Jensen whispered, curling his fingers around the picture. He tugged it out quickly, folding it in half and pushing up. He would _make_ Jared understand. This was too important, the thing they had, and Jared couldn't just give up on him yet. Jensen could _change_ and he would for Jared, whatever the man needed as long as it didn't include them not being together. He shoved the drawing into his pocket and pulled on his coat, fingers ghosting over the pendant at his neck he hadn't taken off since the day he'd gotten it. They would be okay. Jared just over thought things some times. Jensen needed to remind him how wonderful they were together.

Within minutes he was up the stairs and getting permission to take the car. His mom was enjoying the last day of her vacation with Mackenzie, watching their usual chick flicks and giggling. Jensen forced himself not to lose control as he darted out the door and slid along the sidewalk. It was going to be a miracle if he didn't crash on his way to Jared's.

Every moment Jared had been away for the Holidays he'd been thinking about Jensen. Would Jensen like his family? If he could take Jensen horseback riding he could show him his favorite view of the ranch. If he saw couples holding hands he thought of taking Jensen's hand in his and walking downtown with him. The longer he was away the more impossible their relationship seemed. Unfair, it was unfair to Jensen. He didn't have a real boyfriend, he didn't have someone who could take him out, spend time with him. Basically, Jared felt like he was holding Jensen back from living a life _with_ someone.

" _Fuck_ ," Jared pushed up off the bed and ran a hand through his hair quickly. The problem wasn't Jensen. The _fucking_ problem was that Jared was falling in love with Jensen. The problem was that it couldn't work out, things were too messed up. Jared had handled the entire thing poorly. He should have spoken to Donna up front - long before he and Jensen had any kind of relationship. The _problem_ was that Jared needed to put an end to this before they got hurt even more. Before Jensen realized that he deserved much more, before someone found out about them. _Before_ Donna found out how Jared had betrayed her trust. _Before_ Jensen broke Jared's heart.

Jensen was relieved to make it to Jared's house, sadness in him temporarily stifled by the excitement of seeing Jared. It seemed impossible, that Jared would turn him away now. He'd tell Jared exactly how he felt, hell Jensen was even willing to step back from the physical part of their relationship until he turned eighteen if that was what it took for them to be together. It was freezing outside and Jensen bounced on the balls of his feet as he approached the door, jamming his finger at the bell before stuffing his hands in his pockets, looking over his shoulders as he waited for Jared to answer.

Standing on the other side of the door, Jared swore softly and ran his hand through his hair. He cracked the door open and blinked at Jensen. "Hey... Jensen..." He rubbed at his forehead. "I'm really tired. Can we do this some other time?" Tired, and seeing that _face_ in front of him - yeah, really not helping.

Jensen huffed and shook his head, "Jared Padalecki I am standing on this porch until you let me in. So if you don't want me to freeze to death out here and then explain _that_ to my mom, then you better let me in." It was taking about all of his strength to not let Jared see just how much he felt like he was breaking. Jared couldn't _do_ this to him.

Pushing the door open Jared spun and strode down the hallway. Heading straight for the kitchen he yanked the fridge door open and grabbed a beer. There were some situations that required alcohol and if this wasn't one of them he didn't know what was. By the time he headed back into the living room Jensen was standing there. "Jensen, really, I'm tired and... I've been traveling all day." Flopping down onto the couch Jared popped the top off his beer and took a few gulps.

"That's fine, we can just relax here," Jensen insisted and tugged the zipper down on his coat. "I can be quiet, we can watch TV or take a nap. I'm okay with that," he laid the coat on a nearby chair and moved over to the couch to sit beside Jared, reaching out for his hand.

"Jensen, don't do this." Jared pulled his hand back and shifted a little further away pulling his leg up on to the couch between them. "I was clear, I _know_ you're not stupid." Eyes averted, Jared took another sip of his beer. "We need to stop seeing each other," he cleared his throat, "for a while... or something."

"But..." Tears welled up instantly again in Jensen’s eyes and no matter how hard he tried to fight them off; he couldn't stop them from streaming down his cheeks. "I don't _understand_ ," he stared hard at Jared, mouth slightly open. "What did I do wrong? I can change. I can make it better... please..." he slid forward once more, reaching out for Jared, praying he'd just _stop_ this and keep Jensen's heart from continuing down this path that felt too much like it was breaking.

Jared could barely swallow, his voice was gruff when he managed to get words out, "Jensen, no, you didn't do anything... wrong... it's just me. I..." He gritted his teeth for a few moments trying to get a hold of himself. "I can't do this anymore." Clasping both his hands around his beer bottle he stared down at it, trying to think of anything other than the tears he knew were falling down Jensen's cheeks. It took everything he had not to just snatch Jensen into his arms.

"But why?" Jensen whispered, voice tight in his efforts to keep from sobbing. He shifted closer and reached out, laying a shaking hand on Jared's neck. "Please, don't do this," he begged quietly, leaning closer to catch Jared's smell, sucking it in with a half sob to try and find some comfort.

Reaching up Jared curled his fingers around Jensen's wrist and pulled his arm down, fingers moving away quickly as though scalded. _God_ he couldn't take a lot more of this. "Jensen, I've made up my mind." Jared looked away staring at the blank TV screen.

"You can't do this," Jensen insisted, eyes fixed on his hands, unwilling to believe how very _cold_ Jared was being to him. He clung to the last little bits of hope, gasping out through a sob, "I love you. Please stop... you're breaking my..." the words cut off through another ragged sob, causing him to fold together, grasping at his chest for some comfort.

The words cut straight through Jared's heart and he launched up off the couch, dropping his beer bottle. "Fuck." He snatched the bottle back up off the floor and rubbed at his forehead. "You don't love me... it's... it's too soon." He stepped around the table and moved quickly into the kitchen grabbing some paper towel and taking a few moments to try and quell the emotions that were storming within him. Back in the living room he knelt by the table and mopped up the beer, "Jensen, this is getting out of hand. I'm sorry you're hurt but think how bad it would be... later." He dumped the wet paper towels on the table. "You're young Jensen, you don't even..." He broke off his own words and sank back down onto the couch.

Jensen shook his head, "You're wrong. It's not too soon. I was talking to Michelle Williams and we... I told her... about us I had to because I needed to _talk_ to someone and she swore she'd keep it a secret but she says I can feel this way now. I _do_ ," he insisted once more, pushing up off the couch to face Jared, wiping his sleeves across his cheeks. "You gotta believe me."

"You what?" Jared's blood ran cold in his veins. "Williams as in Chuck Williams daughter? Detective Chuck Williams. Your mother's friend. _Jesus Christ_." Jared pushed up off the couch and paced across the room. "You see? You see why this was a stupid fucking idea? Do you realize what will happen if she tells her father Jensen?" He threaded both hands through his hair and shook his head. "You need to go." All it would take was for someone to go to Donna, tell her before Jared got a chance to speak with her and everything would be shit.

"She swore she wouldn't tell anyone. I trust her," Jensen insisted, stepping toward Jared. He _had_ to make Jared understand. "She won't tell anyone Jared but you're missing the point. Don't make me go... I love you," Jensen had to keep pushing because he _knew_ Jared felt the same. He had too.

"Enough!" Jared yelled. "Jensen," he tried to steady his voice, "sorry... I shouldn't have yelled. I'm not changing my mind. You need to calm down and then you need to go home. I can't do this anymore." Leaning back against the wall, he looked over at Jensen's face and had to stuff his hands in his pockets so he didn't just go rushing right over there. "You're a great guy, Jensen." It sounded stupid and hollow in his own ears, "someone is going to be really lucky," his voice broke a little and he coughed trying to cover it up, "lucky to get to spend their life with you."

Something snapped in Jensen, anger flaring in the wake of the harsh turmoil pumping through him. "Fuck you," he spat, turning away from Jared and shoving his hand roughly in his pocket, pulling out the paper. "You're such a fucking _coward_. Just too concerned about yourself and your precious _career_. I would have given you _everything_. Fuck I gave you my _heart_." Jensen's shoulders shook and he threw the paper at Jared, crossing the living room swiftly to his coat and shoving his arms roughly in it. "Thanks for breaking my heart Jared. That's just really fucking great of you." He fumbled with the zipper before heading swiftly for the door.

Jared took two steps toward Jensen then stopped. He deserved that, deserved every word that stabbed into him. He waited until he heard the door slam behind Jensen and kneeled down to pick up the paper with a shaking hand. He hadn't even noticed that he was crying until a tear dropped onto the drawing. Blowing out a shuddering breath he took the drawing and settled back onto the couch, wondering how long it would take to drink himself to unconsciousness. Apparently it took three hours and nearly all the beer in his fridge.

It was a miracle Jensen made it home safely since he was driving through tear stained eyes. The moment he stepped inside he lost all remaining hold on himself, collapsing to the ground and sobbing loudly. Within moments his mom and sister were by his side, trying to soothe him enough to find out what was wrong. Jensen didn't say a word, just allowed them to get him downstairs and undress him to his boxers, slide him under the blankets. After awhile they gave up trying to get him to talk, just left him alone and Jensen stared up at the ceiling, wondering if he really had woken that morning, so excited and _in love_. Jensen hoped this was all just some horrible nightmare, even as he knew it wasn't. He never expected Jared to bestow this type of pain on him and Jensen didn't know if he was strong enough to handle it.

At first Jared was late a few mornings for work. He couldn't sleep and then when he did sleep he couldn't seem to drag his ass out of bed. After a few days, he slid the drawing inside one of his books - unable to even face looking at it. Days became a week, and not surprisingly, it didn't feel any better to hear his phone ring and have that thrill run through him that it might be Jensen only to be replaced by the falling sensation in the pit of his stomach. Jensen hadn't called in the first week and Jared knew it was over. He'd successfully fucked up probably the best thing he'd had in his life. The only way he made it through the first week was to keep thinking that, ultimately, this would be better for Jensen. He was young, gorgeous, talented, bright... and every time that list started to run through Jared's mind his throat would clench tight and he'd feel like a total hypocrite.

The second week, Jared managed to make it to work on time. He didn't feel much better but he figured that his body had just had enough misery for one lifetime. Maybe, he could only hurt for so long, hate himself for so long before it was time to move on. Learning to live with the way it felt. Getting dressed for work he realized that his pants felt a little loose and made a mental note to eat better. Beer, obviously didn't have all of the nutrients he needed. As the end of the week approached, Jared was just trudging through his days, immersing himself in work whenever possible. He stayed late every night, home, seemed emptier somehow and on his way to get coffee he noticed Donna was still in her office. Poking his head round the door frame he smiled, "hey, didn't know you were still here - you want a coffee?"

"Sure," Donna nodded, glancing up at Jared for a moment before looking back down. Jared disappeared to go retrieve the coffee and Donna stared down at the file until he returned, silently stepping forward to offer her the drink. "Thanks," she smiled briefly at him and picked up her phone when it chimed. She read the words quickly then sighed, shaking her head slowly.

"What's wrong?" Jared sat down in the chair across from her desk. "Everything okay?"

Donna pursed her lips, sipping from her coffee before setting it back down. "Oh it's just... my son," she sighed once more and shook her head. "Jensen. He's just been throwing me for a loop these past few weeks."

Really? Jared should have walked out the door, but the chance to hear news about Jensen was a bit too tempting. "He doing okay?" Of course he wasn't doing okay you _shit_. Jared gripped his coffee cup so hard it started to dent so he reached out and put it on Donna's desk.

"I don't think so, but lord knows what it is," Donna shook her head sadly. "You know, for the past four years all he's been talking about is art school and how excited he was about it. So right before Christmas he turned his portfolio into the university," Donna blew out a long breath and shifted on her seat. "Three days ago the Dean of the art department called to extend a _full scholarship_ for their program and you know what he said to him?" Donna's eyes shot up to Jared, slightly wide with concern. "He said no thank you. That he wasn't planning on going to school any longer. And he won't tell me why, he won't tell me anything. He even took down all his art off his walls. And Jensen is good. He's amazing. I just don't get it."

Jared's heart felt like it was in his throat. "He... wow... why?" He took a sip of his coffee trying to buy himself a few moments and burned his tongue. "Fuck... hot..." he mumbled. Wiping at his mouth Jared blinked a few times, "his art was beautiful... wasn't it?" Jared recovered from his fumble quickly, "I mean I've heard you talk about it. Maybe he's just not feeling confident about it or something." Jared felt about two inches tall and wanted to crawl right back out of Donna's office.

"It is beautiful," Donna turned in her chair, pulling open a drawer and tugging out a sketchbook. "Take a look, he has some real potential. I mean, I can't say I've always been the most supportive only because it's not a solid career but I never wanted him to stop." She leaned forward, offering the book to Jared, "I spoke with the Dean and he said the offer stands if Jensen changes his mind, I'm hoping whatever he's going through will pass and he'll get better. But I saved this and three more boxes worth of art from the trash man the other day. So it's hard to say."

Seeing the sketchbook and hearing that Jensen had thrown it out made tears prickle at the edges of Jared's eyes. He ducked his head down running his hand over the book and sliding it closer. "May I?" Donna nodded and Jared slid his hand down the side of the front cover opening the book. He knew what drawings were in there he'd flipped through the damn book so many times he had it memorized. Brow furrowed he noticed that all the portraits and sketches that Jensen had done of Jared were gone. Biting his lip Jared closed the book and slid it back. "He's really talented. I..." he cleared his throat, "I hope you can help him with what he's going through. You're a great mom, Donna."

"Well it would be a lot easier if he'd talk to me," she sighed and shrugged her shoulder in a defeated way. "All he does is sit around, stare out the window, hold on to that damn necklace that is just as much as a mystery to me as everything else. All I can think is it's some teenager thing. Maybe he just doesn't feel comfortable talking to me about those sorts of things." Donna wet her lips and slid closer to the desk, looking up at Jared. "How are you doing? I know you've seem off since your vacation, did anything happen in Texas?"

"N..No... I... well," Jared looked down at his shoes, "I broke up with this guy I was seeing." Somehow, saying it out loud made it feel as fresh as if it had happened yesterday. Glancing up at Donna, Jared shrugged and wiped at the tear on his cheek. "Fuck, sorry... s'just..." he swallowed around the lump in his throat and laughed nervously, "haven't told anyone."

Donna nodded and pushed up from her chair, walking around the desk and leaning against it to stare down at Jared. "It's important to have someone to talk to about these things. And you know you can come to me with anything right? Love... it's a complicated thing, we've all been there," she smiled softly at him and reached out to squeeze his shoulder. "I'm not just your partner, I'm your friend and I know you don't have many of those here so please, feel free."

Jared kept his eyes glued to the floor, "it's just... you know, what kind of life can you give someone as a cop. And, there were issues. We couldn't... well, we just couldn't let people know and it didn't seem fair." Jared wasn't sure why it was suddenly all coming out but it was like a flood, "he's younger, you know?" He glanced up at Donna and smiled, "sweet and has a lot of stuff ahead of him. Just didn't seem right." He groaned and ran a hand through his hair nervously. "Shit, Donna... I'm sorry. You've got enough to worry about, I'm fine, really. Just... overtired and too much coffee." He held up the cup and slid it back onto her desk.

Smiling softly Donna shook her head, "maybe you were underestimating things. I was fourteen the first time I met my husband, and well," Donna blushed slightly and shrugged. "He was twenty one. Sometimes those things just happen. But you're a smart guy Jared. So if you think you made the right decision, well I'm sure you thought long and hard about it. Just remember that if you do find someone, and you love him and feel that something special, then you can always make it work. Relationships as a cop are harder; trust me I was married to a lawyer. Now _that's_ an impossible relationship," she chuckled and patted Jared's shoulder once more. "We cops tend to think with our mind too much sometimes. Be careful. You're young too."

Nodding Jared smiled warmly, "yeah, well... it's done now. Some things you can't take back." He huffed out a laugh. "We're quite a pair today... _God_ I should just go home, get some sleep. You good here?" He pushed up from the chair and headed back toward the door.

"Yeah I'm just gonna finish up a few things. I'll be heading home soon. See you tomorrow," Donna turned from him, heading back around her desk.

The idea sort of grew out of loneliness. Over two weeks without Jensen was taking its toll on Jared. The art school thing, the talk with Donna, all of it conspired against him. Suddenly he found himself thinking about Jensen all the time again. Driving back to the precinct in the early afternoon he realized that it was the time that Jensen normally walked home from school. He'd picked Jensen up before on his way home, knew the route like the back of his hand. He drove until he was a few blocks from Jensen's house, pulled over and got out of his truck. It was cool out, but he didn't mind, the fresh air was nice. Hopping up onto the closest wall, he waited, straightening his tie and fussing with his jacket.

It was easy to pick out Jensen's frame long before he was close enough to see Jared. _God_ , seeing him made Jared's heart race a little. He fought the impulse to rush back to his truck and drive off and was still sitting there when Jensen finally saw him. Holding up his hand, he managed a slight wave and hopped down off the wall. "Hi... Jensen."

Jensen froze mid step, eyes wide, fingers curled around his backpack straps. He'd already been having a shit day, shit couple of weeks really, and he wasn't sure if he could handle seeing Jared right now. "What do you want?" He asked, voice cold as he stared at the man, sharp pain stinging directly into his heart.

Nervous, Jared reached up and loosened his tie. "I was... I was thinking about you. Your Mom said you... don't want to go to art school..." he looked down at Jensen's sneakers. His heart was beating out of his chest.

Scoffing in annoyance, Jensen turned his head to the side and blew out a long breath. "Yeah well, it's none of your business," he sucked the breath back in, willing back tears so Jared wouldn't see how affected he was by just seeing him.

Flinching at the words Jared nodded. "I..I know. I just... well, you're," he sighed, "you're an amazing artist Jensen. The drawings you did..." He took a step closer trying to get Jensen to look at him, just wanted to see his eyes so he could see if Jensen was going to be okay. "They were beautiful, so real, you really captured the... emotions..." His fingers twitched slightly, "Jen... I miss you." He reached out for Jensen's hand.

"Stop," Jensen hissed, stepping back with wide eyes and a trembling lip. "Y-you... you don't get to do this. You don't get to just break my heart and come back here and pretend to care. Just... leave me alone," he pulled in on himself, swiping angrily at the tears on his face.

Sucking in a deep breath Jared held it for a few moments and stuffed his hands in his pockets. "You... you're right. I'm sorry. Just think about the school thing." He turned and started to walk away before pausing for a moment, "but I wasn't pretending," he almost whispered before moving back to his truck and opening the door. He started the truck as fast as he could and pulled away from the curb quickly before Jensen could see how upset he was. He'd been right after all; some things just couldn't be fixed.

Jensen stared after the truck, hating himself for making Jared go away. He should have just stepped forward and thrown his arms around him like he wanted to so badly. When he'd stepped out of his last class and seen the word 'fag' spray painted on his locker he had thought this day couldn't get any worse and here he was, feeling hopelessly raw. "Fuck," he gasped and forced himself to start walking once more, the chill of the winter afternoon seeping through his too thin coat.

Tires screeched from down the road and Jensen sighed, not even having to look back to know whose truck they belonged too. Ever since he'd come out to a few friends at the beginning of the year things had changed. He'd never been popular but he'd skirted along the edges and stayed safely invisible. Being pretty much the only gay kid in school – or, at least, the only _out_ one - was like painting a target on his forehead.

"Hey fag," one of the jocks from the truck yelled, throwing a beer can at him and Jensen could hear the echoing laugh from the others in the truck.

Jensen kept his head forward, blood boiling from the mixture of everything this day, and the ones before this, too much for any average adult to handle. And Jensen was only seventeen.

"Jennnnny," the jock sang out, word slightly slurred. "What's the matter? Can't get anyone to let you suck their dick Jenny? No one wants the disgusting little homo."

"Shut up," Jensen snapped, nostrils flaring. He tried to remember what his mom had said when he'd talked to her a few months ago about these assholes. Ignore them; they won't keep bugging you if you pretend like it doesn't bother you.

"Aww maybe your issue is you wanna suck _my_ dick," the jock snorted and reached back in the truck, coming up a moment later with another can to throw at him.

This one was half full and it splashed over Jensen's pants. That was the last straw and Jensen snapped, turning toward the truck that had been slowly trailing along beside him. He stalked toward the window and curled his fingers tightly around the jocks shirt, dragging him forward and just stopping short of smashing their lips together. "Maybe that's your issue. All you can think about is me sucking your dick. I bet you dream about it all the time. Go ahead, tell your friends how much you _want me_."

The truck screeched to a halt and Jensen was knocked back by the passenger door behind shoved roughly open. "You fucking sick little..." the jock's face was red enough to match the letter jacket he wore, eyes wide, fist lifted up.

Jensen braced himself for the blow but was thankfully saved by another car turning onto the street. In a flash Jensen was being shoved back as the jocks clambered back into their truck. "This isn't done," the boy hissed in warning before the tires were squealing once more as the truck peeled off down the street.

It took Jensen several minutes to get his body to stop shaking long enough to continue his walk home. There was a sinking feeling of doom in the pit of his stomach that Jensen couldn't shake for the rest of the night.

"Jensen, can you stay for a minute?" Donna asked her son as he rose from the kitchen table.

Freezing in his steps Jensen frowned and slowly turned back to her, eyes lingering on the basement door for a moment before looking back at her. "What's up?"

"I got a call from your principal today," she said softly and frowned when Jensen flinched at her words. "Honey... why didn't you tell me they were spray painting your locker?"

"You said not to let it affect me," Jensen shrugged and stuffed his hands in his pocket. "Besides, what were you going to do about it? The last thing I need is my cop mom to show up in my defense. That'll just make it worse." Jensen didn't want to think about those stupid jocks. He didn't want to _think_ and he wished there was just some way to turn off his brain for the rest of his life. "It's fine. They got detention because they got caught. Justice served."

Donna pulled out a chair and dropped down, gesturing for Jensen to take the other one. "Why don't you talk to me anymore?"

Jensen sighed and considered not taking the seat but his mother's narrowed eyes told him there was no getting out of this. His fingers twitched up to the pendant tucked under his shirt before he pulled out the chair and sat. "You won't understand."

"Try me, you might be surprised to learn what I can understand," Donna said softly, leaning toward her son with sad eyes.

The last thing Jensen wanted to deal with on top of everything was making his mom sad so he wracked his brain, trying to think of a way to give her what she wanted without giving away too much. Jared would flat out hate him if he told his mom the truth. Jensen could handle Jared not wanting to be with him - somehow - but he couldn't handle the man _hating_ him. "It's... about a guy."

Donna pursed her lips and nodded slowly, "I was kind of guessing that." When Jensen's eyes shot up to her she smiled softly and shrugged, "I'm not just your mom Jensen, I do fall in love."

"Well just with dad and that happened like, _forever_ ago," Jensen snorted and shook his head. "And dad's a guy, you're a girl. So your love doesn't come with a whole shit-"

"Jensen, language," Donna corrected and leaned forward, taking on a comforting and understanding pose. "And no, I didn't have to deal with being attracted to people of the same sex but our relationship had its own slew of complications and you know that."

"Yeah," Jensen nodded slowly, not bothering to give any indication by how similar a lot of their complications were. "Well... he dumped me," Jensen shrugged, trying to make it sound more casual then it felt. Just saying the words made him want to curl up in a little ball on his mom's lap like he might have done when he was a little kid and fell and hurt himself. "Guess our complications were just too many."

Donna nodded silently, reaching out to smooth a hand down Jensen's arm. "I'm sorry honey. It's always hard, especially with high school romances. But there will be other guys, when you get out in the real world you'll find a whole slew of people interested in you."

Jensen shook his head roughly, wiping angrily at his cheeks. It seemed like all he knew how to do recently was cry. "It wasn't some high school romance mom. It was more than that. _He_ was more than that," his eyes lifted to her, fluttering rapidly to clear the tears. "I... I loved him mom. I do love him still. And it's not _fair_ because he doesn't even want to be with me but then he just shows up and says that he misses me and what am I suppose to say to something like that? Cause of course I miss him and I just want him to hold me and kiss me and make this pain go away but he doesn't _want_ me," he couldn't seem to stop the words from tumbling out of his mouth, the weight on his shoulders felt like it was lifting slightly even as his heart clenched. Saying those words, that Jared didn't want him, made them feel so much more real.

In the next moment Donna was up off her chair and pulling Jensen into her arms, rocking him slowly against her chest. "Shh, it's okay honey, it's gonna be okay," she whispered into the side of his face, hand stroking slowly through his hair.

Jensen clung to his mom in a way he hadn't done since his dad died so many years ago. He sobbed into her shoulder, vaguely wondering how many tears a person could cry until they just went away. Jensen was fairly certain he'd cried enough in the past two weeks to fill up a swimming pool, possibly a small lake. "Why does it have to be like this?" He mumbled into his mom's shirt, sniffing loudly as he pulled back. "I get why he's freaked cause there's... there's stuff and yeah it makes sense but... but he doesn't have to just... we could..." Jensen shrugged, unable to explain it to her without giving any more details.

Donna sighed softly and dragged her thumb across Jensen's cheek to swipe at tears. "Jen... sometimes you just have to trust people's decisions..." she smiled softly and continued her gently, comforting strokes on his skin. "Do I know this guy? I could always go over and threaten him for you if you want."

Despite the tears Jensen let out a half chuckle and shook his head, not answering in any way. "What does it mean?" He asked quietly after a few moments when he felt like he had more control of himself. "That he says he misses me? Do you... do you think he wants to try again? Or do you think he was just trying to be nice because he's super sweet like that?"

"Well..." Donna frowned and shook her head, "Jen, I know you love this guy but you need to respect his decision. Especially if it's as complicated as you say it is."

It wasn't the answer Jensen wanted to hear and he stepped back, nodding slowly. "O-okay... I think I just want to be alone for awhile," he gestured toward the basement door, sliding back.

"Jensen?" Donna called out before he could start down the stairs. When he turned back to her she dropped her gaze and wet her lips before asking, "did you two... have sex?"

" _Mom_ ," Jensen whined, flinching at the question and shaking his head. "God, you totally don't get to know about that type of stuff."

"I have a right to know," Donna reasoned, slight smile tilting her lips up.

Jensen scoffed and leaned against the door jam. "What does it matter? You knew Josh was sleeping with Karen when he was like, sixteen. So because I'm gay it matters more?" Jensen huffed, hand resting against his hip in an all too feminine form of indignation.

Donna rolled her eyes and laughed, "calm down Jensen, it's not because your gay. Josh was honest with me when I asked and I expect the same from you okay? So... did you two have sex?"

Jensen's eyes darted to the side for a moment before he sighed and shook his head. "No. We fooled around a little but no... no sex. He wouldn't..." Jensen shrugged and pulled the door open. "Satisfied?"

Smiling softly, Donna nodded. "Goodnight."

"Night," Jensen mumbled, face still red from embarrassment. He jogged down the stairs and fell heavily onto his bed, sighing. Their conversation was swirling through his mind and Jensen couldn't understand what to make of things. Clearly his mom agreed with Jared without even knowing anything about the situation. Maybe Jensen just was too young to understand it all.

Rolling over to his desk Jensen snatched up his cell phone and scrolled through the contacts to Jared's name. He hadn't been strong enough to delete it yet. Lips thinning out in a line Jensen started up a new text.

 **Jensen:** _Miss you too_

Several hours later when he went to bed, Jensen stared at the blank screen of his phone. It didn't really surprise him that Jared didn't text back, but that certainly didn't mean it was any easier to handle. Maybe it just meant Jensen was getting used to the hollow sort of pain in him.


	4. Chapter 4

By the time the Friday rolled around, Jensen was looking forward to a weekend of sitting around and doing nothing. Chris had tried to talk him into hanging out but their friendship had altered quite a bit in the time that Jensen had been seeing Jared, since Jensen couldn't confide in Chris what was happening, and Jensen no longer felt that familiar friendship comfort. If he was honest, Jensen was pretty sure it had all changed when he admitted his preference for guys. Chris wasn't anything like those asshole jocks who picked on him but it had to be a little weird to know the guy you'd grown up with - who'd seen you naked on more than one occasion, not to mention the whole jack off thing - was gay. Jensen understood his discomfort and it was just another thing added to the list of reasons why Jensen's life kind of sucked. A lot.

For the good majority of the past week Jensen found himself sidestepping jocks, always seeming to appear in his path as he traveled from one class to the next, leering at him across the lunch room. They wouldn't do anything to harm him on campus, they weren't _that_ dumb, but it was Friday and they never had practice those days because there were generally games on Saturday and Jensen had a pretty bad feeling about how things might go after school. When the final bell ring he hovered too long by his locker, hoping the jocks would clear off to whatever stupid thing they did after school and he could walk home in peace. To be extra safe he wanted until the janitor was coming down the hall, a full thirty minutes after the bell, before heading out into the chilly afternoon.

As was pretty typical of Colorado, what started out as a mildly sunny, potential nice winter day was now cloudy, the threat of snow hovering in the air like little drops of dew. Jensen pulled in a long breath of the crisp air, digging his hands into his pockets and ducking his head as he started off down the path.

Halfway home he heard it, the screech of tires, and his heart kick started into overtime. _Detention_. Jensen had completely forgotten the jocks had been forced to stay after. He'd stalled for safety and only succeeded in throwing himself in the lion's den. They must have seen him leaving and bolted out the door for their revenge. Jensen could tell the truck was rapidly approaching and he panicked for a moment before taking off at a full sprint.

Snow was falling around him now, the air cold enough to make the sidewalk slick beneath his tennis shoes and Jensen skid, feet sailing up as he crashed down hard onto his ass. " _Fuck_ ," he gasped in pain, eyes squeezing shut. Then snapping open as the sound of a truck door slamming brought to him the realization that he'd failed in his attempt to escape from the boys.

"Poor. Little. Jenny," the jock from before, Jensen thought his name might be Daniel but he wasn't completely sure – they were all the same person in his mind, walked toward him with a sway to his hips that told Jensen he was anything but sympathetic. "Hope you can still get fucked in your ass if it's broken."

"Why? You offering?" Jensen snapped, regretting the words the moment they left his lips.

The jock hissed and drew back, lunging forward a moment later to tug Jensen up by his shirt and spit in his face. "Disgusting faggot. We should do the world a favor and send you to hell right now."

Jensen's heart was hammering so hard in his chest he thought the boy might literally do that right then and there, kill Jensen with the cold, disgusted hatred. Because he was the child of a cop, Jensen wasn't completely useless. Once more instinct had him reacting, kicking his leg up hard to connect with the jock's groin before he turned and bolted up the sidewalk, not bothering to see if he'd bought himself any time.

The problem was, Jensen hadn't taken a PE class since the required one freshmen year. And though he wasn't out of shape, he wasn't anything compared to a pack of football players who knew how to run in the fresh snow, who'd spent their whole high school career bulking up. Jensen was down within moments; face cracking hard on the cement, driven forward by a large hand on his skull.

He sucked in a sharp breath as a shoe connected with his side, body jerking together in pain, lurching back a moment later as another shoe landed into the small of his back. Wet and grimy snow from the sidewalk smeared into his face for a moment before the first jock, obviously more recovered from his kick, pulled him up by the collar. "You're gonna pay for that fuckin' fag," he spat and Jensen saw a flash of a clenched fist before pain split across his face.

Jensen lost track of the blows, body twisting and writhing, blood flowing down his throat and across his face. He sobbed out with the pain, tried to crawl away, but a large hand was curling around his leg and dragging him back. _I'm gonna die_ he thought desperately, trying and failing once more to make an escape. _They're going to kill me and my mom and my sister will be alone. And Jared will never know that I don't hate him. That I still love him._

A loud scream sounded from somewhere far away and Jensen was pretty sure he dreamed it but the blows stopped so he didn't mind. Instead he relaxed down into the cement, body numb and cold and the last thing he could think before he slipped into unconsciousness was the hope that he'd just die quick and get it over with. It would be easiest on everyone.

Jared was typing up a report; trying to decipher his own field notes and letting out the occasional swear word. It was an average evening for him of late. Leaning back in his chair he kicked his feet up onto his desk and closed his eyes for a few moments. Sometimes the computer screen started to make his head ache. Donna and he were working late _again_ , it seemed like every case they were working was winding up at the same time - leaving them with tons of paperwork - Jared's least favorite part of the job.

"Jared!" Donna called loudly, banging open her office, face pale. "Come on. Now." She snapped, tugging on her coat and already heading for the exit.

Wobbling on his chair, nearly falling off and barely recovering Jared sprang up and was half way to the door before managing to speak. "What? What's wrong? Donna?" He rushed to keep up with her, stumbling slightly as they rounded the corner to the outside door.

Donna's hand shook as she threw keys at him, heading for their police car. "It's Jensen," she gasped softly, stopping mid step and covering her mouth. "Oh god." Her shoulders shook as she struggled to get control over the emotions sweeping through her.

Snatching the keys out of the air Jared stepped toward her, "Jesus, Donna, what?" His heart slowed like everything around him was suddenly buried in sludge, everything slowing to a halt waiting for her answer.

"Some boys caught up with him on his walk home," she stared hard at the ground before looking up at Jared with watery eyes. "They... they beat him. The hospital said he's in really bad shap-" she choked on the word, half stepping toward Jared with wide eyes, losing grips on her usual cop persona.

Jared closed the distance between them and slid his arm around her tugging her toward the car. The words reverberated through his head. Jensen hurt. The look on Donna's face was the closest thing to sheer terror that Jared had ever seen. He stumbled forward, urging his body into motion as his brain tried to shut him down. "I'll get us there, Donna, come on." He took her hand as he opened the car door and helped her in.

He started the car, hand shaking on the keys and pulled out of the parking lot with the lights and siren on. He had no idea what to say, and frankly, he was afraid that he'd say something stupid, something like _Fuck, don't let him die before I tell him..._. Curling his fingers over the wheel so tight it hurt he reached over and squeezed Donna's shoulder.

"He's in ICU," she informed, words shaky. "I guess... it happened an hour or so ago but... they've been... he was in surgery. Is in. I don't know. I can't..." she shook her head roughly and pulled out her phone. "I have to call a sitter. Mackenzie is all alone. God she must be terrified. Maybe I should call her first. But fuck what would I say to her I..." She looked over at Jared with wide eyes. "They said he's crit- critical. That he might not ma..." once more she choked on the words, cell phone trembling in her hand.

Jared's heart pinched sharply with pain and he rubbed at his forehead willing himself to stay calm. He could feel the bile starting to rise in his throat. _No_. "He'll be okay. He'll _be_ okay," he blew out a shaky breath. "He's strong Donna, young and strong." He slammed his fist against the steering wheel. "Fuckers... I will _fucking_ kill them..." He glanced at Donna and shook his head, "s..sorry... I'm... it's just. He's... we're almost there."

Donna stared at him for a long moment before blowing out a quiet breath and nodding, pulling open her phone to scroll through the contacts. By the time they arrived at the hospital she'd explained the gist of the situation to the sitter, who assured her she'd be with Mackenzie within minutes. Deciding it was best to call her daughter after she had some information, she glanced at Jared as they pulled up to the hospital entrance. "You... really love him huh?" She asked quietly, wiping at her face with her fingers.

For the second time that evening Jared's heart practically stopped. He turned to Donna, mouth opening and closing silently for a few moments. His eyes welled with tears and he gritted his teeth. "I swear to God," he spoke quickly, "I'll never go near him again after this... just don't keep me away from him right now." The tears spilled down over his cheeks and he locked his eyes with hers, pleading with his gaze. Swallowing he groaned softly, "I love him so much it hurts, Donna."

Reaching out Donna laid her hand on his cheek for a moment before pursing his lips and nodding. "We'll talk about this later. Come on," she turned and pushed open the passenger door, thankful for the cop car that they could leave just outside the front entrance without an issue. Donna waited for Jared to turn off the car and lock it before they headed inside for the front desk. The nurse instantly led her in back, only allowing Jared to come when Donna insisted upon it, saying a quiet, "he's family."

"They just now brought him out of surgery," the nurse explained as they were introduced to her just inside the ICU doors. "He's on heavy meds now so he won't be up for awhile but..." she stopped outside a door, turning to them both and holding out an arm to stop Donna from pulling the door open. "He's severely bruised, broken arm. Broken tailbone and three broken ribs. We had to give him blood but at this point he's stable. I'll let the doctor know you're here so she can come talk to you okay?"

Donna nodded and stepped back as the nurse opened the door. Her eyes flicked over to Jared before she reached out for his hand and let him lead her inside the room, gasping softly at Jensen's appearance on the bed.

The room was entirely too bright and there were things beeping and lights were flashing on and off. Jared's eyes moved over the bed to Jensen's face. The shock of seeing Jensen like this hit Jared like a punch in his stomach. His shoulders curled forward and he pressed his hand over his mouth for a few moments, blinking rapidly. Rubbing his hand over his eyes he blew out a slow breath. Gripping Donna's hand tighter he pulled her closer to the bed. Jensen looked so small, so frail; his eyes were swollen shut, cheek already bruising and still seeping blood. There were IV's in both arms, and they were giving him oxygen. His broken arm was in a splint, his fingers swollen were they poked out the end of the bandages. " _Jesus_..." Jared whispered. They walked up to the side of the bed and Jared stepped back to give Donna room. His eyes dragged down Jensen's face looking for some sign of life.

"Oh..." Donna whispered, hand reaching out to gently caress the wisps of hair barely touching Jensen's forehead. "My baby..." she sniffed loudly and turned from him, eyes lifting up the ceiling. "I want those kids dead," she practically growled, looking at Jared. "We need to find out what's been done so far. If Jensen di-" she cut herself off with a sharp shake of her head. "I should be doing something. I should call Josh, he needs to be here... and Mackenzie, she's probably scared out of her mind and I..."

Jared grabbed Donna's shoulder, "Hey, Donna, he's okay right now. Look at him. He's breathing, he's gonna be alright." He leaned forward and kissed the top of her head, "I know it," he whispered. "Why don't you," he turned her and ducked his head down so he could look into her eyes, "Call Josh tell him to head out, he can pick up Mack on the way here, she'll be alright that long." He nodded at her, "okay? I'll stay with Jensen."

"Okay," Donna nodded and stepped toward the door. "If the doctor comes, tell her I'll be back soon. I know how doctor's are so if she needs to just give you a report I trust you to remember the details to relay back to me," she pulled her cell phone from her pocket and didn't wait for Jared to answer before heading out the door.

Moving slowly around the bed, Jared sank down into the chair by Jensen's bed. Reaching out he twined his finger with Jensen's, his uninjured hand was even bruised and Jared winced. Sliding to the edge of the chair he pulled Jensen's hand up to his mouth and kissed each finger gently. "Jensen," he spoke softly and leaned in closer to Jensen's ear, "I'm here. It's Jared." A muscle was twitching in his jaw and he shoved his hair back off his face. "Jensen, you listen to me okay? I'm _so_ sorry. I have never been more wrong about anything in my life. Nothing is more important than you. No job... nothing." He wiped at the tears that were welling once more in his eyes, "I dunno if you can hear me - but I want you to give me a second chance. P..Please. So you... you get better and I'm gonna be here okay?" Bringing Jensen's hand up to his mouth once more Jared closed his eyes.

Donna arrived back in time to catch the doctor and they talked quietly for awhile over the situation. She was confident that Jensen was going to be okay but they would have to wait until he woke to find out about any possible brain damage. Fortunately it appeared the boys didn't have any weapons and with the lack of bruising along the skull the doctor felt confident enough to give him eight five percent chance of no brain damage. The news didn't exactly cheer Donna of Jared up but at this point they were willing to take what little things they could.

It took around two hours for Josh to show up with Mackenzie, which was almost for the best since most of the evening activity of the ICU had trickled down. Mackenzie had to be stopped before she tried to climb up in bed with Jensen and Donna held her in her lap while Josh talked to Jared, getting all the information the doctor had shared. They stayed for less than an hour, not wanting to overwhelm Mackenzie with too much, and Donna walked them both to their car, leaving Jared once more to look after Jensen.

Donna returned twenty minutes later with two cups of coffee on a tray along with some snack foods she'd gotten from the vending machine. She glanced at Jared in the chair beside Jensen's bed before pulling up her own beside him and offering him one of the coffees and a package of chips. "Gotta try and eat something," she muttered, though she sounded a little more like she was trying to convince herself then Jared.

Reaching out he grabbed a coffee and put it on the night stand. "I should probably..." Jared looked down at his hands "go..." He rubbed the back of his neck. Donna had been more than generous, forgiving, letting him stay until they all knew that there was a good chance that Jensen was going to be okay. Jared didn't want to push his luck.

"That what you wanna do?" She asked softly, eyes staying on Jensen's form as she sipped from her coffee.

"No," Jared's voice was soft, "I just... I owe you a really big apology or... something. I don't even know what. I didn't... he and I didn't..." Jared rubbed his hand down his face. What the hell was he supposed to tell her? How could he possibly make this okay? "I didn't mean for it to happen. He..." Jared laughed softly, "he was so persistent and I... he's amazing. One of the most amazing people I've ever met." Blowing out a breath he reached out and picked up Jensen's hand again. "Do you hate me?"

Donna blew out a long breath and fixed her eyes on Jared's hand holding Jensen's. "I don't. Not hate at least," she glanced over at Jared and shrugged. "I'm a little mad. But probably not for the reason you think. You and he both should have discussed this with me a long time ago. How long has it been going on? Or how long was it?"

"Four months or so, and then over Christmas I just realized that I was falling, well..." He rubbed his thumb over the back of Jensen's hand. "I told him we couldn't see each other anymore. Thought I was doing the right thing, I couldn't figure out how to fix it - how to talk to you when things had already gone so far. And, I really thought - he might be better off, you know?" He turned to look at Donna, eyes wide and watery. "Then I talked to you ... and I just wanted him back...." he choked off a sob and ran his hand through his hair nervously turning away from her.

Reaching out Donna laid her hand on Jared's back and circled slowly. "He and I talked about you two," she couldn't help a small chuckle when Jared's head shot toward her. "Well not exactly _you_ but I had my suspicions. I'm not the best detective in the State for nothing," she smiled softly and tucked a strand of hair behind Jared's ear. "I'm not saying that you and he are the wisest choice, but... I know my Jensen and he is so very madly in love with you. I guess I didn't realize it until you two broke up but the past few months he's been so happy. I haven't seen that since before his father passed away. And... if you're the one to make him that way... well who am I to stand in between that? Besides, he'll be moving out of my house in less than six months and I'd rather not have him hating me because I wouldn't allow you two to date."

Jared smiled sadly, a little overwhelmed by everything. "He wasn't very happy with me... the last time I saw him. Maybe it's for the best... I mean you're right it was never a wise choice. He's young and _fuckin'_ perfect." His eyes darted to Donna's for a moment, "Sorry. And, I'm a cop and I'm never home... just wanted him to be happy."

Donna sighed heavily and shook her head, "look I'm not gonna sit here and convince you to date my son but damnit Jared you make a choice. Because if you decide not to. If you want to play into all those excuses, then you get the hell out of here because I don't want him to see you when he wakes up know he's just gonna get his spirits crushed again." She narrowed her eyes at him before continuing, "why don't you go home, get some sleep. Think it over real hard. If you come back tomorrow then I'll know your choice and we'll lay out some ground rules. If not then, that's it. You leave him be for good okay?"

"Do I have to sleep on it? To tell you I mean?" Jared leaned forward staring up at Jensen's face.

"Not if you're sure about your decision," her voice softened slightly, eying Jared.

"If he'll forgive me, I'll spend the rest of my life making it up to him." Jared shifted closer to the bed so he could lay his head by Jensen's hand. He was so _fucking_ exhausted he could barely think. "And, no matter how much respect I have for you, Donna, you couldn't get me out of this room with a crowbar."

With a soft chuckle Donna nodded and settled back in her chair. "Well then ground rules it is. I want you to stick to the no sex thing. At least until he's eighteen then I have no say over it. And you can come over to see him but no more of these all evenings spent together at your place thing," she smiled at Jared and pointed to herself. "Detective. I put the pieces together. Now, I will allow you two to be in his room downstairs but I expect you to be on your best behavior. If I find out you've... crossed that line... I'll make you spend all your dates on the couch with Mack and I watching chick flicks okay?" She met Jared's gaze to let him know she was serious. "And by line I mean, all the way. I know Jensen mentioned... well... I don't need details. But I think you get what I'm talking about."

Nodding, Jared smiled slightly as he slid his arm under his head. "Thank you." There were a thousand other things he could say, but at this point, Jared figured that silence might make more sense. He was still finding it hard to believe that Donna didn't want to kill him... or worse.

"You're welcome," she pushed up from the chair and stretched her back with raised arms. "This is all of course assuming Jensen will forgive you... which, judging from out last conversation," she shrugged slightly and smiled. "I'm gonna go see about getting one of those cots to lie down in. I don't imagine you'll be moving." Turning from him she headed for the door, hesitating after a moment, "you know Jared, of all the guys he could have dated. I'm actually glad it's you," she said softly, throwing a smile over her shoulder at him before heading out of the room.

Jared shifted his chair over so it was flush against the side of the bed, covered himself with his suit jacket, threaded his fingers through Jensen's and got as comfortable as he could. He was asleep before Donna returned to the room.

There was an odd sort of beeping echoing vaguely in the back of his mind and Jensen tried to reach at it, assuming his alarm was going off. But it didn't seem like his alarm was within reach or something... actually, if he thought about it Jensen felt a little like it was his arm that wouldn't move. Everything felt a little fuzzy and the pulsing in his brain seemed to be in time with a steady pulsing against his senses. Underneath all of that there was definitely something warm crawling up his arm. Fingers. Definitely fingers laced with his. Thick and long and... _familiar_. Jensen's heart quickened and so did the beeping which was pretty damn weird.

"Wha..." he whispered as he worked his eyes open. They were heavy and crusty and Jensen was confused. His eyes slid around the bright white of the hospital room he was in, pieces of the puzzle jamming together with uncomfortable clarity.

"Jensen?" The distinctly worried whisper of his mother's voice had him turning slightly, struggling to sit up in hopes it would make things straighten out. "Oh honey try not to move too much," she insisted and stepped forward, eyes wide. "What do you need? Are you thirsty?"

Testing his voice once more, Jensen realized his throat was incredibly dry and burned slightly. So he nodded to her and watched as she hurried out of the room to get some water. Once she'd disappeared he suddenly remembered the warm flesh and his eyes darted down to his arms. His left was in some type of sling thing but his _right_ was connected to... "Jared..." he whispered, fingers tightening almost on instinct. The man was slouched in a very uncomfortable looking way on the chair, half covered by his coat. Jensen's eyebrows drew together, sliding back almost instantly at the pain that sparked up in him.

"He's been here the whole time," Donna said softly as she returned with a nurse and pitcher of water.

The nurse smiled a greeting at Jensen before walking to his IV, "I'm gonna give you a little more pain medicine okay Jensen? It should kick in within minutes so if you're still hurting in ten minutes or so you let me know and I'll give you a little more okay?"

Jensen nodded and watched her go before looking back at his mom, who was now standing on his free side, extending a glass of water and a straw. "Jensen honey, do you remember what happened?"

Jensen hadn't really been thinking about it but now as he searched his memory he flinched and dropped his eyes, "I'm sorry... I didn't listen to your rules. I... I snapped back at them and they... who saved me? Am I... okay?" Jensen twitched his body experimentally, trying to figure out if he could move every part of him. His eyes drifted to Jared once more and he wondered why his mom was acting like Jared wasn't as pressed up to his side as he could be and holding his hand.

"Oh honey, that... it's not your fault. You have a broken arm, some ribs, and your tailbone. Lots of bruises. But you're gonna be okay. Those boys..." Donna's jaw clenched and Jensen looked toward her. "They'll get theirs."

Despite the flinch at hearing what was exactly wrong with him Jensen snorted a quiet laugh, "gonna teach them a lesson with your gun?"

"Don't mock me," Donna gasped in fake offense, reaching out to gently touch Jensen's cheek.

"Mom... why is he here?" Jensen's eyes drifted to Jared and back to his mom, slightly wide. The pain was giving way to a pleasant tingling and he shifted on the mattress, getting as comfortable as possible.

"Like I said, he's been here the whole time," she also looked at Jared, small smile on her face. "I know about the two of you. I actually have for awhile now. And it's okay," she insisted as Jensen's eyes shot toward her. "Him and I have talked. Once you... if you two decide to get back together... then you and I will have the same talk okay? Once you're up to it. But right now you focus on getting better."

Jensen gaped at her for a moment before nodding, "yeah okay." He wanted to ask her for more information, wanted to know what she meant by _it's okay_ and _if you two decide to get back together_. Was that a possibility? "Mom you look... really tired," Jensen said softly. Translation, she looked like shit. "You should... oh my god Mack. Is she okay?" His eyes widened slightly and he worked to keep his voice quiet as Jared stirred on the chair.

"Josh came up," Donna informed her son and shifted forward to press a small kiss to Jensen's cheek, "Now that you're awake and I've had a chance to see that, I think I will head home for a couple hours. I need to go by the station to file an official report against the boys who did this to you. But I'll be back as soon as possible I just need to make sure your sister is okay and-"

"Mom," Jensen interrupted her, small smile on his face. "It's okay. I'm..." his eyes slid to Jared before turning back to her, "I'm not alone. And I know you've got other responsibilities. I'd say it's pretty safe to say I'm not going anywhere."

Donna slid forward and stroked a hand through Jensen's hair before leaning in to press a few kisses to his temple. "Don't overexert yourself with your Jared conversation okay? You guys can wait to figure things out. What's most important now is your health."

"I... okay," Jensen nodded, not dwelling too much thought on that subject at the moment. His mind wasn't quite up to processing it currently.

"Are you okay with me going? Maybe I should stay..." she worried her lower lip between her teeth.

"Mom, it's okay, go rest. Shower. Do all your stuff," Jensen insisted softly. "I'm gonna pass out again soon so all you'd be doing here is watching me sleep which is... creepy."

Donna chuckled and kissed his temple once again before stepping away, "tell that to Jared."

A few minutes later Jensen was watching the door close behind his mom before his eyes drifted back to Jared. He was frankly a little surprised the man had slept through the whole interaction but he had this feeling that Jared was probably pretty exhausted when he finally did pass out the night before. Jensen was getting sleepy and considered just drifting off again but the fear that Jared wouldn't be there when he woke up was too strong. "Jared..." he said softly and squeezed at the fingers in his grip, blinking slowly.

Jared's foot slipped off the bed frame, jolting his body and he lurched forward. "Jensen..." he murmured. Groaning, he rubbed at his eyes with his free hand, yawned and then realized where he was. His head whipped to the side, eyes still blinking sleepily. "Jensen?" He managed to focus his eyes on the young man's face, his _open_ eyes. "You're awake," he whispered. Shifting quickly Jared shook his head and scrubbed a hand over his face, "gotta get Donna..." His heart soared, _God_ he was awake.

"She just left," Jensen said softly, watching Jared's hand move over his face. He cleared his throat and swallowed thickly, thinking he should have asked for his mother to give him the cup. Only then he'd have to remove his hand from Jared's which wasn't really appealing. "Could you... water?" He looked toward the cup resting on the table on the other side of the bed, just out of hands reach.

Jared had never been happier to hear anyone speak in his life. " _Shit_ , yeah... m'sorry," Jared's voice was thick with sleep and emotion. He looked at the cup of water on the other side of the bed then squeezed Jensen's hand gently. There was no way in _hell_ he was letting go until Jensen asked him to. Standing he sat gently on the side of the bed and reached across Jensen to get the glass. "Here, you need help," he held the glass, nervous, wondering if Jensen was even okay with him being there.

"Yeah," Jensen nodded slowly, wetting his lips and smiling softly for a moment before Jared brought the glass to his lips. He pulled the water in, swirling it around his mouth. Jensen sighed softly as he settled back on the pillow, shifting to get comfortable once more. "I... why are you here?" He asked quietly, squeezing Jared's hand beneath his to let him know it was okay, that he just needed to know why.

"Because I love you." Jared could feel tears prickling behind his eyes and sighed. "And," he forced out a small laugh, "I was hoping if I was here while you were all confused from being hit on the head - that you might take me back and forget what an idiot I am?" Dropping his eyes to Jensen's hand, Jared cringed inwardly. He knew he didn't deserve a second chance after the way he'd hurt Jensen. "Jensen, I am more sorry for the things I said to you... than anything else I've ever done." Thumb rubbing softly over the back of the other man's hand he looked back up. Meeting Jensen's gaze, Jared smiled slightly and sniffed. "Y..You... want me to go?" He cleared his throat, "now I know you're okay..."

Jensen blinked at him with wide eyes, mouth slightly open as his mind process the words. "You... love me?" He asked quietly, turning to the heart monitor machine as it increased pace before looking back at Jared. "But... you said you didn't... I mean... didn't you..." Jensen blew out a long breath, eyes fluttering slightly. "Sorry, pain meds are making me a little slow. What does this mean?"

Jared's eyes darted over to the heart monitor. "I should leave you alone; we can talk about this later. S'too much right now." He stood and rubbed at his chest nervously, "you just... you rest…" He started to untangle his fingers from Jensen's.

"Wait, don't go," Jensen insisted, tightening his hold on Jared's hand. "I... we don't have to talk. Just... don't leave me alone," he whispered, vaguely registering the increase on the heart machine along with the clenching of his heart.

"Okay," Jared's voice was soft, "okay, I'll stay. You just need to rest..." he sat back down on the edge of the bed lifting Jensen's hand carefully and resting it on his thigh. His free hand drifted to Jensen's forehead and brushed his hair back. "You must be really tired, why don't you go to sleep? I'll be right here." Dropping his hand to Jensen's chest he rubbed softly, gentle circles that avoid his broken ribs.

Jensen soaked in comfort from the touch and squeezed Jared's thigh under his fingers. "Do I look like shit?" He asked with a small smile, relieved to know Jared wasn't going to be leaving.

Smile broadening Jared blinked slowly. "Right now? You're the best thing I've ever seen." His smile faded a little, "you're pretty bruised and your eye..." he lifted his hand to stroke Jensen's face softly, "is pretty swollen. Your pain meds working?" Brushing the back of his fingers up and down Jensen's cheek he settled himself on the bed. He really wanted to just gather Jensen into his arms and hold him, keep him safe. It was a new feeling for Jared - this protectiveness - and he found he didn't dislike it.

"Yeah," Jensen nodded and turned into Jared's touch. "Jared... you know I love you too right?" He blinked up at the man, slowly losing his battle with staying awake.

"I know," Jared whispered, "I know... just sleep. Not leavin', I promise." He smiled warmly, heart finally feeling like it might keep beating.

"Mmkay," Jensen murmured and smiled warmly at Jared before letting his eyes fall closed once more, settling in to go back to sleep and feeling a lot better about things.

Jared sat on the bed until his back ached then shifted back to the chair. The day passed in a steady stream of nurses, doctors, IV bags changing and medications administered. Jensen awoke a few times, smiled at Jared but didn't say much. Jared figured he was exhausted and needed all the rest he could get. It wasn't until Donna returned at lunch time, Mackenzie and Josh in tow that Jared finally pried his fingers from Jensen's. Standing, he stretched and was promptly informed by Donna that he smelled and looked terrible and should go and shower. If Jared had learned anything in his year of working with Donna it was that there wasn't much point in arguing with her. Eyes darting from one family member to another, Jared leaned down and pressed his lips softly to Jensen's then made a hasty exit.

The drive home felt strange, Jared's back was aching from sleeping in the chair all night but he felt a spark of hope for the first time in weeks. Jensen hadn't told him to get lost, pushing him away - in fact - Jared couldn't stop the sound of Jensen's words from running through his mind... _you know I love you too_. By the time Jared got home and wrestled his way through the front door of his condo his eyes were heavy. Without even bothering to shower, he yanked off his tie and crawled under his quilt fully dressed to sleep.

He only slept for a couple of hours. The thing was, the sleep Jared had _knowing_ the man he loved was going to be okay was a hell of a lot more restful than the sleep he'd had in the chair beside the hospital bed. As soon as he woke up, he climbed out of bed and peeled his suit off. A shower, some breakfast and two cups of coffee made Jared feel almost human again and he headed off to the precinct to check in. He spent the first half an hour at his desk passing on the news that Jensen was healing, Donna and her family were fine and reading up on the files for Jensen's case. Jared and Donna weren't on the case because of their obvious conflict of interest but there seemed to be no end of _accidental_ information left on Jared's desk. The young men who'd beaten Jensen had been identified by a witness, a man who'd run across the road to intervene when he'd seen Jensen was in trouble. They were being held at the station and it took a lot of control for Jared to stay away from the holding cells. He knew they'd be bailed out quickly seeing as they were mostly under eighteen but they had a long road ahead of them. Assault and Battery was a serious charge and in combination with the stigma of it being a hate crime - Jared had high hopes for their conviction and sentencing.

After he'd managed to stay at the office for about two hours, which he thought pretty remarkable seeing as it meant he'd been away from the hospital for most of the day, he packed up and headed back to Jensen's side.

The first time Jensen woke during the day and actually felt like he might want to be awake for awhile was disappointing, because a quick scan of the room told him Jared wasn't there and though he was pretty hyped up on pain meds, he was fairly certain Jared had been there earlier. His mom must have guessed what the expression on his face meant, judging from her knowing smile and the way she slid forward and stroked a hand through his hair. "I made him return to the real world for awhile but I'm sure he'll be back before too long," she said softly and poured Jensen some water. "The doctor said if you felt like being awake for awhile you could have some jello or soup, to test how food will settle. Does that sound good to you?"

With a soft smile Jensen nodded and shifted his hips on the mattress. "Could you raise the bed up a little more? So maybe I will stay awake longer?"

"Of course honey but you're still taking it easy okay? It's gonna get better but you're going to need to be patient," she smiled softly and adjusted Jensen's bed with the button on the remote.

Jensen chuckled softly and nodded, "oh come on mom, you know I'm the most patient guy _ever_."

"You are _so_ not the most patient guy ever," Jared said from the doorway of the room. He smiled and laughed softly.

Jensen's face lit up at seeing Jared and he scoffed, "I totally am. Clearly you have me confused with some other, drop dead gorgeous guy." He chuckled softly and lifted his hand for Jared. "C'mere."

Donna smiled at the two of them, shaking her head. "I'll give you both a minute."

Moving over to the bed Jared grabbed Jensen's hand, shrugged nervously then leaned down and pressed his lips to Jensen's. They were chapped, a scab had formed over a deep cut and Jensen, frankly, had horrible breath but it was pretty much the best kiss that Jared had ever had. Laughing softly Jared sat down in the chair Donna had vacated. "Man, your breath is nasty."

"You're so sweet," Jensen smiled at him, head tilting to the side. "I think my mom is getting me soup. Or jello. So..." he wet his lips and grimaced slightly. "I... want a mirror. Do you have one? I want to see what I look like."

"I don't have a mirror," Jared laughed again, "you look perfect. Seriously, you're gonna have one little scar on your lip," he tilted his head and ran a finger down Jensen's temple, "maybe one there. But... there's an upside." Jared's smile was warm, even a little mischievous.

Jensen's eyebrows lifted slightly, lip tugging up at the corner. "And what's that?" He could feel the familiar warmth that Jared always brought stirring up in him, making all the pain okay.

Leaning down, he whispered against Jensen's ear, "I think scars are sexy," he couldn't resist brushing his lips over the younger man's ear. Glancing at the heart monitor he laughed. "Wow," it was beeping considerably faster, "I'm good."

"Yeah well..." Jensen blushed softly and turned his face to Jared, unable to resist grinning at him even if it stretched the scab on his lip uncomfortably. "So... does this mean... are we... together again?" He asked with slightly wide eyes.

"If you... forgive me." There was still a lingering tinge of worry in Jared's chest. "Your Mom has rules..." he swallowed and looked up at those green eyes, holding Jensen's hand between both of his. "If you're not careful, you and I will end up watching a lot of ... chick flick movies - I believe was the threat, with her and Mack."

"That's totally a threat," Jensen nodded solemnly. "I do forgive you Jared. Do you forgive me for all the really shitty things I said? I... it was pretty immature of me," he smiled once more at Jared, eyes shining.

"You didn't say anything I didn't deserve, but yeah, I do." Jared smiled and looked down at Jensen's hands, "so about that school thing. Did your mom tell you she saved all your stuff?" Glancing up Jared's eyes softened when their gazes connected. "You'll go to art school yeah?" He shrugged, "I mean, you'll be eighteen soon, and I live closer to the school than you do..."

"She saved..." Jensen's lips pressed, tears sparking along his eyes. "I didn't realize... I'm... glad... I saved all the drawings of you," he sighed softly and nodded. "I will. I'll... wait a second, are you asking, I mean... are you saying you want me to move in?" Jensen's eyebrows lifted, small smile tugging at his lips.

"Well, not a moment before you're eighteen and your mom has rules. And you and I have to make sure things are... You know. That's if things are okay with you and I... And you want to... Stop me any time." Jared blushed a little and looked at Jensen from under his lashes.

"I think I'll just let you keep going," Jensen chuckled and pulled his hand up to lie on Jared's cheek. "I can't even begin to tell you how much I'm looking forward to my birthday," his smile grew and he brushed his fingers along Jared's jaw, over his lips for a moment before cupping his neck. "But right now I just want to get the hell out of this hospital and well... I'd kind of like a shower. You could-"

"Jensen Ackles I don't even want to hear you suggesting something so blatantly against my rules," Donna huffed as she stepped back into the room carrying a tray with jello and a bowl of soup on it.

Jensen frowned, "okay I give, I keep hearing about them. What are the rules?"

"It really boils down to no sex," Donna pushed the table with the tray over for Jensen, laughing at his expression. "Until you're eighteen at least. You'll be having your date nights at our place from now on. Yes Jensen, I figured out about how you two were meeting. All those times you went to see a _friend_. I should have put it together," she shook her head as if annoyed but Jensen could see the smile still on her face.

"I told you Jensen," Jared murmured almost under his breath.

"Well, at least I didn't lie?" Jensen offered and shifted over on the bed, pulling Jared down to his side. "You can't just stop us from having sex mom, that's not fair. You never stopped Josh from having sex."

Eyes-widening, Jared could feel his face starting to heat up.

"Yes well Josh wasn't dating an older man who happened to by a cop and my partner," Donna explained and Jensen had to admit that her logic made a little sense. "Now I'm not a total kill joy... you guys can... continue that... fooling around thing..." her face flamed with color and she looked away. "But I'm trusting Jared to keep my baby as innocent as possible. Because I do know how to use a weapon and I'm not scared to use it," she narrowed her eyes at Jared. "Understood?"

"Oh God, can someone just kill me now?" Jared covered his eyes with his free hand. Discussing his practically non-existent sex life with his _boyfriend_ and his boyfriend's mother was not exactly how he had pictured the hospital visit. "At this rate I'll never touch him again," he muttered.

"Hey!" Jensen protested. "I am not down with that idea. And I'm definitely not going to agree to this arrangement if that's in the terms."

Donna chuckled and shook her head, "you can always start spending your evenings with Mack and I." She pushed the tray of food toward Jensen with a warm smile.

"Perhaps," Jared smiled sweetly at Jensen, "you should stop talking and eat." He'd had just about enough of the talking business in so far as it involved him, and what he did or didn't do to Jensen. "Wait," his mind started to mull over Donna's rules, "we have to meet at _your_ house but we're still allowed to make out?" He groaned at himself. "I'm _so_ not... in your..." he sputtered, "no... "

The smile on her face told both boys that she'd figure Jared would feel that way. "Well at least you can't say it's my fault Jensen. I gave you the opportunity."

Jensen huffed and curled his fingers around the tray, tugging it closer so he could slide his jello closer. "Might as well just go live in the dorms or something," he muttered and struggled to pull the lid of the jello cup before sighing and holding it out to Jared.

Taking the cup Jared opened it and put it back on Jensen's tray, eyes moving over to Donna. He smiled warmly at her, _God_ she was an even more amazing woman than he'd ever thought. At this stage - to even be joking with them was ... well, remarkable. Things certainly could have been a great deal worse for Jensen and Jared.

"Well," Donna cleared her throat and covered a yawn with her hand. "I still need to swing by work to look in on a few things so..." she glanced at Jared then back at Jensen. "Will you be okay tonight?"

Jensen smiled softly at his mom and nodded, "I am seventeen mom, just a few months shy of eighteen. I think I can manage."

"Yeah well after what you went through..." she reached out and squeezed his shoulder softly. "It's okay to be scared Jensen."

"I'm not," Jensen shrugged and smiled reassuringly at her. "And I'll be here in the morning. Do some work, make Josh clean the house," his smile grew as she pressed a kiss to his temple.

"Night then. Jared," she smiled at Jared, reached across to squeeze his arm.

"Night Donna..." Jared watched her walk out of the room. "How's your jello?" He turned slightly on the bed so he could see Jensen's face.

"Amazing," Jensen rolled his eyes and set down the cup, reaching out for the soup instead. "How long are you staying?"

"Well, I guess if you're feeling okay - you don't _need_ me here," Jared tilted his head to the side and shifted down on the edge of the bed so he was lying on Jensen's pillow looking up at him. "I'm pretty tired, I didn't get a lot... well, you know." Blowing out a breath Jared closed his eyes, brow furrowing.

Jensen pushed the table and tray away and scooted down the bed, giving Jared as much room as he could. "I could sleep," he said softly, sliding his lips together for a moment before adding, "do you have any gum?"

"Gum?" Jared looked a little surprised.

"Well I can't really brush my teeth... so... and I kinda wanted to kiss you..." Jensen smiled hopefully at him. "Especially if you're going to ask me to be your boyfriend, which you have yet to do."

Huffing out a small laugh, Jared slipped his arm over Jensen's waist. "Jensen Ackles, will you be my boyfriend please?" Jared grinned and raised his eyebrows.

"Hmm..." Jensen hummed and tapped a finger to the side of his head. "Well... I do have quite a few prospects... but since you did ask so very nice and are definitely the hottest and most sweet, I think that yes. I would like to be your boyfriend," he nodded before grinning brightly. "Now do you have any gum?'

"I don't think you're allowed gum," Jared smiled sleepily, "or kissing for that matter, heart monitor?" He shifted so his lips were almost touching Jensen's. Because really? Who cared about bad breath? "My arm's not hurting you is it?" he asked, rubbing Jensen's side gently.

"No," Jensen whispered, sliding closer to feel the heat radiating off his _boyfriend's_ body, "Jared... kiss me..." He smiled softly, sliding his hand to Jared's chest.

Covering Jensen's hand with his own, pressing it harder against his chest Jared leaned in and pressed his lips to Jensen's.

Even with his chapped lips, it was still Jensen and Jared brushed his lips gently across his lover's for a few moments then pressed a soft kiss to the cut on his bottom lip. Chuckling into the kiss when he heard the beeping of the heart monitor speed up, Jared pulled back and rested his head on the pillow beside his boyfriend's. "Sleep - or I won't stay."

"I can tell we're going to have a very interesting few months," Jensen snorted and settled beside Jared on the pillow, blinking at him with a small smile. He thought about how a few days ago he'd never imagined being back with Jared, and how close they'd come to not getting to experience anything at all. "Jared..." his lip quivered slightly at the thought, mind suddenly flashing with a fist coming toward him. How was he supposed to go back to school now? Everyone would _know_ and if those boys were out of jail then they'd probably kill him. And if they were still in jail then they had loads of friends who might be more than willing to finish the job. Jensen's breath caught in his throat, eyes fluttering from the thoughts suddenly piling one on top of another.

"Hey... hey... you're okay now." Jared pulled Jensen onto his chest gently letting him settle against him. "We'll figure all this out. I swear I will keep you safe, Jensen, if I have to pick you up from school every day - or beat the shit out of those punks, or... or your Mom? Man, she's _so_ gonna kick their asses." He stroked his hand over Jensen's hair slowly, "they're locked up now," Jared knew exactly what Jensen was thinking, "and let me tell you - from what I heard they're feeling pretty guilty and stupid and you _know_ the cops at the station are not making anything very pleasant for them, yeah?"

"I bet everyone at school already knows," Jensen sighed shakily and lay against Jared, eyes closing once more as he pulled in a deep lung full of the comforting scent. "Man... were you out in high school? It fuckin' sucks. I'm so sick of getting my locker spray painted, getting beer cans thrown at me, being called fag and queer. I really just can't wait to graduate and get the hell out of there."

"I was and yeah," he shrugged and nodded, "Texas." Sighing Jared tucked Jensen's head under his chin, "just think how jealous they're all going to be when I take you to prom." He grinned into Jensen's hair, fingers rubbing the back of his boyfriend's neck gently.

"Will you really?" Jensen pushed up slightly, wincing as he tried to use his damaged arm. He collapsed back onto Jared's body and laughed softly, curling his good arm around him. "Thank you. They're all gonna want to be me. I can't wait."

Still smiling, Jared rubbed his hand on Jensen's back, "okay you... sleep. I'm gonna stay till you're asleep and then go okay?" As he sighed out a breath he placed another kiss on the top of Jensen's head.

"Alright..." Jensen nodded slowly. "Though if you leaving is supposed to convince me to sleep you're crazy..." he chuckled softly, letting his eyes close regardless. The medicine still pumping through his veins made him tired and Jared's warmth was comforting enough to lull him towards sleep faster than he thought possible. "Love you," he mumbled sleepily.

"I love you too," Jared reached down and tugged the blanket up over Jensen's shoulder then nuzzled into his hair and closed his eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

Jared stood outside Jensen's door straightening his tie. Clutching a bunch of roses and a partially wrapped bundle of what looked like sticks he blew out a breath and rang the doorbell. Completely insane. That's what Jared was, he was certain of it. Accepting an invitation to _meet_ the Ackles family? Insane. Shuffling his feet nervously, he straightened his tie again. The only reason he'd really agreed to it was because Jensen had come home from the hospital finally and Jared _really_ wanted to see him. And frankly, making out in Jensen's room didn't seem so unappetizing now they’d been apart so long.

"I got it!" Jensen yelled from down the stairs, running up them two at a time and sliding through the kitchen to the hallway.

Mackenzie was already at the door, halfway through tugging it open when she looked over her shoulder at Jensen before turning to greet their visitor. Her eyes widened slightly and she squeaked as Jared opened his mouth, turning and bolting around Jensen and down the hall.

Jensen laughed as he caught the door with his good hand, grinning at Jared, "don't mind Mack. She thinks you’re hot. Which you are so it makes sense."

"Oh," Jared blinked a few times, "I thought maybe I scared her or something." He smiled nervously and leaned down, "do I look okay?" He'd spent about an hour trying to figure out what to wear and decided on black jeans, a white shirt and a tie. Not especially unusual, except he knew that Jensen preferred to see him in jeans.

"You look..." Jensen stepped back to drag his eyes down Jared and properly take him in. A wide smile lit up his face as he reached out with his good hand to wrap around Jared's neck, "fantastic," he leaned in to press a kiss beneath Jared's ear before whispering, "though you'd look better naked." Jensen smirked as he slid back enough to press his lips to Jared's.

"Stop it," Jared hissed, "You'll get us in trouble before I'm even in the door." Rolling his eyes Jared handed the bundle of sticks to Jensen, "I didn't want to bring you a bunch of flowers so I got you a bouquet of... paint brushes and sketching pencils." Shrugging, he smiled shyly. He'd never been so on edge going to a dinner - it was ridiculous.

Jensen's smile fell for a moment, blinking a few times before stepping forward to curl both his cast and good arm around Jared. "Thank you," he chuckled as he stepped back before he could feel too sentimental. "I uh... need these," he shrugged and took the bouquet.

"Hey," Josh said as he descended the steps, eyes fixed on them. "How's it going?" He folded his arms over his chest and considered Jared with slightly narrowed eyes.

Jensen snorted and rolled his eyes, "Josh stop, you don't have to be all... macho man." Turning back to Jared he shrugged, "don't be fooled by my brother's pseudo manliness, he cried during Titanic so we all know he's far too feminine to fool anyone."

"He doesn't look feminine." Jared cringed inwardly and shoved the bundle of roses at Jensen's chest, "these are for Donna, uh, your mom." Turning back to Josh Jared held out his hand, "good to see you again Josh."

"You too," Josh nodded and shook Jared's hand while Jensen curled his fingers around the flowers.

"Hello Jared," Donna smiled at them as she came down the hall, "don't you look nice."

Jensen grinned and held out the flowers, "look he brought you flowers, isn't he sweet?"

Donna laughed and took the flowers, "he is very sweet. Thank you."

Groaning, Jared brushed his hair back off his forehead. "Hey, Donna, nice to uh, see you outside of work." This was really going to suck.

"Well I assume neither of my boys have even thought to offer you a drink," Donna glanced at Jensen and Josh who instantly dropped their gazes. Laughing she shook her head and stepped forward to grasp Jared by the arm and lead him to the kitchen, "we'll get you situated. You boys wash up for dinner." One glance over her shoulder had both Jensen and Josh moving down the hall to the guest bathroom. "You're nervous," Donna pointed out as she led Jared to the kitchen. "There really is no need to be."

"You've got to be kidding me, Donna. I love your son but he's going to be the death of me." Jared laughed and wandered around the kitchen, picking up things and putting them back down. "Was it that obvious that I was nervous? I mean I'm not really... but, well, a little." Jared almost dropped a small cow ornament and put it back carefully on the counter. "You need a hand with anything?"

"I've learned to read your emotions," Donna shrugged and nodded toward the fridge. "Fetch yourself something to drink then you can take those plates out into the dining room."

Jensen skidded around the corner, grinning at his mom when she sent him a disapproving look. "I'll help with the rest of the stuff," he offered and headed for the silverware, scooping some up in his hand and leading Jared toward the dining room. "I'm really glad you came," he told Jared over his shoulder, smile bright.

Jared put the plates on the table, "Jensen? I need a drink." Taking a deep breath he shot Jensen a look.

"Hey..." Jensen said softly, face falling as he stepped forward. "What's the matter? You wanna go downstairs?" Jensen rolled his eyes when Jared's expression morphed into disbelief. "Not like _that_. Jesus I do think about things other than sex. We can just take a moment to relax, regroup before dinner." He didn't like the tense line of Jared's shoulders, or how nervous he looked.

Jared's eyes darted to the kitchen then back to Jensen, "okay." Reaching out he grabbed his boyfriend's hand, feeling ridiculous for being so nervous. _God_ , he'd never in his entire life had to go and meet someone's family - let alone a family that involved his work partner, a little girl who seemed terrified of him and a big brother who looked like he wanted to kill him.

"We'll be right back," Jensen informed his mom quietly as they cross through the kitchen to the basement door. He caught her eyes for a moment and smiled softly, waiting for her understanding nod before he led Jared down the stairs to the open room he called his own. Jensen's own set of nerves sparked up, having Jared in his room. "So, I take it you've never had to meet anyone's family before," Jensen smiled softly as he turned to him.

"No, why would I have?" Jared walked over to Jensen's bed and sat down, resting his arms on his thighs. "Your brother looks like he wants to eat me alive. Have you ever brought a... no, I guess you haven't. What do they... does he think I'm gonna do to you?" Jared's eyes were wide as he looked up at Jensen.

Blowing out a slow breath Jensen crossed to him and dropped down, sitting so his good hand was free to rub along Jared's back. "I think Josh is trying to take on the roll my dad would. You know, family protector and all. And after the whole beatin... well... I think he's overcompensating. He feels responsible for not being here and looking after me," Jensen smiled softly and leaned against Jared's side. "It's all bark though. He knows my mom approves of you... of us. That's what really counts."

"Okay," Jared rocked his shoulder against Jensen, pushing him slightly, "how are your lips feeling?" Blinking, Jared tried his best to look innocent.

"Hmm, they could be better," he smiled softly at Jared and slid his hand up to Jared's hair. "Nice to see you outside the hospital."

Ducking his head down, Jared slanted his mouth over Jensen's quickly. The mouths moved together easily and the familiar sensation of warmth and anticipation ran through Jared's body. There had been a few quick kisses in the hospital but nothing like this. It had been _far_ too long as far as Jared was concerned.

Jensen moaned softly into the kiss, pushing forward for the feel of warmth and familiarity that he knew from Jared's taste. He opened his mouth wide, snaking his tongue forward and pressing against Jared's mouth until he could slide into the heat of Jared's mouth. God he hadn't even realized how much he missed Jared until this moment here.

Letting himself fall back onto the bed Jared pulled Jensen across his chest, "I want you," he whispered against Jensen's lips. Now... now that Jared had given up trying to fight everything, resist, he felt like he wanted everything _now_. Sliding both hands up Jensen's back, over his shoulders and up into his hair Jared moaned quietly, tongue tangling with his lover's.

Jensen shivered slightly and lay heavily on Jared, "You... you can't say thing like that when we have to go up for dinner like, now." He grinned against Jared's lips, "maybe after dinner we can come back here and get more properly reacquainted. My door does have a lock." He pulled back enough to meet Jared's eyes, grinning at him.

"Wait... are you _actually_ gonna stop kissing me?" He grinned and raised his hand to Jensen's forehead, "are you okay? Are you in pain? Have a fever?" Sliding his hands down to Jensen's ass he squeezed hard, "I guess if you want to go back upstairs we can." Maybe spending some time at Jensen's house wasn't going to be as bad as he'd expected.

Jensen snorted and slid forward, "well by all means we can keep kissing but neither of us locked the door and I'd rather not have Josh coming down here to get us. He's rude enough not to knock." He leaned forward to brush his lips against Jared's. "After?" He asked hopefully, rocking his hips into the heat of Jared's body.

"MMhmm," Jared closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. "Okay... should we...." his fingers massaged Jensen's ass, feeling the muscles clench under his touch, "go back upstairs?"

Jensen opened his mouth to answer but was cut off by his mom yelling down the stairs for them. Chuckling softly he pushed up and grinned, "guess that's a yes. Are you better now? Ready to face the fam and show them how utterly awesome you are. Even if more than half of them already love you."

Chuckling, Jared tugged at the front of his jeans. "Okay, but walk slow." When Jensen looked amused, Jared just shrugged, "it's been a long time." He got up off the bed and trailed along behind Jensen back up into the dining room. Mack and Josh were laughing and bringing food into the room as they rounded the corner then Mack saw Jared, went bright red and darted into the kitchen. Jared just watched her go with his mouth open and a puzzled expression on his face.

"Don't tell me you've never had to deal with little kid crushes," Jensen laughed at Jared's expression and dropped into his seat, reaching out to pull out the chair beside him. "Whenever her friends come over for sleepovers it's like hell. I walk into the room and it's dead silence, I walk out and there's a sonic boom of giggles."

Josh snorted as he came back in the room with two bottles of beer, offering one to Jared. "My mom insisted I extend an olive branch." He glanced at the bottle and shrugged, "beers about as good as I could do."

Looking very grateful, Jared took the beer and sank into the chair beside Jensen. "What's for dinner?" He took a couple of sips of beer and put it down on the table before looking questioningly at Jensen.

"Lasagna," Donna answered as she walked in and Jensen snapped his mouth closed, smiling softly. They all tended to talk over each other when all together and after so many years he was more than adjusted. "It's Jensen's favorite, and since we're celebrating his health, it seemed only fitting." She took the head seat at the table and smiled at Mackenzie as she slid into the seat beside her and across from Jensen, Josh dropped into the one across from Jared and Donna nodded. "Well this is nice. Everyone dig in."

The group fell silent as they dished up food and passed bowls around. Jensen rolled his eyes as his mom served food onto his plate and pushed it toward him but he smiled and said a quiet thank you. Once everyone had been served, Josh lifted his eyes to Jared and smiled as he asked, "So Jared, have you had a lot of young boyfriends?"

"Josh," Jensen groaned and rolled his eyes.

"Hey I have a right to ask questions about the guy you keep rambling about spending _forever_ with," Josh smirked at the bright blush that shot along Jensen's face before turning back to Jared with expectant eyes.

Jared took another _longer_ gulp of beer. "I... uh... actually, I've only had two other boyfriends and they were both older than me, so," he looked up at Josh, "so I guess the answer to your question is no." Smiling slightly he took a deep breath and picked up his knife and fork.

Jensen just barely resisted the urge to stick his tongue out at Josh. "So Josh, how is Karen? You actually gonna propose one of these days?"

"In fact I am," Josh huffed and spared Jensen a glance before turning back to Jared. "What about you Jared? Are you looking for a long term thing?"

"Mom, make him stop," Jensen hissed to his mom, eyes pleading.

Donna smiled and reached out to pat Jensen's shoulder. "Jared you don't have to answer anything if it makes you uncomfortable. Josh, play nice."

Josh shrugged and lifted his beer to his lips, still considering Jared.

"Well," Jared slipped his hand over to Jensen's on the table and held on to it staring down into his eyes while he spoke. "Jensen and I haven't really had a chance to talk about it, but yeah, Josh," he turned to look at Jensen's brother, "I'm interested in a _long term_ thing. As long term as Jensen will allow." Looking down at his dinner his hand slipped off Jensen's and settled back beside his own plate.

Jensen beamed, smiling growing wider and wider as it seemed that Jared's comment had left Josh speechless. "I, for the record, am very interested in a long term thing. So don't worry Josh, I appreciate your concern but really, stop," he smirked at his brother, shaking his head slightly.

"Well," Josh sighed and nodded, "I'm just lookin' out for you Jenny, can't get your little heart all broken again. We all know how insufferable and girlie you get."

Jensen cringed slightly and shook his head more forceful, "you're an ass."

"Jensen," Donna warned before lifting her eyes to her eldest son. "Both of you. This is no way to act in front of company. Now shut it before I have to get more forceful."

The table fell silent in the wake of Donna's strong words, both boys head's dipped down to their plates. Jensen sighed softly, worried this dinner was just going to get more and more awkward. Then Mackenzie cleared her throat and asked quietly to Jared, eyes lifting slowly, "are you and Jensen gonna get married?"

Choking slightly on the beer he was trying to swallow Jared looked at Donna, Jensen then back at Mackenzie. "I uh, well, okay Mack. I'm taking Jensen to Prom, and I hope that... he'll move in with me later," he glanced over hurriedly at Donna, " _much_ later - and yeah, Mack, we might do that one day if Jensen doesn't get sick of me or something..." He could feel the heat creeping up his chest and dropped his eyes to his plate stuffing a mouthful of lasagna in quickly before anyone could ask him anything else.

Jensen grinned around his forkful of food and spread his legs wide enough to rest against Jared's.

"I think it's safe to say Jared will be around for awhile Mackenzie," Donna said softly and reached out to tuck some hair behind her daughter’s ear. "Now Josh, let's hear more about this you proposing to Karen thing. It's about time. Let's hear the details."

Jensen let his smile linger on his lips as the conversation drifted away from Jared, _finally_ , and focused entirely on Josh. Leaning over slightly, Jensen whispered to Jared, "you made it through that quite dashingly. Good job." He grinned at Jared and bumped their knees together.

Lips twitching into a smile Jared hooked his ankle under Jensen's and stuffed some more lasagna into his mouth. He was actually quite certain this was worse than the last job interview he'd had.

The rest of the dinner passed a lot smoother then the first half. Josh's story about how he was going to propose to Karen seemed to pull Mackenzie from her silent little stupor, or shyness that seemed to weigh heavily over the table. None of the family was used to the girl being so quiet. Jensen was pleased with their dynamics, glad they seemed to open their arms for Jared and now that the questioning was done, Jared seemed to relax more into the natural flow.

After dinner Jensen and Jared helped clean up, though Jensen couldn't do much with only one arm. In the end Josh helped Jared a lot and Jensen leaned against the wall, watching them as Josh asked Jared about his life outside of being a cop and dating Jensen. Once the kitchen was done Donna came back in, saying Mackenzie was set up with homework on the now clean table. So the group headed into the living room, Josh and Jared with fresh beers and Donna with a glass of wine. Jensen was beaming as he settled into Jared's side on the couch, not even to bother to keep up with the conversation the three older people in the room started up. Something about politics or the government, Jensen _really_ didn't care.

Finally when it was almost nine Donna seemed to register the looks Jensen had been throwing at her for the past hour and pushed up from the chair, "Well I imagine you boys would like some quiet time to talk. Josh and I-"

"It's okay, we'll go downstairs," Jensen insisted and pushed up from the couch, grinning at his mom before turning to look at Jared. "I wanted to show Jared some of the pieces I started in the hospital for my senior art show anyway. I mean... if you are staying for awhile," he added, smile faltering for a moment as he rolled his eyes at Josh's snort of laughter.

Laughing Jared looked over at Donna, "Mrs. Ackles? How long may I stay with Jensen?" He smiled sweetly as his fingers slipped through Jensen's.

Donna laughed softly and shook her head, "Jensen's curfew is midnight. Though I have a hunch you knew that."

Jared let Jensen pull him toward the basement door, "got it!" He turned and followed Jensen downstairs. "Drawings? You started drawing again?" He hummed thoughtfully and took the stairs two at a time just to keep up with Jensen.

"A few yeah," Jensen nodded, stopping when they got to the bottom of the stairs and pushing him up against the wall. "I have to have twenty new pieces for my project. It’s for my art class. I'll show you in a bit," he insisted and stepped up close to Jared's body, hand curling around his neck.

As he swallowed, Jared's hands moved automatically to Jensen's hips. "Does this mean you're not gonna show me the drawings?" He smiled, yanking Jensen as close to him as possible. The weight of his lover's body against his felt good, made everything feel a hell of a lot better than it _had_ been feeling while Jensen was in the hospital. He needed this. "Why," he brushed his lips along Jensen's forehead, "did I think I could be without you?"

"I have no idea," Jensen shook his head and frowned at the cast on his arm. "This damn cast. I guess I'm just lucky it's not my right arm. What would I do?" His eyes lifted up to Jared, tracing along his features. "God Jared I'm so glad you... that we... I mean it hurt _so_ bad without you. Don't _ever_ do that to me again," he insisted, laying his head on Jared's chest. "I couldn't take that."

It made Jared's heart hurt to hear those words. They stuck into him like little splinters and he was pretty sure he'd never be able to truly get rid of the sick feeling that swept over him when he thought about what he'd done. "I... I'm sorry Jensen." There wasn't much point in saying anything else, they both knew _why_ Jared had thought he was making the right decisions and they both knew he knew _now_ that he was wrong. Moving his arms up to wrap around Jensen's back, Jared breathed in the scent of the younger man.

"It's okay," Jensen said softly and wrapped his good arm around him, tilting his head up to bury in Jared's neck. "We're okay now. Just had to put that out there." Pulling back he grinned up at Jared and stroked his hand through Jared's hair. "So, wanna see my drawings first or are you gonna make it up to me first?"

"Make it u... oh." Jared's brow furrowed even as he started to smile, "I guess that's up to you. Should I start working on making it up to you now?" Turning his head slightly, he slid his lips across the underside of Jensen's arm, tongue dragging along the sensitive skin.

Jensen's knees dipped slightly as he leaned forward, smile on his lips, "yeah... you could definitely do that now."

Saying Jensen was nervous was a complete and total understatement. He was beyond nervous, like, mind about to explode little bits of Jensen all over his freshly cleaned room kind of nervous. It felt a little ridiculous really because this was _Jared_ and Jensen had spent the past four months officially _dating_ him - under the watchful eye of his mother of course. And often Mackenzie though she generally hid at the top of the stairs or behind the wall to the dining room until Jensen called her on it and sent her skittering away in a mass of giggles that always left Jared laughing and Jensen rolling his eyes.

As great as things were going though, this felt more official than anything else. In a few weeks Jensen would be eighteen - and he had big plans for that night though he doubted Jared would allow them since his mom still insisted he couldn't stay the night at Jared's. Shortly after Jensen would graduate and it would start a whole new chain of events. He'd never really imagined going to his prom, the whole being the only gay kid in school thing kind of put a damper on the event, but then there was Jared. His own personal knight in shining armor, or knight in slick black tuxedo.

"Shit..." Jensen groaned, mind supplying the image too readily. Last thing he needed was to get incredibly turned on while wearing these black dress pants that hardly did anything to cover... _anything_.

Flexing his fingers on his left hand, still adjusting to the post cast feel, Jensen lifted his hands to work at the tie. It was no use, he sucked at doing these things. "Mom!" Jensen hollered up the steps before ascending them two at a time, stepping out into the kitchen and sighing dramatically, "my tie hates me. Please whip it into submission."

Donna's eyebrows lifted slightly as she turned to him, stopping short at the sight of him. "Oh Jensen..." her hand rose to her lips to cover the wide grin, eyes pricking with tears.

Jensen rolled his eyes and huffed, "Jeez mom it's just the Prom. It's not like I'm getting married."

"Don't even talk about weddings. What with Josh's coming up, and this prom thing, and your graduation right around the corner... next thing you know I'm gonna be all alone in this house," Donna sniffed as she slid across the kitchen to work at Jensen's tie.

"And what am I? Rice pudding?" Mackenzie rolled her eyes as she stepped into the kitchen, eying them. "You look lame," she told Jensen.

Glancing over at her Jensen laughed and tugged on his shirt, "better go get all dolled up Mack, Jared's gonna be here any minute and you wouldn't want him to see you looking like... _that._ "

Mackenzie's face paled and she spun on her heels, taking off out of the room.

Jensen snorted and looked back, cutting off sharply at his mom's disapproving eyes. "She was asking for it."

"I know I raised you better," Donna huffed and smoothed Jensen's collar over the tie. "Now remember what I told you about tonight, if anyone tries to start any trouble."

"Let Jared show them his gun," Jensen nodded and reached out for his suit coat on the back of the chair.

"Jensen!" Donna protested, eyes slightly wide.

"I'm kidding mom, don't worry, Jared's not even bringing his gun so _chill_ ," Jensen laughed as he slipped his arms into the sleeves. "Don't worry, things have calmed down since then. People even seem more okay with me. Even Chris has completely come around so seriously, it's gonna be fine. I'm more nervous about Jar-" Jensen cut off as the doorbell rang, eyes shooting toward it. "Shit, I don't even have my shoes on, tell him I'll be right there," Jensen turned and darted down the stairs before his mom could even warn him about language. As he pulled his shoes on her could hear the front door opening and his nerves tripled and once more threatened to explode.

Jared stood on the Ackles' front porch and combed his fingers through his hair. It was getting too long again but Jensen always pitched a fit if Jared suggested going to get it cut. Jared had realized months ago he was doomed to a life of trying to please Jensen - because that smile... he sighed and shook his head... that smile made it all worth it. The months had raced by in a blur of stolen kisses, make-out sessions in Jensen's bedroom that made Jared feel like a teenager again and some wonderful evenings with the Ackles family. Jared's life had changed so much in such a short period of time he still found it hard to believe it was all real. Now, here he was, in a Tux with a boutonniere and picking up his date. Jared hadn't even gone to his _own_ prom.

He rang the door bell and turned to face the street, taking in the colors of the late spring leaves. When he heard the door open behind him he spun quickly.

"Hey there Jared," Donna greeted with a warm smile, tugging the door open to allow Jared to step inside. "You look fantastic. Jensen, of course, is still preening downstairs." Donna shut the door behind the man, stepping back to touch his arm gently. "Nervous about tonight?"

"A little," Jared smiled and straightened his tie, flattening it against his shirt, "never even went to my own prom." He flashed a smile at Donna and leaned in to kiss her on the cheek. "Thank-you," he whispered. He figured, after everything they'd been through it wasn't enough - _thank you_ \- but she would know it was for everything.

"Always thanking me," Donna laughed softly and squeezed Jared's arm fondly. "You should really teach Jensen some of those manners."

"What are you talking about? I have plenty of manners," Jensen scoffed, coming around the corner and stopping just inside the hallway. Swallowing thickly he gazed at Jared, eyes dragging over the crisp lines of the suit, slicked back hair, _perfect_. "Hey," he said softly, stepping toward Jared with a tentative smile.

Jared had heard the term _breath-taking_ before but he'd never really completely understood it until Jensen appeared in front of him. His hair, as usual, was perfect - he truly was a bit of a preener but _God_... The dress pants were a perfect fit, hugging the younger man's hips then falling full to sit against his shoes. A crisp white shirt just made Jensen's freckles stand out more than usual and Jared gasped in a breath of air as his lungs started to ache. "Forgot to breathe..." he mumbled, eyes locked with Jensen's. His first instinct, which he followed with little regard for the fact that Donna was standing right beside them, was to close the distance between them as quickly as possible. His hand slipped under Jensen's jacket and pressed into the small of his back pulling him forward into a long, slow, kiss. " _Jesus_ ," he murmured when he finally drew back, "you're gorgeous." Jensen's eyes sparkled and he smiled. Yeah - _that_ smile- _so_ worth it.

Clearing his throat Jared closed his eyes for a moment and stepped back, smoothing the lapels of his boyfriend's jacket. "Hi," he said softly.

"You should greet me like that every day," Jensen observed, swaying slightly into Jared's touch. His lips were tingling pleasantly, whole body thrumming in response to Jared's greeting. His heart was racing in his chest and he couldn't erase the goofy grin on his face. "You look amazing."

Donna cleared her throat and stepped forward, holding up a camera, "you boys step together, let's get some pictures to document this wonderful evening. Before you two get too wrapped up in each other that is."

Jared slid back in beside Jensen twining their fingers together and slipping his free hand down over the curve of Jensen's ass. Flashing his brightest grin for the camera he dug his fingers into his young lover's ass. He was starting to think that Jensen would _never_ be eighteen.

A quiet squeak left Jensen's lips a moment before the camera flashed, smacking Jared on the chest lightly and turning toward him. "Tease," he murmured quietly, grinning up at Jared and laughing as the camera flashed again.

"You two look so amazing," Donna sighed softly, taking another picture of the pair.

"C'mon, let’s get out of here before my mom starts crying... again," Jensen laughed and paused for a moment to turn into Jared's chest, laying his head on his shoulder in a gentle hug. He'd probably never properly thank Jared for taking him to prom but he had a feeling Jared knew without words.

In a flurry of _good-byes_ , _be carefuls_ and _have funs_ they finally made it to the door. Jared pulled the door open and smiled, "shall we?" He followed Jensen out the door and down the driveway. When Jensen stopped dead in his tracks Jared almost ran into him then side stepped at the last second. Moving up to the side of his new motorcycle Jared swung his leg over the seat. He grinned at Jensen's face and started the bike - the low rumble wrapping around them in the golden light of dusk.

They'd been joking around it before this, Jared buying a motorcycle and Jensen riding behind him, all snug and tight. But actually _seeing_ Jared on the motorcycle, in the tight suit that left so little to the imagination, was almost too much. Jensen's knees almost felt weak and he was suddenly more painfully hard than he thought possible considering the confining pants he was wearing.

Holding out his hand Jared winked. "Let's go..." he raised his voice over the deep purr of the engine, grabbed Jensen's hand when he finally moved and hauled him up onto the bike behind him.

Settling onto the seat behind Jared, Jensen tried not to fall too hard forward. He really wasn't too keen on letting Jared know just how turned on he was, though he was certain the man had a pretty good idea. Clearing his throat he gave up trying to distance himself and slid forward, settling into strong and comforting warmth.

Jared smiled again when Jensen's hands slid around his waist and he felt the familiar warmth of Jensen's breath against his neck.

"You're so fucking hot," Jensen said against the back of Jared's ear as they backed out of the driveway. His friends were going to be _so_ fucking jealous of Jensen and his incredibly drop dead sexy detective boyfriend/prom date.

He could feel Jared's laughter vibrating through his chest as they started off down the street. Jensen briefly wondered if his mom knew about the motorcycle. Grinning into Jared's shoulder Jensen let his eyes fall closed against the slight burn from the wind. He'd thought it several times over the past month but Jensen was fairly certain he was the luckiest guy in the entire world.

Jared gave up trying not to smile on the drive to their destination. The way Jensen felt, pressed up against him, _possessive_ he was really damn tempted to drive straight to a Motel and by-pass the prom all together. A promise, however, was a promise and he had a boyfriend to show off.

When they pulled up at the Hotel the Prom committee had booked there was a crowd of students outside and Jared made sure he pulled up _right_ in front of the largest group of people. Waiting until Jensen slid off the bike behind him Jared swung his leg down and tossed the keys to the valet, slid his arm around Jensen and ducked down to take his lips in a hard kiss. His tongue ghosted across his boyfriend's lips then was gone and Jared smiled down at him, nose twitching as he tried not to laugh. "Let's do this..."

Jensen actually _giggled_ which would have been embarrassing if he wasn't so completely caught up in his boyfriend, and the people now openly staring at them. It seemed like _everyone_ had stopped to take notice of the two arriving, which wasn't that surprising considering the way the motorcycle had echoed around them. Now his lips were still tingling and he leaned heavily against Jared, allowing his boyfriend to lead him forward into the hotel.

People buzzed around them and the room was outrageously over decorated with balloons and streamers and a whole bunch of random frilly shit that Jensen would have scoffed and declared it tacky if he wasn't so happy being here. They checked in at the main table, following the trail of people - who openly stared - to the photographer set up by the front door. Jensen would have been okay with bypassing the photo thing all together but his mom had made him promise before and well, it would be kind of neat to have a wallet shot of the both of them all dressed in, something to carry around and display proudly.

Jared's arm draped over his shoulder so casually, so familiar, Jensen's cheeks already hurt from the intensity of his grin but it grew more. Jared was the best boyfriend _ever_ and Jensen hooked his arm around the man's middle moments before the bulbs flashed. "Damn," Jensen grumbled, rubbing at his eyes as Jared led him from the backdrop. "So... should we get a drink?" Jensen asked as the light finally cleared from his eyes, head tilting up to observe Jared with a soft smile.

Nodding Jared threaded his fingers through Jensen's and tugged him in the direction of the refreshments. "What color do you suppose the punch is?" He looked around at the decorations, "my guess is pink." Laughing quietly he leaned down and whispered, "wanna leave an hour before curfew and stop by my place?"

"Really?" Jensen looked up at Jared with bright eyes. "Can we just leave now? We got the pictures, that'll be proof enough." Jensen grinned at Jared, knowing his boyfriend wasn't quite that easy to convince on the subject. He'd insist on some dancing at least. As they approached the refreshment table Jensen laughed, the punch was a bright and nearly sparkling pink. "Think someone spiked it?" He asked, leaning in close to speak to Jared because it made the moment feel all the more intimate. And Jensen was sure if he looked up at those people watching him he'd see more than a few jealous looks.

"Isn't prom punch always spiked?" Jared smiled and reluctantly pulled his hand from Jensen's so he could ladle some punch into a glass. "Here," he handed the glass to Jensen and poured one for himself. Taking a sip Jared frowned, "there really needs to be beer here." He nodded at a particularly giggly group of girls and slid closer to Jensen. "Now what do we do?" His lips moved against Jensen's ear and he sighed, "is it bad that I can't think of anything other than getting my hands all over you?"

Jensen clamped down hard on his bottom lip and leaned heavily into Jared's body, "yes it is bad if you expect me to stick around here after you say things like that." He glanced up at Jared and bumped their hips together. "Well, you wanna meet some of my friends? I can see them over there, and I think they're restraining themselves from barging over and demanding to know everything about this oh-so-perfect boyfriend they keep hearing about," Jensen shrugged as his eyes trailed over his friends before looking back up at Jared. "Or we could just go and figure out how close we can get on your motorcycle."

"I would like to meet your friends," Jared brushed his lips across Jensen's cheek. "I wanna meet the other people who were smart enough to realize how great you are." Grinning Jared slid his unfinished glass of punch back onto the table and slid his fingers into Jensen's hand and let himself be led across the hall.

If Jensen were completely honest with himself he was pretty nervous about Jared meeting his friends. There was no doubt in his mind that Jared was beyond amazing, it was more Jensen's friends that worried him. They weren't like him. Everyone had always been telling Jensen he acted much older than seventeen which was part of the reason why he and Jared worked in the first place, but his friends, they were _definitely_ seventeen. Even now as they approached them Jensen could see the girls giggling, the guys shoving each other roughly, most likely making inappropriate jokes.

Clearing his throat Jensen tugged Jared up and smiled at his friends. "Guys, this is Jared. Jared this is Chris, Mike, Tom, Pamela and Stacie," Jensen pointed to each in turn, cringing when all five surged forward at once to greet the man they'd heard so much about, all talking over each other.

"Dude he's not that bad ass-"

" _Ohmygod_ Jen he _is_ drop dead sexy-"

"Finally we get to meet the elusive Jared Padalecki-"

"Jesus Christ he's tall-"

"I don't see what's so great about him-"

" _Guys_ ," Jensen snapped, causing all five to clamp their jaws shut at once. "Give the guy a second to breath, take a step back, and _chill_." Jensen looked over at Jared and sighed, "sorry. Adolescent overload."

Throwing his head back Jared laughed slipping his hand back under the bottom of Jensen's jacket. He liked the feel of warm skin under the cool cotton. He also _really_ liked touching Jensen. No big surprise there. "Nice to meet y’all," he nodded in the general direction of all of them. They looked like a nice bunch - maybe a little high strung but then, Jared had been a bit elusive and he was sure they'd heard a lot. "Everyone having a great time?" Tugging Jensen closer he settled his boyfriend firmly against his hip. _Not_ because Chris was actually a good looking guy. Jared was absolutely _not_ jealous of   
anything.

"This place looks like Britney Spears and Lady GaGa got into a bitch fight and exploded all over it," Mike scoffed and wrapped his arm around Pamela's waist, tugging her close.

"That translates to yes, we're having a great time," Tom informed Jared with a wise nod.

Stacie giggled and leaned over to whisper something to Pamela who detached herself from Mike and giggled in return. Turning to Jared and Jensen as one both girls grinned brightly at them, "Could you guys kiss? Cause you're both so fucking hot we just _have_ too see it." They broke into giggles once more as Tom, Mike, and Chris groaned in unison.

Jensen laughed and shifted slightly to reach out and pat the top of Chris' head, "Don't worry boys we know you want to see it just as bad." They protested in loud grumbles and narrowed eyes, shuffling about as if Jensen had ruffled their feathers. Turning to Jared, Jensen's eyebrows lifted, "I don't know. Should we kiss for my perverted female friends?"

“Well,” Jared tugged at his collar suddenly feeling a little pressure to perform, “it’s your prom.” He shrugged and slid his arm further around his boyfriend’s waist ducking his head down to whisper, “any excuse to kiss you.” His tongue darted out quickly, sliding just over the edge of Jensen’s ear lobe and Jared twisted slightly to brush his lips over Jensen’s. For a few moments he forgot about all the people, the music, the ridiculous pink decorations and sank his mouth over down over Jensen’s. The taste of him, so familiar now never ceased to excite every nerve in his body. Someone moaned, him, Jensen he didn’t know but it jolted him back to reality and he pulled away. “Whoa… okay...” Jared cleared his throat.

"Wow..." Pamela and Stacie exhaled in unison, both flushed slightly.

"Damn, I'm completely straight and even I'll admit that was hot," Mike muttered and looked away, eyes fluttering. "I need to go do something very... not gay. C'mon Tom," Mike grabbed the man by the arm and tugged him toward the punch bowl.

Jensen was still a little weak in the knees from the press of Jared's lips but he recovered enough to laugh and turn to Chris, "I think they're going to spike the punch. Mrs. Hettinger is going to catch them."

Chris laughed and shook his head, hand dragging through his hair, "serves them right after everything they get up too. I hope they get detention until graduation."

Snorting in amusement Jensen tugged Jared toward the table and they group settled into individual chairs, Jensen glancing over at Jared to give him a big grin, "Mike and Tom are notorious trouble makers."

"The _worst_ ," Stacie added, sitting with Pamela on the opposite side of Jared.

"Remember the time they let the chickens loose?" Chris asked and the group burst into laughter.

Turning slightly to tell Jared the story, Jensen spoke through his laughter, "So they let six chickens loose in the school and numbered them one through seven, leaving out number five. I swear the teachers are _still_ looking for it."

Jared laughed, a slightly surprised look on his face, “that’s actually quite clever.” He grinned at Jensen, “I should try that in your mother’s office one day.” He winked and leaned back in his chair, stretching his legs out under the table. Leaning slightly toward the girls Jared flashed them his best smile, “so tell me ladies, how are your dates going this evening?” He chatted with the girls for a while, loving the way it made Jensen look even happier. Jared hadn’t actually thought that was possible but he knew Jensen loved his friends and – though might never admit it – this night meant a lot. Judging by the shit-eating grin on Jensen’s face it had also been important that Jared like his friends. Glancing briefly at his boyfriend while the two girls actually paused to breathe, Jared slid his hand over Jensen’s thigh and squeezed gently, leaning in to whisper, “okay?”

"Pretty much perfect," Jensen said softly in return, leaning in to brush his lips along Jared's. "You gonna ask me to dance or do we get to casually observe tonight?" He reached out to tuck hair behind Jared's ear, fingers sliding down his neck and cupping the muscles softly. His heart skipped a beat at the idea of dancing with Jared, out where everyone could see, enjoying laying on his chest and being encased by his arms.

“Just waiting for the right moment,” and just like everything else seemed to have fallen into place that night, the moment was _right_. Jared finally heard a slow song playing and it was even one he knew that Jensen liked. He knew this because Jensen had a habit of singing while he was wearing his iPod. It amused Jared to no end. Turning back to the girls Jared smiled and pushed his chair back, “excuse me ladies, I want to dance with my boyfriend.” Holding his hand out to Jensen Jared smiled warmly down at him, “would you dance with me Jensen? You love this song.”

Jared was very right, Jensen _did_ love this song. Ache by James Carrington and every time Jensen heard it he thought of Jared and how very much he always wanted to be with him. Heart twisting and contracting in his chest, Jensen pushed up from his chair and took Jared's hand, allowing his boyfriend to lead him onto the dance floor. A warm smile tugged at his lips as the man spun him round before tugging him close, chests molding together. Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared's waist, head tilting up slightly to stare into familiar features. "You're pretty much amazing you know that?" He said softly, watching a smile play across his boyfriend's lips.

Jared pulled his boyfriend closer loving the way their thighs brushed together as they danced. “Jensen, you’ve changed my life.” His smile faded a little and he tilted his head down so he could see into Jensen’s eyes. They were glassy, sparkling in the lights on the dance floor and Jared’s heart swelled. “I love you. You’re my whole life.” The words sounded simple, matter-of-fact but Jared had never been more certain of anything in his entire life. Ducking his head down he brushed his lips across Jensen’s. “Never want to be without you again,” he murmured.

Every part of Jensen was humming with Jared's words, echoing them steadily through his senses. "God Jared I love you so much," he said softly, fingers curling into the small of Jared's back and shifting up slowly. He could see the sincerity in Jared's eyes and it only made his heart speed up impossibly more, knees feeling almost weak as they swayed gently from side to side. "Don't have to worry about being without me, that's not gonna happen."  
Burying his nose in Jensen’s hair Jared took a deep breath. “Okay, so now I’m the most perfect boyfriend in the world… will you really leave your own prom a little early with me? I would _fucking_ love some time _alone_ with you and… your tux.” His blood ran a little faster just thinking about getting Jensen alone. Donna had been great, letting them meet at Jensen’s home, in his bedroom… but _God_ Jared missed those evenings of lying together on his couch just touching each other. Humming softly along with the song Jared smiled letting his hands slip down to Jensen’s hips.

"Yes," Jensen sighed quietly and let his eyes drift closed, relaxing into the gentle sway of Jared's body against his. "Can we go now?" He perked up, turning into Jared's head to brush his lips along Jared's hair. "Or after the song is over at least."

“Yeah,” Jared’s voice was lower, softer, “and we gotta say good-bye to your friends. Stacie and Pamela want my cell phone number so they can text me gossip about you.” Smirking Jared waved to the girls where they stood, heads together on the side of the dance floor. “They’re a little crazy those two,” he whispered to Jensen with a smile still plastered on his face.

Snorting a laugh Jensen nodded, "you're telling me. They're absolutely insane and a little terrifying sometimes but they're also pretty great." The song faded to an end and Jensen leaned up to brush his lips against Jared's, mouths sliding together gently before Jensen pulled back and grinned. "Okay let's go say goodbye, give them your number and such," he tugged Jared off the dance floor, not even caring that they hadn't even been at the prom for an hour. He wanted some time _alone_ with Jared and it thrilled him to know the man felt likewise.

While Jared was giving the girls his phone number, after all, he wasn't foolish enough to pass up gossip about his boyfriend, Jensen said his good-byes and sooner rather than later they were headed back outside. After tipping the valet and sending him off to get the motorcycle Jared scooped Jensen up close to him again, "you know, we can stay - I really don't mind. It's kind of selfish of me to want you all to myself."

Jensen leaned up into him, warm smile tilting his lips up, "trust me, there's no place I would rather be then alone with you for awhile." His hands dropped between them, sliding up under the coat to smooth into the crisp white shirt. "Feels like it's been forever since we had the chance to enjoy each other’s company without my mom pacing around upstairs."

"She's not so much pacing," Jared tilted his head to the side and grinned, "as standing guard. Making me aware of her presence." He chuckled softly and rested his arms over Jensen's shoulders. "I hear the bike." The valet pulled the motorcycle up in front of them and struggled to get off of it. Jared could feel Jensen trying not to laugh; the good thing about Jared's height was that he had no trouble with the bike. "Thanks man." Jared slid onto the bike and winked at Jensen, "come home with me."

Jensen grinned and slid forward, throwing his leg over the bike and shifting easily to loop his arms around Jared's waist. "You don't have to ask me twice," he murmured into his boyfriend's ear before laying his head on Jared's shoulder and settling in for the ride.


	6. Chapter 6

 

"You have way too much shit," Josh huffed as he dropped a box of stuff along the wall, wiping sweat from his forehead. "How I got suckered into helping you move is beyond me."

"I am your brother and best man asshole, it's the least you can do," Jensen reasoned, setting his own box beside the one Josh had put down. "And I do believe I've helped you move _twice_ and once was with Karen's stuff too. I don't even have furniture so shut your trap."

Josh lifted his eyebrows and turned to Jared as he entered the room. "How the hell do you put up with him?"

"I consider it my burden to bear, you know for Society." Chuckling, Jared picked up one of the boxes and walked off down the hall to the storage room. They'd decided that the boxes could go in storage and they'd sort through everything slowly. Well, Jensen would sort through everything, Jared had no intention of sorting _anything_. "Is that the last of it?" He yelled down the hallway over his shoulder.

"Thankfully," Josh snorted and headed to the kitchen for a beer.

Jensen scoffed in annoyance and grabbed the box he'd just set down, carrying it toward the storage room and holding it out for Jared. "Sorry, I didn't realize how much I had. I've been in that room for most of my life, junk accumulates. If there's not enough room I can take stuff back to my moms," he rubbed his palms against his shorts nervously. This whole moving in with Jared thing was nerve wracking. Sure they'd been officially together for more than half a year now, and quite a few months before that, but it was a _huge_ step. Jensen's heart was completely in it but he often found himself wondering if everyone else - including Jared - thought they were rushing things.

"What you worried about?" Jared's voice was soft, fingers brushing over Jensen's as he took the box from him and slid it into the storage room. Wiping the sweat off his brow with the back of his hand he leaned against the door frame and fanned the front of his shirt.

Shrugging, Jensen stretched his arms up above his head and rolled the muscles along his back. "I just think I might have pushed you into this. Like I push you into everything. Well... almost everything," he chuckled, knowing Jared would get the reference to this _not all the way_ argument. It was a familiar one they'd have since the night Jensen turned eighteen. Jared wanted to wait for the right moment and Jensen could insist that any moment would be right as long as it was with Jared until he was blue in the face, the man wasn't budging on the subject.

"Wait a minute," Jared folded his arms, "this was _my_ idea. You don't get to take credit for this one." Tilted his head to the side he studied Jensen's face, "you're okay with this aren't you? If you're not - I mean it's okay." Biting down on his bottom lip he stared at his boyfriend.

"I wouldn't have been so eager to if I wasn't," Jensen smiled at him and stepped forward, leaning into his warmth even if it had to be almost a hundred degrees outside and he was sweaty from moving. "I love you, and really, there's no place else I'd rather be," he reached out to lay his hand on Jared's collar bone.

"Then everything's fine then." Jared planted a kiss on Jensen's forehead. "I hear beer opening in the kitchen, we can rush Josh out and have a shower." He grinned and dragged Jensen back down the hallway.

Jensen grinned as he allowed Jared to pull him down the hallway. "Get out," he said to Josh as they came into the kitchen, smirk on his face. "Unless you want to be here while Jared properly welcomes me," he shrugged as he headed to the cabinet to get a glass.

Josh scrunched up his face and shook his head, "gross." He drained half his beer before looking at Jared. "So Padalecki, I meant to ask you... a friend of mine was supposed to be one of my groom's men but he's... not gonna be there for some stupid shit reason so, you up to filling in for him?"

"Wow," Jared glanced at Jensen, "sure, that'd be fun." Fun, and he'd get to spend the entire time with Jensen, and it would make it remarkably like Jared was part of the family which felt surprisingly good.

"Good, Karen will be relieved, she was freaking out about the party being even or something," Josh shrugged.

Jensen grinned brightly at the pair of them before stepping forward and throwing his arm around his brother. "You're so sweet Joshua, seriously."

Josh rolled Jensen's arm off his shoulder and punched his side lightly, "shut up."

Snorting a laugh Jensen pushed him back, grin still on his face. The idea of Jared in a tux for his brother's wedding was _very_ appealing. "Thanks for the help."

"Yeah yeah, I know I owe you, we're even now though," Josh finished the beer and crossed the kitchen to throw it out. "Well I'll just be on my way then. You two play nice," he scoffed and shook his head, heading out of the kitchen and shutting the front door roughly behind him moments later.

"My brother, king of the barbarians," Jensen shrugged and turned to the sink to fill up his water glass.

"So," Jared leaned up against the counter, "you're home now." Grinning crookedly he brushed the hair off his forehead.

Jensen drained his glass of water and set it in the sink, large smile curving up his lips as he walked to Jared and stepped close. "Home... I like the sound of that," he leaned forward, hands extending to lie on Jared's chest.

"What you gonna do first?" Jared looked around. "Eat, drink more... water," he frowned slightly. Amusing as it was, Jared actually found he was a bit nervous.

"I heard something about a shower," Jensen shrugged and stepped back, fingers curling around the hem of his shirt. "I definitely need one, all sweaty from the heavy lifting," he tugged the shirt up over his head; balling it between his hands as he reached the kitchen door and turned to the hallway. "You uh... could join me, if you wanted," he shrugged in his most casual way, even if his heart was racing just at the thought of sharing a shower with Jared.

"Seriously?" Jared took a couple of steps toward the younger man and yanked his shirt off over his head. "If you think it's a good... an okay... idea." Fingers undoing his button and zipper Jared took another step toward the hallway.

"I think it's a great idea," Jensen nodded and continued down the hallway, his fingers only shook slightly as he undid his button and dragged down his zipper. Once they were inside the bedroom he pushed his shorts and boxers off in one swoop, balling them up with his shirt and tossing them into the hamper on top of Jared's clothes. For some reason the sight made him grin and he turned to look at Jared. "We share the same hamper. That's... is it weird that it makes me happy?" He laughed at himself, stopping short as Jared's hipbone was exposed when his boyfriend began slipping down his pants.

Shrugging, Jared smiled, "I actually think it's kind of adorable, but then, I'm so... you know… biased." He noted that Jensen's eyes were locked on his hip and lowered his jeans slowly. Ducking his head down he grinned, "like the view?" He knew that _he_ liked the view, there was pretty much nothing that Jared would rather look at than Jensen - sweaty, glistening, naked. _Completely_ naked.

"Uh huh," Jensen nodded and stepped toward him, body stirring with heat. He felt his cock thicken, harden as Jared's flesh slowly came before his eyes. It didn't matter how many times he'd seen Jared naked - which wasn't much as of late due to the being stuck at his mom's place - Jared's body was always going to affect him in ways that made his mind spin and knees weaken. Jensen wet his lips and laid his fingers low on his abs, shifting to trace a mirror image along his skin of exactly where he'd want to touch Jared. Those fucking hipbones, Jensen was fairly certain Jared had the absolute best body _ever_.

Licking his lips Jared pushed his jeans and boxers down until he could kick them off. Eyes trailing down Jensen's body to his fingers, grazing over his own hips Jared could feel the warm weight of his cock as it swelled. "You gonna start the water?" Taking a few steps closer he rubbed his hand across his chest, scratching absent-mindedly, eyes locked on Jensen's.

Taking a step back toward the bathroom Jensen nodded and smiled, "yeah, I think I can manage that." He chuckled roughly as he headed for the bathroom and slid the glass door open, turning on the shower and letting his hand run along the water to adjust the temperature.

Jared moved quickly, pressing up against Jensen as he leaned slightly into the shower. "M'just helping," Jared let his hand move slowly down Jensen's until he could thread their fingers together under the warm water. Knowing that Jensen could feel how turned on he was, just made the whole thing more intense. He... _wanted_ , "Jensen," he breathed against his lover's ear, "I... want to touch you..." Pulling his arm back, fingers trailing up Jensen's arm again, he rolled his hips into the firm ass in front of him.

"Jesus," Jensen gasped, hand reaching out to curling along the glass door. His knees felt weak, body flaring to life with the mere suggestion of the touch. "You can..." he whispered, leaning back into Jared's body, "touch... all you want..." Jensen could feel the heat along his face and he turned slightly to look up at Jared. "We should get in?" He gestured to the shower with a soft smile, feeling just slightly shy now that everything was laid out before him.

Hands pressing against Jensen's back, Jared pushed him slightly so he stepped into the shower and followed quickly. The water was just the right side of hot, steaming up the shower and bringing a flush to Jensen's skin almost immediately. Jared grabbed the younger man's shoulders and turned him, sucking in a breath as their hips brushed. Curling the fingers of one hand around the front of Jensen's neck - Jared pushed his lover back under the stream of water. The water, running down Jensen's face, chest, beading in the rough curls surrounding his shaft just made Jared want his mouth all over that body. Leaning down, he dragged his tongue up the full length of Jensen's neck.

Jensen moaned softly, body arching into Jared's touch. He'd never felt Jared really take control like this and it was doing things to his body that he couldn't begin to process. Jensen slid his hands along Jared's arms, hips rolling forward to find some sort of friction. The water burned pleasantly along his skin, nothing compared to the heat of Jared's tongue, and Jensen resolutely decided to take as many showers as possible with Jared. "Your tongue... should be illegal," Jensen murmured, eyes fluttering as he tipped his head back to run under the steady stream of water.

Laughing quietly Jared let his hand glide down the middle of Jensen's chest, slick under the steady stream of water. Turning his hand slowly he pushed down over Jensen's abs, fingers finding the groves between his muscles. Grabbing his lover's hips Jared drew him closer, sliding their swollen shafts together. Slowly shifting Jensen back and forth Jared moaned softly, head falling back when the sensation was almost too much.

Jensen's fingers curled around Jared's shoulders, long moan falling from his lips as the pleasure of their cocks meeting tore through him. "Jared..." he murmured and curled forward to slide his lips along Jared's neck, rocking his hips into his boyfriend's steadily. Jensen kissed a trail up his flesh to his ear lobe, sucking on the tender skin before whisper, "I want you to fuck me. It's all I can think about, feeling you in me. I even... use my fingers, imagining it's you." He bit down on his lip as the words fell out, slightly embarrassed but mostly incredibly turned on that he'd confessed to touching himself like _that_.

Jared's entire body was drawn in by those words. He knew Jensen wanted it but hearing that husky barely-there voice right against his ear nearly made his knees give out. It was the strangest sensation, like his entire body took a sudden gasp of air. Breath shallow as his heart raced within his chest, Jared made a strangled noise. It was a half moan, half attempt at language and he spun Jensen back against the tiles. As soon as he had the younger man pinned there Jared grabbed Jensen's wrists and pulled them high up above his head. Jared's entire body shuddered as he leaned hard against his young lover. He panted softly across Jensen's cheek - the sound of the rushing water everywhere. Capturing both of Jensen's wrists with one hand was easy for Jared; his long fingers grasped tight around Jensen's slender wrist. "When..." he murmured, "when was the last time you touched yourself?" His voice was thick as honey against Jensen's cheek.

Jensen's eyelids fluttered as sharp pleasure zinged through him. It was a really good thing that Jared was holding him up with the weight of his body because Jensen was fairly certain his knees weren't strong enough any longer. Jared's words felt almost like a hand tightening around his cock and stroking roughly and Jensen panted softly, body rolling against Jared's. "Just..." he wet his lips and turned his face to Jared's, rubbing softly into his lips. "Yesterday. When I showered," he whispered, stomach clenching.

"God," Jared murmured. "I... not in here..." He'd had all these stupid idea about dates, and making the evening special and it all sort of faded away into the heat of Jensen's body against his. They were _home_ , together. Nuzzling into Jensen's neck briefly Jared released his hold on his lover's arms. Closing his eyes he blew out a breath and laughed softly against Jensen's neck, "you... _Jesus_..." Pulling back he locked eyes with his lover and smiled; Jensen's face was flushed, eyes heavy lidded and _beautiful_. "Let's get cleaned up," Jared growled as he reached out for the soap.

"Uh huh," Jensen mumbled and leaned heavily against the wall. His eyes slid down the long line of Jared's body, sucking in a small breath. He was fairly certain that it was going to happen, sooner rather than later, and that thrilled Jensen right down to the bone. Pushing off the wall he stepped into Jared's warmth, arms wrapping tightly around him. "You're pretty fuckin' amazing you know?" He murmured softly, fingers dancing along his spine.

The soap moved easily over Jensen's body, leaving a trail of suds on his sun kissed skin. "You're not so bad either," he handed the soap to Jensen, "make yourself useful." Grabbing the shampoo bottle Jared squirted some in his hand and put it back. Sliding his fingers through the younger man's hair he started massaging his scalp, lathering up the shampoo. He could feel that Jensen was a little tense -and why not? Moving in one moment... and then, here they were... and they both knew what was at stake. Jared smiled, and shoved Jensen to the side to rinse the shampoo out of his hair. "Hands, on me... soap..." he prompted with a grin.

"Yes sir," Jensen chuckled and pressed the soap into Jared's chest, creating a swirl of lines along his skin. Once he'd properly lathered his chest and back he dropped the soap back into the dish and rubbed his hands along the skin, down to his thighs to massage softly. A slow smirk curved up his lips as his soapy fingers worked the curls along the base of Jared's hard flesh, along his balls and finally stroking up. "All clean," he murmured as he dropped his hand, smiling in his best picture of innocence up at Jared.

Raising an eyebrow Jared found it hard to hide his smile. "That... part of me was pretty clean..." he licked his lips and slid past Jensen's body to slip under the steady stream of water. He made sure to slid his cock along his lover's hip and over his ass - smile widening as Jensen sucked his bottom lip into his mouth. "Okay... out..." If they kept this up Jared was pretty certain he was going to die right there in the shower. "Towels on the back of the door," he waited until Jensen stepped out of the shower and turned the hot water off, dousing himself in cold for a few moments and laughing. "God!" he yelled and leaped out nearly knocking Jensen off his feet.

Jensen's eyebrows lifted, towel stilling on his chest. "Trying to counteract how hot I make you old man?" Jensen smirked and reached up to grab the second towel hanging on the back of the door, tossing it and laughing when it landed on top of his head. "I understand your fear of not being able to last but we don't want to turn you off completely," Jensen smirked as he went back to drying himself off.

Yanking the towel off his head Jared started to rub it across his chest. "Smart ass," he mumbled. Finishing up quickly he tossed the towel in the hamper and padded out into the bedroom. "Come talk to me," he crawled up the bed and lay down on his side, damp strands of hair stuck to his cheeks.

With a soft smile Jensen ruffled the towel through his hair before tossing it to join Jared's and walking to the bed. He lay on his side facing Jared, smiling softly and dragging his hand through his damp hair. "So what are we talking about?" He asked as casually as possible, wetting his lips slowly.

"Which side of the bed you want?" Jared sucked his bottom lip into his mouth for a few moments. "I was thinking maybe that side... with the..." he nodded at the new stereo alarm clock on the night stand closest to the window. "Got it for you... for your iPod. I know you like to wake up to your music." Pulling Jensen in for a quick kiss, Jared smiled, "that's empty, the nightstand, for whatever you want. I just..." the smile faded off his face and he looked down at the drops of water running slowly down Jensen's neck. "I want... this is _our_ home, okay? Not my place... that you moved in to. You know?" He raised his eyes to his lover's slowly.

Jensen's heart skipped a beat and he stared at Jared with slightly watery eyes. "I... okay, it's our home," he wet his lips and shifted forward lay his hand on his boyfriend's chest. "Also I'm good with this side. I appreciate the clock; it's gonna be the only thing getting me to class on time." He smiled softly and spread his fingers on Jared's chest. "If this is my home I want... I should pay for things. My share of the rent and stuff. I do get some extra money for housing with my scholarship but I should get a job, a part time thing or something. Something I can walk too."

Jared frowned slightly, "I already cover the rent... would if you were here or not. You could help with the groceries and stuff if you want," he shrugged. "I'd rather you had the time you need to concentrate on school." He stared into Jensen's eyes - "but, you know? You do what you need to do to feel okay, yeah? Later, I'll show you where I keep all the bills and stuff... if you want." Shifting a little closer he pressed his lips to Jensen's briefly then lapped up a stray bead of water. "Besides, you keep callin' me old, what if you have to take care of me in my old age?"

"Good point," Jensen nodded wisely. He smiled softly as he settled him into Jared's warmth, draping an arm over his waist. "Well then I'll help with groceries and well... other things. If needed," he sighed softly and pressed his lips to Jared's chest. "I just want to feel like I'm doing my part. So you know... and I'll have to pay for my cell phone and stuff too," he yawned loudly then chuckled as he pulled back. "I... really want too... you know... but after all the moving..." Jensen blushed softly and shrugged, pursing his lips slightly.

"You're young," Jared smirked and reached over Jensen to tug the extra blanket over them, "hard work... you gotta build up to that." Sliding an arm under Jensen's neck he rolled onto his back and pulled Jensen across his chest, "I could use some sleep." Brushing his lips back and forth on Jensen's forehead he sighed. "I'm gonna like this," he mumbled.

"God me too," Jensen sighed blissfully and snuggled into Jared's body. The smile lingered on his lips even after he began to drift off to sleep.

Jared had no idea how long they'd slept but when he finally managed to pry his eyes open it was dusk. The fading light from the window made a small path across the floor. Jensen was still asleep, lips parted, cheeks flushed, lashes settled just above freckles. Sighing happily, Jared reached out and brushed a few strands of soft hair off Jensen's forehead. He laughed as quietly as he could when Jensen's nose wrinkled and he turned into the touch.

Jensen finally seemed to be mostly recovered from his injuries. For a while, Jared had been worried. Jensen put on a brave front - but Jared could feel the tension radiate off his boyfriend sometimes. If they were out somewhere and Jared reached for his boyfriend's hand he could see Jensen's eyes scan the people around them. He was _so_ thankful for the support Jensen got from his family. Certain, it was what had made it possible for Jensen to continue to be who he was.

Looking down at the man he loved, Jared smiled. Even in the past almost-year he had noticed changes in Jensen. He'd lost most of the boy-ishness of his look. The lines and curves of his body had sharpened, muscles more pronounced. Of course, he'd never lose the mischievous glint in his eyes or the nutty personality that made Jared fall for him in the first place.

Shaking his head slowly, Jared marveled at how lucky he was. A lover he adored; a new family to be part of - and now - home. Because, the condo had never felt more like a home than it did when Jensen was there and now he would be there all the time. He pulled the blanket back gently and stood as quietly as possible, allowing himself a last long look at Jensen before disappearing out the door to find some candles.

Back in a few minutes- Jared set candles up on all the flat surfaces in the room, lit them and slipped back into the bed. Pressing up against Jensen's back his arm snaked over his lover's waist, fingers rubbing small circles on the downy skin just below Jensen's belly button. "Jensen," he whispered before dropping a kiss to the shell of his lover's ear. "Wake up," he murmured.

"Mmhmm," Jensen nodded softly and stretched down into the mattress, rolling slightly into the warmth of Jared. "What time is it?" He mumbled as his hands rose to rub at his eyes before dropping to push him up on the mattress. At first he thought he was seeing things, eyes fluttering rapidly in surprise as he caught the flicker of flames from the candles around the room. "Wow..." he breathed, hand extending to lay on Jared's chest above his heart. "This is..." Jensen swallowed, surprised by the emotion stirring up in him at such a simple gesture. "Why Mr. Padalecki, are you trying to woo me?" Jensen grinned at him, falling back on his humor, knowing his boyfriend would understand it meant more than that.

Looking down a little, maybe he even blushed, "if I were... would it get me anywhere?" He looked back up at Jensen from under his lashes. Jared ran his thumb along Jensen's bottom lip, pulling it down for a moment.

Chuckling softly Jensen nodded and leaned into the touch, "yeah, I would definitely say it would." He shifted forward and brushed a small kiss to the corner of Jared's mouth.

"You... you're sure... about everything," Jared tilted his head slightly studying his boyfriend's face, "about us... this...?" His heart was racing because he knew the answer in his heart. There was no doubt in his mind that Jensen wouldn't be there with him if he doubted _them_ for a moment. Sometimes, Jared just needed to hear it.

"More sure than I am about anything else," Jensen smiled softly and rubbed his hand along the skin above Jared's heart. "You know how long I've been waiting," he added quietly, swallowing around the excited bubble of nerves that built up in him.

"If you ever... wanna stop..." he shrugged, "okay, I'm done." He grinned and took a deep breath. "I'm nervous," he said softly, shifting closer on the bed so he could feel the heat emanating from Jensen's body. One hand curved over his young lover's hip, such smooth skin under the pad of his thumb.

Jensen exhaled slowly and nodded. "Yeah. Me too," he whispered and dropped his eyes to trace the familiar pattern of Jared's chest. "But... I trust you. I know you'll be careful. Plus I _really_ want this so," he shrugged and chuckled softly.

Ducking his head down, Jared caught Jensen's bottom lip between his teeth and tugged on it gently. " _God_ , I..." Crashing their lips together, _hard_ , Jared shoved Jensen down roughly and rolled half over his smooth body. _Fuck_ he had waited so long. He thrust his tongue past Jensen's full lips and lapped up the taste of him, now as familiar as it was hot and wet.

Jensen gasped into the kiss and pressed his body up into Jared's. There was definitely no proper way to describe what it felt like to have Jared's weight over him; Jensen loved it more than he thought he should. Moaning into the kiss he pulled back enough to murmur, "will you do it like this? With you pressing down into me?" His arms wrapped around Jared, hands flattening along his back and sliding down.

"You like it...?" Jared's voice was barely above a whisper. His broad hand moved down Jensen's side, rubbing gently as he dragged his lips up his lover's jaw and licked at the sensitive skin near the front of his ear. "If you want, _anything_ you want..." he whispered.

"Well I want what you want too," he insisted and rolled his body up to meet Jared's. "But yes... I like... when you're over me," he murmured and curled his fingers into Jared's chest, dragging along the muscles. "Or when you take charge. Make me feel like..." Jensen swallowed thickly and tried again, "like you're in control of me."

"We maybe have to... explore that," Jared laughed softly against Jensen cheek. His hand slid behind Jensen's head turned it so their lips met, his tongue was back inside his lover's mouth, hands everywhere on the body beneath him. Jared rolled his hips gently, sliding his cock up the length of the younger man's and moaning. The kiss was rough, wet and Jared wasn't even trying anymore to hold back or silence the _want_ that had been building in him for so long.

Jensen felt like he was melting under Jared's touch, body flaring to life. His hands slid up to Jared's hair, tangling in the familiar locks so their lips could press hard together. Jensen had gotten very good at breathing through his nose during long make out sessions, since it made up the good majority of their interactions over the past six months. But now he wanted _more_ than kisses and his heart skipped a beat as he realized he was actually going to be getting that. "Jared," he gasped into his lover's mouth, rocking their hips together once more.

Jared's lips drifted down the long expanse of Jensen's neck and stopped briefly to suck a bruise onto the tender flesh. Smiling, he nipped his lover's collar bone then slid his tongue over the subtle curve of Jensen's chest to catch a sand colored nipple between his teeth. Tugging on the nub of flesh Jared swung his leg over Jensen's and pressed his thigh hard against the hard line of flesh. He curled long fingers around Jensen's shaft, " _so_ hard..." he mumbled, lips ghosting against the hardening nipple.

"God," Jensen gasped and arched up into Jared's touches. If he had been a little more in control of himself he might have said a big _duh_ to Jared's statements, instead he just gasped out, "for you..." Jensen shifted to hook his legs around Jared's, keeping them as close together as he could manage. He ran his hands along every inch of Jared's skin that he could touch, soft moans falling from his lips.

Growling, deep and low, Jared slid further down. He was panting already, _fuck_ he wanted Jensen - it was like something he _needed_. His tongue dipped into Jensen's belly button quickly then swirled around it in ever-increasing circles. His chin brushed through rough curls and his hands slid flat, fingers splayed down Jensen's body to settle over his hips. There was no mistaking how turned on Jensen was, his cock was burning into Jared's chest.

"I want..." Jensen moaned softly and rocked his up into Jared's body, feeling like all he could do was keep up constant motion. His mind was steadily chanting his lover’s name, body thrumming with pleasure and nerves. "Jared..." he moaned the man's name, and threaded his fingers through Jared's hair where they sat comfortably. Jared's lips were so close to his flesh and Jensen could easily imagine the way they'd burn along his skin. It took all his patience to not beg or plead for more.

A little further down and Jared's stubble rubbed down the burning flesh on Jensen's arousal. Inhaling deep and long, Jared pulled in the musky scent of his lover, filing it away with the hundred other things he adored about his man. Licking his own lips he stared up at Jensen, watching the younger man's body arch up off the mattress then sink back down, a wave of flesh. "What d'ya want?" Jared could barely get his lips to form words - hypnotized by his lover's writhing body. Before Jensen even had a chance to answer Jared dipped his head down and latched on to a patch of skin on Jensen's cock - he sucked hard then lapped at the flesh.

Moaning loudly Jensen lurched up into the touch, oversensitive skin burning under the warmth of Jared's mouth. "Fuck," he hissed at the sharp jolt of pleasure that curved right up his spin. Jensen was always of the opinion that Jared's tongue and lips were lethal and whenever he found them on his skin, Jensen marveled at the constant burning heat and want. "Y-you..." he gasped, "want... you." By this point he didn't care how, but he _hoped_ it involved that final step they'd been dancing around for months.

Pushing up Jared lifted his body off Jensen dipped down again and dragged his tongue up the length of his lover's cock. Tonguing the slit he drew the taste of pre-come into his mouth, the tip of his tongue rubbing the slick release into the roof of his mouth. He hung there, body suspended over his lovers, not touching him, just soaking him up with his eyes. "You... are so... sexy...." Jared licked his lips and leaned to the side, sinking down to the mattress as his mouth slid down to engulf Jensen's cock. He sucked, swallowed and slid down to the base as he managed to relax his throat. _So fucking hot_. Reaching under the pillow he pulled out a small tube and managed to get the top off so he could press some lube on to his fingers. While his lips and mouth moved over the silken skin of Jensen's cock his hand slipped down between his lover's legs - thumb pressing into his balls Jared's slick finger teased the skin by Jensen's puckered flesh. _God_ Jared could barely stand it - Jensen, so beautiful, hot, _his_. Hollowing his cheeks and moaning against the fiery hard flesh Jared sucked hard and long as the tip of his fingers pushed into the heat of Jensen's ass.

Jensen was assaulted with a swell of different sensations. The heat of Jared's mouth was sending rippled waves through him, causing his eyes to flutter closed as he moaned low in his throat. A second later - or maybe minutes, Jensen couldn't get his mind to process time currently - his eyes were snapping open once more as Jared's finger slid inside him. _Fuck_. It was so much better then when he touched himself there. Jared's finger was thick and full and Jensen's body shifted down to take in more almost automatically. "Jare..." he practically growled his lovers name, gasping a moment later as Jared sucked pressure along his aching flesh. "You gotta... shit... I won't last if..." he reached down to tug on Jared's hair, knowing there was no chance of him _not_ coming if Jared kept this up.

Smiling around Jensen's swollen cock he let his lips slide all the way up to the tip, sucked up the pre-come and pulled off. Licking his lips Jared looked up at Jensen's flushed features and twisted his finger gentle just so he could watch his lover twist like his body was on fire. Turning his wrist, Jared felt for the sweet spot - that sensitive bundle of nerves inside his lover's tight, hot ass.

"Fuck," he gasped loudly as a sharp jolt of heat flared through him, body thrusting roughly up off the bed, hips changing direction to grind down hard into Jared's hand. He panted harshly as he settled back onto the mattress once more, eyes fluttering rapidly to clear the dizzy haze building. "More," he moaned, lifting his head to stare down at his lover with wide eyes. "Nother one, please Jared... god..." Jensen's head fell back on the bed with yet another soft moan.

When Jensen started to writhe again, body arching up in the most amazing bow, muscles straining - perfect - Jared slid his second finger in, fucking into Jensen and loving the sounds he made - moans, soft cries, _Jesus Christ_ Jared's cock was weeping and throbbing just listening to the younger man. His fingers slid in and out, slick, moving quickly and as soon as Jared felt the muscles relax around his digits he slid a third finger _deep_ inside his lover. Jared was a mess, sweating, hands shaking, heart racing - _God_ \- it was like his first time all over again.

Having all three of Jared's fingers in him was much different from the three he'd managed to get in and the slight stretch and burn was oddly only adding to the mix of pleasure working its way through his system steadily. Jensen moaned something undecipherable as his body moved, shifting down into Jared's thrusting fingers. "I want..." he gasped loudly as Jared's fingers brushed against his prostate once more. "You. Do it." Jensen forced his head up to meet Jared's eyes. He'd never seen his lover so worked up, face flushed deliciously, lips swollen and glistening from the way his teeth and tongue kept moving over them. "Fuck kiss me," he muttered, wetting his own lips in anticipation.

Sliding up Jensen's body Jared slammed their mouths together, still working his fingers deep inside his lover. He thrust his tongue into Jensen's mouth at the same time as his fingers slid deep into his tight ring of muscle. Moaning into the kiss Jared tore his lips away to move back down. Dragging his hands down Jensen's body, squeezing his thighs, Jared sat back on his heels. Taking a few deep breaths he curled his hands around Jensen's thighs, yanked him closer and settled his lover's ass on his thighs. "Y'okay," he growled. He snatched the lube up off the bed and squeezed some in to his palm, rubbing the cool liquid onto his cock, watching Jensen's face.

"More than," Jensen nodded, biting down hard on his lip a moment later. His head lifted up to watched Jared, wetting his lips to pull in the taste of his lovers mouth. Jensen's heart skipped a few times, mind trying to imagine what it would be like once Jared was in him. _So full_. Nerves sparked along his body and he swallowed deeply, pulling in a long breath to steady himself. "God I... thought about this so much..." he murmured, eyes slightly wide.

"I love you," Jared murmured, eyes locked with Jensen's as he brushed the tip of his cock against Jensen's tight entrance. The _lust_ on Jensen's face, in his eyes, was so hot and Jared didn't mean to but his hips rolled slightly and he nudged inside his lover. The crown of his cock slid just inside the heat of Jensen's body and Jared moaned as his eyes fluttered closed. Letting his head fall back - Jared's body shook as he waited, wanting Jensen to adjust. The sensation was nearly _too_ much. Letting his hands move up Jensen's legs he pulled them up onto his shoulders, kissing the inside of his calf. "Lemme..." he gasped as another shiver ran down his body, "know."

Jensen sucked in a sharp breath at the intrusion, much bigger than three fingers, different, more round. His eyes clenched shut, body shaking slightly as he forced himself to relax and not clench around Jared and push him out. He'd never wanted something so badly in his entire life. "Kay..." he mumbled, shifting down to try and pull Jared in more. His hands fell to either side of him on the bed, curling around the sheets.

Shivering, desire washing over him in waves, Jared rolled his hips slowly and slid deeper into his lover. Once more he slid his hand down Jensen's thigh and let his fingers curl around his lover's cock. Stroking up, he slid further in, stroking down he trembled. Jensen's eyes were wide, glassy - the green almost hidden by the dark pupil. Twisting his wrist slightly he squeezed, drawing a moan from Jensen's full lips and another bead of pre-come from his shaft.

It was like every part of Jensen's body was hyper aware of the feel of Jared's cock sliding inside him. He growled low in his throat as Jared's fingers continued their work along his hard flesh. "Oh god," he gasped as Jared was _finally_ buried all the way inside him. Jensen had never felt so full in his entire life and it was the absolute _best_ thing he'd ever felt. Even the burn as he adjusted to the intrusion was good, connecting him to Jared in a way that seemed to make his body hum his lover's name. Jensen sucked in several deep lung fulls of air before he gently rocked down into Jared's body, murmuring his lover's name softly.

Jared's breath hitched in his chest as Jensen's hips rolled down. Shifting, kneeling up Jared fell forward to place his hands on the bed pressed up against Jensen's ribs. Hips rocking forward he thrust once _hard_ into Jensen - sending his lover's body moving up the mattress. Pressing down, he gave Jensen's the weight he wanted over him and rolled his hips quickly, thrusting in and pulling almost all the way out only to slam back in. Turning his head slightly his lips brushed across Jensen's mouth and he growled softly, tongue slipping out to trail along the swollen bottom lip. Each thrust was too much and not nearly enough and Jared felt so near to coming he could hardly breathe. Gasping into the kiss Jared moaned his lover's name.

Jensen met each thrust with an upward tilt of hips. His hands clung to the flesh spread along Jared's back, feeling the muscles shift and move with each thrust. Jared was laying on him enough to trap his cock between them, causing the skin to glide together with each hard thrust. "Love you," Jensen moaned into the pass of Jared's mouth. Every part of him was humming with the intensity of the situation. He was too close, he knew it, just like he knew this was the first of so many nights that he couldn't wait to experience. He clenched around Jared's hard flesh as he slid back in, moaning loudly when the tip of Jared's cock brushed his prostate.

"Can't... gonna..." Jensen's muscles so tight around his cock. Jared's body was on fire, every nerve was tingling, sizzling with desire and he could feel the tidal swell of his orgasm starting. Angling his hips up he tried to give Jensen as much pleasure as possible, shuddering each time Jensen twisted and writhed beneath him. He thrust hard, a punishing rhythm, feeling Jensen's cock hard and weeping rubbing slick against his abs. Reaching up Jared grabbed as much of Jensen's silky hair and he could and tugged his head back so he could bury his face in his lover's neck. Sucking hard on the skin, biting, thrusting and mumbling incoherently Jared couldn't stop moving.

Everything surged through Jensen's body, too intense for him to hold on any longer. Jensen gasped his lover's name, trailing off in a moan as his hips jerked forward then stilled as his orgasm curled up his legs and tugged through him. His fingers curved and dragged down Jared's back as his release shot through him in long thick ropes, over both their bodies. Jensen clenched tighter around Jared as his eyes snapped shut, head digging back into the pillow with each new wave of pleasure. Jensen had _never_ come so hard in his life and his body shuddered slightly as he rolled back from the heat.

Jensen's muscles clenched around him so tightly, his finger's dug into Jared's back and _fuck_ it was like his orgasm blew apart in his belly. He could feel Jensen's cock throbbing against his abs, the heat of his release slick between them. Thrusting hard one last time, Jared cried out and fell against Jensen's body as he came; his heart fluttered as his cock throbbed and pulsed inside his lover. Tongue slipping over his lips he licked his way into Jensen's mouth to offer tender, slow kisses as his hips rolled slowly.

Tightening his arms around Jared slightly Jensen whimpered into the kiss, body still tingling. He never wanted this moment to end, the connection they had, the way his heart felt so full it was threatening to explode. He opened his mouth slowly to graze along Jared's lips, hands coming up to stroke gently through his hair. It made it all a million times better to have Jared covering him like a warm blanket, pressing him down into the mattress. "I wanna stay here forever with you," he murmured against Jared's lips, rubbing their noses together slowly.

"Mhmmm," Jared murmured sucking on Jensen's bottom lip for a delicious moment. "S'good, never lettin' you go," Jared slanted his mouth over Jensen's and kissed him, pouring every ounce of love, _want_ and the emotions running through his body into that single kiss. Pulling back, he slid out of his lover - hating the loss of warmth and closeness. "You," he breathed, nipping Jensen's shoulder, "are the best thing that _ever_ happened to me." He rolled to the side slightly, groaning, fingers massaging the nape of Jensen's neck.

Jensen smiled sleepily and curled into Jared's body, arm wrapping around his body. "I can definitely ditto that sentiment," he murmured and sighed blissfully. "Guess it's safe to say moving to Colorado was a very smart idea on your part. Maybe one day you can take me to Texas and show me around," he chuckled softly and lifted his hand to tuck Jared's sweat damp hair behind his ear.

Laughing softly, Jared tightened his hold on Jensen, "my mama will _love_ you," he smiled and turned to kiss Jensen's wrist as it moved past his lips.

"Good," Jensen chuckled and settled in beside Jared, quite content to sleep once more. And hopefully repeat the whole event over again. "Sleep?" He asked softly, eyes already closed.

Sighing, Jared shifted away, "I'll be right back," kissing Jensen's forehead he slipped off the bed and padded slowly around the room blowing the candles out one by one. When he reached the bathroom he grabbed one of their towels and blew out the rest of the candle as he made his way back to the bed. Kneeling on the edge he laughed at his sleepy lover, "c'mere you." Tugging Jensen a little closer Jared wiped his chest and belly clean then stood up and wiped himself down. Dropping the towel on the floor he yanked the sheets down under Jensen's dead weight and slipped under them, chuckling as Jensen barely seemed to have the energy to wrestle his way into the bed. "You need more practice," he said as he pulled Jensen into his arms and held him against his chest.

"That a promise?" Jensen mumbled, snuggling his head into Jared's warmth, small smile curving up his lips. The heat soaked over him and whatever Jared said blurred against the sleep. He barely managed a soft, "love you," before he was drifting off.

Stroking Jensen's hair, Jared smiled. _Perfect_.

Jensen let out a low growl as he stared at himself in the mirror. "Stupid fuckin'..." he mumbled and once more let the silky fabric of his tie dropped to either side of his collar. For a moment he considered just not wearing a tie. He was the best man he could get away with it. But Josh would probably pummel him, which wasn't nearly as terrifying as the prospect of the death glare Karen would give him. She was pretty damn intimidating; you had to be to end up with someone like his brother. As much as Jensen loved the guy, he'd never understand what she saw in him. "Jared..." he whined softly as he turned and headed out of the bathroom. They were getting dangerously close to running late and Jensen would rather not be chewed out by his mom. He stopped in his tracks as his eyes landed on his boyfriend, blinking a few times and blowing out a long breath. "Damn."

Eyes widening, Jared cleared his throat. Jensen was gorgeous. The dress slacks were snug in all the right places and fell in a perfectly straight line from his slender hips. Even though his shirt wasn't buttoned it fit like a glove and all Jared could think about was grabbing the damn tie and dragging Jensen up against his body. _That_ would not get them to the church on time. Chuckling, he held out his hand, " _you_ look _so_ hot right now... c'mere - I'll do it."

"Uh huh, you can do lots of things," Jensen grinned suggestively and slid forward, pressing flush into Jared and curling his fingers around his hips. "I am going to have _so_ much fun undressing you tonight," he chuckled and leaned forward to brush their lips together.

Grinning, Jared could feel himself start to blush. " _God_ you never quit." Yanking on Jensen's tie he pulled his lover in for a quick kiss and then started to tie it for him. "So... how you feel about... maybe one day," Jared chewed on his bottom lip for a few moments, "you know..." Flipping one end of the tie over he tugged it through a loop.

Jensen's eyebrow curved up and he smiled slightly, trying to figure out what his boyfriend was hinting at. "One day?" He asked quietly, tilting his head back slightly to give Jared more room to work on the tie.

Doing up Jensen's top button, Jared tightened the knot but didn't let go. "One day... maybe marrying me." He shrugged and looked down. "I mean, you know if I asked you and stuff." Why was he blushing? _Jesus_.

Jensen blinked once and swallowed, staring up at Jared with slightly wide eyes. "I... yeah... I'd like... I mean, if you asked one day. I would..." He nodded and wet his lips around a small smile. "Are you going to be asking one day?"

Jared pressed the tie against Jensen's chest and ran his hand down it. "I got you something." The corners of his mouth twitched into a smile. Reaching in to his pocket he pulled out a heavy silver bracelet; he grabbed Jensen's hand and fastened the clasp sliding the bracelet so Jensen could see the engraving on the flat plate in the front. "In his ordo est ordinem non servare" Running his finger over it Jared tilted his head, "It means, in this case the only rule is don't obey the rules." His smile grew, "I figured - you know - it suited you."

With a soft laugh Jensen nodded and grinned down at the bracelet, scanning over the faded smear of green paint along his wrist. "Thank you," he said softly, heart clenching slightly. It did fit him, very much so. But Jensen knew they were both grateful for his pushing, it got them to this place here. "It's beautiful," Jensen grinned up at him and leaned up to brush their lips together.

"MMmm," Jared spoke softly against his boyfriend's lips, "and Jensen?"

"Yes?" Jensen whispered, fingers shifting through the slightly wavy locks at the back of Jared's neck.

"I'm definitely going to be asking..." Jared smiled as his kissed Jensen.

Jensen grinned into the kiss, melting into the familiar warmth of his boyfriend's body. His mind was already racing over ideas of when Jared might ask, how that might go. Jensen chuckled as he pulled back slightly, "my sister is going to giggle until she explodes after you ask me. We'll have to tell her very carefully and possibly with an EMT standing by." Jensen laughed, head tilting back slightly.

"I just don't get women... of any age." Jared grabbed Jensen's shoulders and pushed him back gently. "If we're late for your brother's wedding we won't live long enough to get married ourselves." The idea kind of thrilled him. There was no way he was admitting that out-loud though. _Getting married_. Who would have thought?

"Good point, I'm not sure who would murder us first," Jensen stepped back and dragged his hands through his hair. "Okay, let's go do this thing so we can come back here and I can properly enjoy you in that tux," he grinned at Jared before turning to cross the room and get his shoes. It was one of the greatest thing about Jared, every time he thought he couldn't be happier, the man did something to make his life just ten times better. Jensen figured he was just lucky that way.

"I'm thinking, you leave your tux on... partially, later..." Jared's eyes went distant for a few moments then he shook his head and smiled. "Okay... let's do it..." He held out his hand.

Stepping into his shoes quickly, Jensen caught a final look at himself in the mirror before turning to Jared and grabbing his hand. "Love you, by the way," he grinned and allowed Jared to guide him out of the bedroom.

 ** BONUS **

**Track Listing In Order**  
For Your Entertainment – Adam Lambert   
Goodnight and Go – Imogen Heap  
Be Be Your Love – Rachel Yamagata   
Speeding Cars – Imogen Heap  
Nevermind Me – Maria Mena  
Walk Away – Ben Harper   
Color Blind – Natalie Walker   
Best I Ever Had – State of Shock  
Ache – James Carrington  
The Best Thing – Savage Garden  
Send Me On My Way – Rusted Root

[Complete Download including Art](http://www.megaupload.com/?d=Z5MYNONG)

 _Incase you’re wondering, the art on the back cover is the painting Jensen made for Jared way back during Christmas_


End file.
